Who enjoys weddings?

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Caveat said:
I actually like them sometimes.

Apart from being happy for the couple (when relevant) I like the unpredictability, the corniness, the atmosphere and the general mayhem. (Or maybe I just move in strange circles!)
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To be honest, this is what I find lacking in most weddings. They all just seem to follow the same formula - bland meal in a bland hotel room followed by an ear splitting band that kill all attempts at conversation and drive all the elderly relatives to leave early. I find it quite difficult to distinguish one wedding from another afterwards. The couple of weddings I do remember are the ones which didn't follow the conventional route and also the ones that had a small crowd instead of a cast of hundreds.
 
My general policy is that I never go to a wedding that I can get out of. Your day is probably already set in stone. I find the photographer and videographer to be a nuisance at weddings, I didn't bother with either at mine; my wife made up an album from the best of the guests photos.
 
michaelm said:
I find the photographer and videographer to be a nuisance at weddings, I didn't bother with either at mine; my wife made up an album from the best of the guests photos.
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I agree, endless photo shoots and videos make the whole thing seem completely staged. Some people are more worried about the photo album and DVD than enjoying the day itself.

The next worst thing than a boring wedding is being forced to watch the wedding video !!!
 
I wonder do the Bride and Groom enjoy the day themselves, I probably should say Bride as the men usually don't do stress and it doesnt matter too much if they get drunk
 
I didn't particularly enjoy mine. I was worrying too much about everyone else. Ours was a pretty low key affair and all.
 
Not a fan at all, but unfortunately you can rarely say no if its a close friend or work colleague.

My most hated bit, the speeches.

95% of those at the wedding have heard 95% of the speeches/jokes before but you still have to laugh like its a fresh joke.

"I think you'll agree how beautiful my new wife (cheer) looks today" (applause).
 
I don't like weddings much but the best wedding I ever went to was an evening wedding during the winter. The wedding took place at five o' clock and then on to the hotel. It was more like a good night out. There was no hanging around all day and everyone enjoyed themselves just as much.
 
Don't like weddings or other functions where I know very few people, not into trying to make small talk with strangers.

My pet hate about weddings is the eternal wait after arriving at hotel for meal to be served, sometimes up to four hours. Is this a suggestion made by hotels so we will spend lots of money on alcohol? I can't tolerate alcohol on an empty stomach.

Apart from the old rumbling tummy I mostly find it very boring unless its a family wedding and I have people I know to chat to.

Was at my husbands niece's wedding recently and it was very well organised, despite my reservations when I learned the church service was at 1.30pm. I thought here we go again, another wedding of hours hanging around.

But no, church 1.30. Arrive at hotel 2.45. Tea coffee biccies on arrival. Bride and Groom arrive at hotel about thirty minutes later after their photo session.
After their arrival we were served savory finger food, which went down a treat with a G&T. Dinner at the reasonable time of 5.30.
Floor cleared very quickly for dancing. Brilliant band, suited all ages and not too ear splitting. Absconded when the disco started at 1.30.am after having a very enjoyable day.

Can anyone tell me, do hotels dictate time of serving dinner?
 
It seems, from all the posts on here, that what most people hate about weddings are:

a. Being forced to hang around for hours making small talk and drinking on an empty stomach while the bride and groom are off being photographed beside some picturesque lake or rose bed.

b. The loud raucous bands that exclude anyone who doesn't want to dance from enjoying the proceedings.

Maybe any future brides and grooms reading this thread might take note.
 
A custom I would actually like to see re-introduced, is the bride and groom changing into 'going away' clothes and all the guests standing on the steps of the hotel waving them off to start their married lives together. I think this was much nicer than guests just slipping off at the end of the evening while a slightly bedraggled bride and groom head for the residents' lounge with a few die hards.
 
I'm not married but am in a long term relationship. Have been to three weddings in the past three months and, while I have enjoyed them, I do think the "set formula" is very staid. I'd like to see entertainment at weddings other than the traditional band and dj. One of the weddings did have fireworks and I thought that was a great idea because everyone left the main room to get a breath of fresh air - giving the hotel staff a chance to clean up. Someone else told me about a wedding where photos of the couple as children were played on a screen at the reception before the dinner and this gave people a laugh - a nice ideaI thought.
 
I love weddings - I particularly enjoyed my own!

I did what I could to make it a really enjoyable day for my guests. I was right on time and walking up the aisle at 1pm (I think I was actually there before some of the guests...!). There was no making guests hang around after the mass for photos, my husband and I got some taken and everyone headed to the hotel at their leisure. Upon arrival at the hotel I had tea/coffee/hot nuts/sambos/non alcoholic cocktails and mojitos for the guests. We had 2 hours until the meal and it was a lovely day so people sat outside with food and cocktails. For something a bit different I did photo keyings as favours, the pics were taken during the drinks reception and the key rings were at the peoples places when they entered the room for the meal. The meal was gorgeous, faultless, and people were offered loads of extra meat and veg (part of the reason we chose the venue was because of the food). I made party bags for each of the kids at the wedding and these were handed out by the staff after the meal. The kids were all so chuffed and good as gold during speeches as they were so enthralled with their gifts (tiaras, jewellery, stickers, colouring pencils, feather boas, hair slides, that sorta thing for the girls). I had the paddy power sweepstake kits for during the speeches on each table so it made that a bit more fun. We had an excellent band, then Irish Dancers, then excellent DJ. It was a very fun relaxed day with loads of food and drink provided and everything went like clockwork. I had a bus to take people from the church to the hotel and then after the dj it dropped people off at 3 different destinations. All the guests really had to do on the day was turn up and enjoy themselves.
So many people have told me it was the most fun wedding they have ever been to!

The weddings which I don't enjoy as much are usually the ones where little effort has been put in. Crappy meal followed by useless dj that plays for 5 hours then taxi home.
 
Have to say I am definitely not a big fan of weddings and try to avoid at all costs - have even in the past made sure to book my holidays on the same date as an upcoming wedding. I think the majority of Irish weddings all follow the same pattern - same outfits, bride usually in strapless white gown all of which look the same to me, loads of hanging around, decent enough food when it does come out but am usually half cut from drinking on empty stomach so not bothered eating!. Any weddings I have been to recently - the brides have all been saying how they want to do things differently etc and therefore they have brought in a troup of Irish dancers or something to entertain- the same Irish dancers at last three weddings i attended! (no offense intended DeeDee). Overall everything follows the same pattern, same speeches, same clothes, same entertainment & food, usually dies a death around 12 when everybody is hammered and gone to bed, not my thing at all!. I think the main problem is that even the couple don't enjoy it, I don't know many who actually said that they enjoyed the full day, usually too busy worrying about guests etc. I will be keeping mine very simple I can tell you!
 

We kept ours very simple 4 years ago, 65 people at it , one best man and bridesmaid( I've never understood why you'd need more), really good food, good band and nothing too fancy. We'd read all the magazines, gone to a couple of fairs and really decided to draw a line when we saw ads for doves and butterflys

Each to their own but by keeping it simple we didn't have to worry about things going wrong and we had an absolute ball and it was the 2nd best day of my life (best was the birth of our smallie 2 years later). On top of that, we didn't spend a fortune, I got a decent ordinary suit, no dress suit or any stuff like that, wife bought her dress in the annual sale at that shop in Athboy whose name I can't remember. Our only OTT thing was that my wife, as a music lover, wanted really good music in the church so we splashed out a little there and a really good photographer. We'd no video other then a friend with a camera on a stand.

Above all, we controlled it ourselves, our wedding, we were paying for it and the inlaws on both sides had to deal with it and accept our choices( and in fairness, bar one aunt, they did)
 
I must say I thoroughly enjoyed mine and didn't worry about the guests at all. I just felt that after all the effort I had put in if they didn't enjoy it then it was their problem!

I often find people love to say oh I'll be having little fuss at mine or I'll be keeping mine very simple, its all about me and my fiance yada yada.... Thats all well and good but these are usually the weddings where very little effort has been put in and the guests have a very long tedious day. If you want little fuss or to keep it simple I think the only thing to do is head off just the bride and groom and get married, that really is no fuss and just about the two of you. If not, and you are expecting guests to give up their day to spend with you (and quite often give an expensive gift) then you have to entertain them (whether they've seen it all before or not).
Another thing I always find gas is when say 'Mary' says she is going abroad to get married as its just so much less fuss. Turns out its Mary plus 100 guests in Spain with the exact same wedding as they would have in Ireland only people had to get a flight to the venue and stay for 3 or 4 days. How is that less fuss!

Weddings are pretty much all the same, whether they are here or abroad, no fuss or loads of fuss, once there is good food, good entertainment and good company then its usually a great day out! (unless your some sort of oddball that doesn't like socialising).

I do think this debate could go on and on though!
 
Of course different strokes for different folks applies here, some want a traditional style wedding, some want something a little different. For us, we have told guests no presents or money, we are having short civil ceremony followed by couple of drinks then a meal in nice restaurant with good band playing (choice of ten main courses) - we have then reserved vip area in bar/nightclub for after restaurant for those who wish to party on. I have a short dress which I will be changing out of after meal - jeans and a top for the rest of the night. Money they would have given on us will be spent on their own hotel rooms etc should they so require.

I also think the mentality from the wedding dress shops and the wedding market in general here is that it is not a wedding unless its a big white dress and bridesmaids etc - I was treated with nothing short of scorn by a couple of these shops when I informed them that I wanted a short white dress for civil ceremony. I also went to the wedding fair in the RDS hoping for something just a little different in terms of venue/clothes etc and left after half an hour. Everything on offer is the same, same cars, same clothes, same type of hotels etc -I think there is a market out there for smaller city weddings, something a bit funky and lets face it cheaper, but from what I can see nobody is catering for it!
 
Book out a restaurant, everyone pays for their own meal and no presents...everyone wins
 

I don't think that's a fair comment. The majority of people on here have said they find the traditional wedding tedious. Are we all oddballs who don't like socialising?

In fairness, I think a lot of couples would like to keep their wedding quiet and simple or do something a bit different and individual, but come under pressure from parents to have the usual 'do' in a hotel that all the relatives and neighbours can come along to. And parents are a big part of your life and shouldn't be made to feel excluded from such a momentous day in that life. So I suppose a lot of it ends up being a compromise.
 
 
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