Saw Child Verbally Abused in Shop

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What struck me about the situation was that the adult was treating the child as an adult in her treatment of her and her bullying/aggression towards her,rather than an adult child/relationship. The language alone(the bits I could make out) and the body language gave that away. People may, or may not understand what I am trying to say here. If you do, you will understand the concerns. If you dont you will think that this is another busy body interference. Whether I saw all of the plot unravel is not really relevant, my judgement call is that what is saw is concerning enough to warrant reporting.

So will contact Community Garda, good suggestion about the CCTV. Will tell them what I saw and they can tell if they or Social Welfare should do anything. I would like Social Welfare to call to house to assure themselves that all is ok and they can see family in own environment to hopefully allay any concerns.

Again, thanks all.
 
MandaC said:
What struck me about the situation was that the adult was treating the child as an adult in her treatment of her and her bullying/aggression towards her,rather than an adult child/relationship. The language alone(the bits I could make out) and the body language gave that away. People may, or may not understand what I am trying to say here. If you do, you will understand the concerns. If you dont you will think that this is another busy body interference. Whether I saw all of the plot unravel is not really relevant, my judgement call is that what is saw is concerning enough to warrant reporting.
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Wait until the day comes when you as a parent are responsible for navigating your way through a supermarket or shopping centre with a small contrary child. You will cringe when you remember your reaction to this incident.
 
ClubMan said:
I can't believe that I am reading this. Why not give the guys on CSI Miami a call while we're at it? :rolleyes:
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I actually think its a good suggestion. As I witnessed the incident, I know that if CCTV were on that till and if anyone in authority were to view it, that the concerns would be clear.
 
ubiquitous said:
Wait until the day comes when you as a parent is responsible for navigating your way through a supermarket or shopping centre with a small contrary child. You will cringe when you remember your reaction to this incident.
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No, I have to say I never will. Without going into too much personal detail, I had a difficult enough childhood and can tell a mile off the difference between someone who is losing their rag in sheer frustration at a contrary child as most parents do, or someone who is agressive in an adult way towards a child.
 
MandaC said:
I actually think its a good suggestion. As I witnessed the incident, I know that if CCTV were on that till and if anyone in authority were to view it, that the concerns would be clear.
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Do you honestly believe that the supermarket manager is going to treat such a query seriously and actually sit down with you and maybe the Gardai to review the "evidence"? If you do then best of luck.
 
I have to say I second Ubiquitous.
I have been reading this thread, and it is really astounding the way it is going.
CCTV footage? Giving the gardai a car reg to hunt down a harassed/under pressure mother?
If this was everyone's reaction, every parent with a young child prone to tantrums/acting up/being in bad form would have to watch their back leaving their homes. Or every parent having a bad day would have to hole themselves up at home, for fear of someone reporting them.
This seems like a completely over the top reaction, and will probably not end up helping anyone.
Nicola
 
The mother shouted and used some foul language, this in Ireland where the f word trips off the tongue. Do people actually think the police/social services are interested in parents who shout at their kids - that's about 99% of parents. Shouting is better than hitting and maybe it's the mother's way of letting off steam (which is a good thing).

Yesterday my two year old decided (again - once a week occurance) not to walk back to the car and I held her firmly and made sure she walked to the car (10 minute walk), after explaining calmly (which actually doesn't work with a 2 year old) that she must walk and she roared like she was in torture all the way as I passed parent after parent - do you think parents (me) like this sort of thing, it's embarressing, it's life, it's parenthood, but the other parents understood, because from time to time I see their kids howling too and do I interfer, I do not. Most parents think "thank goodness it's not my child today."

I too agree with Ubiquitous.
 
<Expletives deleted>
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You won't get a Garda to take action on that...

I was ashamed a few weeks ago, in a similar situation, to call one of my own kids a "twit". Thankfully this was not in public or I could have been in the same boat as this lady. Its very easy to say something unwise or intemperate when stressed by a child's bad behaviour.
 
I have been pulled up here when trying to post exactly what was said, (and bear in mind I could only make out some of it) as its too much for the boards.

If its too much for the boards for us adults here(and it is strong enough stuff in fairness) why is it not too much for a 3 year old child.

To subject a small child to at least a five minute tirade of constant agressive shouting and foul language is mental abuse. Should any person put up this? For any reason? Let alone a child who cant even answer back. Its a real shame.

Anyone who thinks it is the same as calling a child a "twit" (and then feeling sorry) is not really getting what I am saying and for the most part, I suppose, thank God for that.
 
I have two small children. Yes, I agree, all parents get mad and loose their temper and give out to their children. They wouldn't be normal if they didn't. But what we must remember is that there is a line not to be crossed. For any parent to curse and swear and shout at their child in a public area poses serious questions in my mind. I would be very concerned. I certainly don't think my conscience could let it go, to do nothing if I were the O.P.

I would never dream of cursing or using foul language in front of my children never mind to them.
 
MandaC said:
I have been pulled up here when trying to post exactly what was said, (and bear in mind I could only make out some of it) as its too much for the boards.

If its too much for the boards for us adults here(and it is strong enough stuff in fairness) why is it not too much for a 3 year old child.

To subject a small child to at least a five minute tirade of constant agressive shouting and foul language is mental abuse. Should any person put up this? For any reason? Let alone a child who cant even answer back. Its a real shame.

Anyone who thinks it is the same as calling a child a "twit" (and then feeling sorry) is not really getting what I am saying and for the most part, I suppose, thank God for that.
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So - what have you done about this case on a practical level other than posting here?
 
Margie, fair play, your children are lucky. Your response is 100% why I am concerned.

Clubman, will be following up after work.

Thanks all.
 
ClubMan said:
Is time not of the essence here? Who knows what shouting the child might have to endure in the meantime since the incident two days ago?
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Ahh ClubMan quit stirring will ye, really sometimes ye just can't help being contrary/sarcastic can ye? The OP has a clear idea of what she needs to do and only came on here to get advice on where best to go about it. So let it go will ye?
 
ClubMan said:
Is time not of the essence here? Who knows what shouting the child might have to endure in the meantime since the incident two days ago?
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Have to say, you have really topped yourself with that comment. Really hopes it all keeps fine for you.

And to be honest with you, my own father grew up in Artane Industrial School. It took 62 long years for his story to be told and believed despite trying to tell it from practically day 1.

With attitudes like that, maybe we should just keep on turning a blind eye and ignore the signs and our instinct that something is wrong.

If I can help a child in any way(I am not sure I can) after 2 days, then perhaps we really have come a long way in this country.
 
As a mother of 2 young kids I would be VERY slow to report a stranger after seeing ONE incident I didn't like. If I were to do so would have to report a lot of people as I would see similiar incidents every day. If on the other hand I had witnessed a neighbour constantly shouting/abusing her kids then that would be the time to act as it would not be a one-off and I would feel more able to persue it.

I would dread to think that any guard/social services would act on a report by soemone to one isolated incident that to me sounds as if the mother just lost her temper. I would have to be absolutely sure that the child was going to be in danger before interferring and can the OP be sure here?
 
Is it acceptable behaviour for a moderator to make fun of an issue concerning a child's welfare. Once gain I'm appaled by Clubman's attidude. mandac, you do what you feel is right, only you saw what happened. I fully support you.
 
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