imo strictly enforcing the regulations would involve an unacceptable degree of intrusion into peoples private lives and an infringement of their civil liberties. Should there be welfare enforcers hiding under people's beds or in the bushes outside their bedroom windows in order to ensure that they don't have any overnight guests that are in gainful employment.
Some might say that if one wants to accept handouts then one should be willing to put up with the intrusion.
I, however, do not think that. It's understandable that a woman/mother wants to socialise and it's perfectly normal that while doing this, she meets someone with whom she makes a connection. Good luck to her! From the male perspective, he might like or even love the woman but that does not mean he's willing to take her and her children on. Not initially at any rate. The problem, as I see it, is that as the relationship continues, the male often moves in....but they have become used to the social welfare payments on top of his salary and do not want to give this up by 'coming clean'. Greed enters the picture. I have personal experience of a young woman standing before me, telling me she intended to become pregnant for the second time, as she'd 'make more on it'!! Her words, not mine.
At this stage, the woman on social welfare and her partner are able to afford an awful lot more than a couple raising their children by their own devices. The latter's income is taken up by keeping a roof over their heads, medical bills, clothing etc. On the face of it, they look like they earn more, but in REAL terms they have less disposable income. Naturally this situation breeds resentment.
The sad thing is that the solution used to be social housing. In the forties and fifties, councils built places for people to live. Not so in the days of the Celtic Tiger! The best we could do in the seventies and eighties was to put people 'in the back of beyond'. I didn't think it could possibly get worse but the Celtic Tiger proved me wrong!!
My solution would be to give an unmarried mother a chance to get back on her feet for six months after giving birth. At that time, I would provide education and free creche facilities. When she finished vocational training, I would provide these facilities free for a further year, if the woman was in gainful employment. If her chosen career did not meet all her expenses, then she could be entitled to family income supplement, at the same rate which so many 'ordinary' couples are entitled to. Ireland, I feel went from the sublime to the ridiculous......initially unmarried mothers were shunned.....then, through guilt and not wanting to be seen as backward.....we threw money at them.
Having a child is not an illness. Thousands of women with children work every day, as do their partners, in order to keep a roof over their heads, and to feed, clothe and educate their children.