Single,30 somethin,what to do where to go

Thanks for all the replys and advice.

Still doin the internet dating thing,unsucessfuly so far.
Two dates,one complete physco(the only word to describe her),and the other was a lovely woman but was a bit older than she said she was(10 years to be exact).
Think the next time,i'll ask to see a recent picture and i'll ask them to hold up a news paper in it,before i meet them.
 
Internet dating scares me! My cousin met an American mormon on the Internet when he was 25 he ended up marriedin Utah and caught her arranging an internet hook up less than a year later - true story! at least if you meet someone in person you a) know they are same before you ask them out and b) see if they resemble someone you would vaguely be attracted to! I wouldn't want to waste weeks talking to someone only to meet them and be disappointed. keep it real people!
 
I too am doing the internet dating thingy, 30 something female same problems as all i.e where to meet somebody????
one piece of advice a friend gave me was to arrange to meet somebody quickly, don't waste time emailing & texting for weeks cos you won't find out much about them, the only sure way is too meet up pretty quick and you won't be too disappointed if they don't live up to what you have build up in your head.
I have been out on dates with two different guys so far & while nothing came of either I reckon its almost practice too, been off dating scence for a while so takes time to get back into the swing of it.
 
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tink said:
Internet dating scares me! My cousin met an American mormon on the Internet when he was 25 he ended up marriedin Utah and caught her arranging an internet hook up less than a year later - true story! at least if you meet someone in person you a) know they are same before you ask them out and b) see if they resemble someone you would vaguely be attracted to! I wouldn't want to waste weeks talking to someone only to meet them and be disappointed. keep it real people!
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I dont see how the internet is a factor in the mormon Utah story? Surely that could have happened no matter how they met?

I disagree that you know people are sane before they ask you out just because youve met them in person - mostly (in my experience anyway) the crazies give the appearance of sane the first few times you meet them.

The looks thing I agree to some extent - but beer goggles do come into play here as well and plenty of people agree to dates with people theyd never date if they were asked while sober. At least with internet dating you are actually making your decisions while sober!!!

Id never waste weeks talking online before meeting someone - as Birdy says, the only sure way is top meet up pretty quick, so you dont invest loads of time and emotional energy.

Birdy - I loved the 'practice' comment - so true!
 
To be fair, everyone has there bad date storys, me being no exception but you learn from them. I have done everything from having 2 much to drink to combat nerves and then forgetting my dates name to falling asleep and drooling on a dates shoulder in the cinema, i have been informed that is not sexy !! Whoops !!
 
Holtend82 said:
To be fair, everyone has there bad date storys, me being no exception but you learn from them. I have done everything from having 2 much to drink to combat nerves and then forgetting my dates name to falling asleep and drooling on a dates shoulder in the cinema, i have been informed that is not sexy !! Whoops !!
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The bad ones teach you what you DONT want in a partner, like shoulder droolers ;)
 
Well I haven't met any divorced american Mormons 10 years older than me looking for love in the places I hang out - put it that way! I'm just not a fan of Internet dating I like to see someone and get a good vibe before I agree to go on a date and it's always worked for me! Each to their own...
 
tink said:
Well I haven't met any divorced american Mormons 10 years older than me looking for love in the places I hang out - put it that way! I'm just not a fan of Internet dating I like to see someone and get a good vibe before I agree to go on a date and it's always worked for me! Each to their own...
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Maybe you need to hang out in more interesting places ;)

I did meet a divorced american university lecturer in his 50s (when I was in my 20s), with a long white ponytail who wanted me to come to his house by the sea and drink wine and listen to the Bee Gees. I declined...... :)
 
Truthseeked, i dont think he just wanted to drink wine and listen to Bee Gees ;)
Thats the kind of stuff we say !!
 
truthseeker said:
I did meet a divorced american university lecturer in his 50s (when I was in my 20s), with a long white ponytail who wanted me to come to his house by the sea and drink wine and listen to the Bee Gees. I declined...... :)
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I can think of much worse ways to spend your days.

TBH, I'd nearly take that offer up.
 
Caveat said:
I can think of much worse ways to spend your days.

TBH, I'd nearly take that offer up.
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He was lovely, very intelligent, cultured, handsome as well. It was just the age difference put me off, he was more than 30 years older than me.
Sure I was just young and silly then.
 
By the sounds of it we could have our own dating forum here on aam !

I do think when you have been out of the dating scence for a while, it takes a while to get into it. the nerves, anticipation etc are all part of it too.
 
birdy said:
By the sounds of it we could have our own dating forum here on aam !

I do think when you have been out of the dating scence for a while, it takes a while to get into it. the nerves, anticipation etc are all part of it too.
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Not to mention the fact that when you get that little bit older (30's+) that you feel less inclined to put up with any messers! One strike and they are out!
 
but I love the beegees what stopped you truthseeker LOL?! I do think guys in Ireland have stopped asking girls out much as they used to. On my last trip to new York I got asked out twice while out and about during the day which never has happened me here. I think it's a real shame people don't seize the moment here too when they see someone they like. I think we Irish have a 'safe zone' where we won't put ourselves out there unless we are sure we won't get a knock back.
 
Im with MandaC on the one strike rule - we dont have time to be messing when we get older!!!

Youre dead right Tink, same happened me in both Australia and America in the past, people would ask for a date in a bookstore or even the supermarket. In Ireland people are not nearly so brave - it must be a cultural thing.

Judging by the amount of threads I see on boards.ie on the subject there are plenty of guys out there who see a girl they like the look of and instead of seizing the moment they agonise over whether or not its ok to ask her out - cos they dont want to look stupid or get a knock back.

So the message of the day from Truthseeker is this:
Ask!!!!! Stop wimping out, ask for a date, the worst that can happen is the girl will say no.

And that goes for the ladies too :)
 
As someone who is happily "partnered", I feel sad for all the people I come across (male and female) who seem to have trouble hooking up with the right person.
I know lots of very nice single women and guys, most of whom would make a big difference to someone's life, but they just seem unable to meet their ideal partner. In fact, most of them have stories like those posted here -- horror stories of people they met in bars or on the internet.
I've been single a couple of times for brief periods, and I know that I much prefer to be in a long-term relationship. Although there are benefits to the single life, such as the total freedom to come and go as you please, I personally prefer to be "hitched."
My question to the other posters is this. How do I, as an observer, offer to any of my single friends to introduce them to someone that I think would be good for them? I have always avoided doing this, in case it might be taken up as coming from a "smug married", or that it might infer that they were unhappy with their status. I just think that it is a pity that so many people are failing to connect, but I don't want to be an interfering busybody!
 
If somebody is out & about, going on dates then that girl is definatly open to meeting anybody, so if you thought you could fix them up,I don't think they would take any offence at all.
I know I wouldn't, all assistance greatfully recieved!! If you know a single male, mid 30's & tall send this way!!!!
 
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