Why don't you do a programme on good customer service, it would be a lot easier!
My best (worst) one was also quite funny, happened a couple of weeks ago. Had a call from a guy from Calor Gas, they were surveying customers to see if they had their details right (or something like that). The guy was from Norn Iron, working in a call centre, but he wasn't foreign, just thick. Asked me the name of the town where my supply was, then asked me to spell it. Then asked the county (one of the easy ones) and again asked me to spell it. I had to repeat the spelling a few times; he was getting it wrong. When I said to him that he didn't seem too well up on the names of Irish counties, he told me he never heard of it. Checked him on another county, another easy one, he never heard of it either. I hung up at that stage.
Peanuts and monkeys, that's why we have problems.