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While I would never recommend that anybody who is demoralised, down or - especially - depressed (if you actually mean that literally above) act rashly in a situation which is not to their liking I think that you really need to sit down and weigh up the pros (e.g. experience) and cons (e.g. the fact that the situation is demoralising you, your brother's treatment of you etc.) of the situation and decide whether or not it is worth sticking with it. If it is (and maybe even if it's not) then you might want to consider raising the perceived problems in a calm, mature and reasonable way with your brother and try to arrive at some consensus on how to tackle and address them. In the longer term no situation/job is worth putting up with if it causes demoralisation, stress, depression etc. and/or the situation is irretrievable.
As regards how to become a good programmer it varies quite a lot as it depends on factors such as aptitude (e.g. attention to detail, enjoyment of problem solving etc.), willingness to learn, exposure to interesting/challenging projects etc. In fact I would consider these more important than formal qualifications in most cases. It's hard to put a specific number of years on it to be honest.
Not sure if these topics are of any interest to you:
As regards how to become a good programmer it varies quite a lot as it depends on factors such as aptitude (e.g. attention to detail, enjoyment of problem solving etc.), willingness to learn, exposure to interesting/challenging projects etc. In fact I would consider these more important than formal qualifications in most cases. It's hard to put a specific number of years on it to be honest.
Not sure if these topics are of any interest to you: