Dating in 2010 at the age of 40

Playing games is childish!

Treat him like you would treat an adult. You should have replied to his text.

Text him if you are interested..
 
If I was that guy, I had texted you Monday morning and you hadn't bothered your a**e replying to me by this time on a Wednesday afternoon, well then I would presume there was no interest from your side and forget it. :D
 
Na what you do is, try and get into his voicemail and see if anyone else has been calling him. Then see if he is on facebook and look at his photos and friends, also try to become friends with one of his friends etc to see their photos of him. Did he tell you where he worked? check that out too, a quick driveby at around 5pm and you will see him leaving, then follow him home, check out his house, make sure he's not married etc. See what car is like i.e has he got money. Google him and his number to make sure there's nothing dodge online so when you've done all that and about two weeks have passed text him!


......... or you could ignore all the silly games people play, text him and ask him to go for a coffee one of the days this week - don't over think things too much and don't listen to silly girl friends who get their dating tips from Sex & The City!
 
ney001 said:
Na what you do is, try and get into his voicemail and see if anyone else has been calling him. Then see if he is on facebook and look at his photos and friends, also try to become friends with one of his friends etc to see their photos of him. Did he tell you where he worked? check that out too, a quick driveby at around 5pm and you will see him leaving, then follow him home, check out his house, make sure he's not married etc. See what car is like i.e has he got money. Google him and his number to make sure there's nothing dodge online so when you've done all that and about two weeks have passed text him!
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+1

Also, try breaking into his house and checking through his drawers. Maybe go to the bedroom and try on some of his clothes. If he arrives home and catches you in the act and loses the head, he's obviously wrong for you.
 
And the bins, don't forget them, you can tell an awful lot about somebody by the yoghurt they eat!
 
TarfHead said:
+1

Also, try breaking into his house and checking through his drawers. Maybe go to the bedroom and try on some of his clothes. If he arrives home and catches you in the act and loses the head, he's obviously wrong for you.
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Or, maybe he likes a bitta role play?
 
Thanks lads the last few replies have me smiling anyway. I don't do FB, don't know where he lives or works (he's self employed) so trying on his clothes and rooting though his bins aren't options despite how appealing they sound. If I was to root through his bins what would I be looking for exactly?

RMFC - re your comment on me being bothered about being single at 40 I can honestly say it doesn't bother me cos if it did I wouldn't be single. I'm not being big headed but friends say I'm too fussy and my reply is "yea I know". This reply normally doesn't go down well but should you not be fussy about this?

I mentioned the age to put some context on it I suppose.

Some posters seem to think I didn't reply but I did once. At 40 I of an age that wouldn't be a big fan of having a texting conversation.
 
RMCF said:
Yeah give him a call and have a chat. Maybe about Cowen, lighten the mood !!!
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This one also has the advantage that if he gets offended you'll know he's actually a Cowen/Joe Duffy fan-boy you don't need to waste any more time on him
 
becky said:
Thanks lads the last few replies have me smiling anyway. I don't do FB, don't know where he lives or works (he's self employed) so trying on his clothes and rooting though his bins aren't options despite how appealing they sound. If I was to root through his bins what would I be looking for exactly?

RMFC - re your comment on me being bothered about being single at 40 I can honestly say it doesn't bother me cos if it did I wouldn't be single. I'm not being big headed but friends say I'm too fussy and my reply is "yea I know". This reply normally doesn't go down well but should you not be fussy about this?

I mentioned the age to put some context on it I suppose.

Some posters seem to think I didn't reply but I did once. At 40 I of an age that wouldn't be a big fan of having a texting conversation.
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I would assume RMFC only mentioned your age because you mentioned it yourself. You should be fussy. I'm a very fussy person. This is someone who you may spend quite a lot of your time with so choose wisely. There's no point getting together with the first person that comes along and winding up miserable just because you didn't want to seem fussy.

He texted you, you texted him back, he texted you again, you didn't reply, I'm assuming that's where people are getting the idea you didn't reply.

You don't need to have a text conversation, call him. Call him later on this evening at a time when it should be safe enough (he won't be in work or travelling from work). If he's busy when you call or you have to leave a voicemail just suggest he call you back to arrange meeting up over the weekend if he's not busy, simple.
 
How many men does it take to open a bottle of Budweiser ?
None. The bitch should have it opened when she brings it to him.


Quit playing the teenage games and listening to your " friends "

Get back to him for a chat and see where it goes from there
 
being in the same age group and currently single i'd be a bit annoyed if I hadn't received a response by today to a text on monday.
 
I did only mention your age because you mentioned it - I wasn't hinting at you being desperate or anything. Sorry if it came across this way.

So, have you called him yet?
 
Caveat said:
Worst advice ever.

Sorry, but I hate when people (mainly women) say this. Might be relevant when you're 16 or something but playing hard to get and other game playing is just ridiculous after the age of e.g. 25.

If 40 odd years on this planet has taught me anything it's that men are generally far less calculating and devious than some women think they are. They tend to be much more matter of fact and blunt in "affairs of the heart" especially at this age.

Just be honest with both yourself and him - employ common sense though and try to be level headed but forget the second guessing and skirting around is my advice.
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Best advice so far.
 
Just ring him and arrange to meet for a coffee on your lunch hour, that gives you a bit of time to decide if you want to take it further while having a good reason to head off if you don't.

He took your number and texted you twice, if he wasn't interested why would he bother? Don't play silly games, you might regret it. If you don't want to take it further after another date just say so.


"Be bold and courageous. When you look back on your life, you'll regret the things you didn't do more than the ones you did." H. Jackson Brown, Jr.
 
What's with all this texting-ping-pong-crap? Somebody has to make the first move here and it's better thro' a phone call. Might as well be you who makes it. He definitely won't think any less of you for being the one to call! I'd agree with the 'Shure if I was waiting around for you to call me...' approach. You're both adults afterall. Keep the conversation short, sweet and light-hearted. He'll be mad for it!

Spoken by a 39 year-old, 6 years married male with 2 kids who really was put thro' the mill by his now wife with flippin' text messages. In my instance I cracked and phoned her up with something very romantic like 'Let's cut the crap, go out on a date and see how it goes'. We did know each other for a few years though so I could be that blunt with her! Yikes! Now she spends most of her time being blunt with me and I pretend to like it! :D
 
It's a really interesting thread because it shows how the whole dating thing is bloody difficult if you are aged 15 or 40! Amazing how we all or at least most of have the same insecurities. If you like him, get in touch. Best of luck. If you get married, we should have an askaboutmoney themed wedding!
 
Becky, I am a fussy (single) 40 year old too!

Sometimes the older you get, the more set in your ways you get and not always in a good way. My last relationship ended horribly about 3 years ago and I have not been out on a date since. It is only in the past year that perhaps I am ready to start again. I am extremely fussy (the last guy who told me he would take me to dinner for something exotic- "I'd even eat one of them Spagetti Bologneses)" was not for me.

A single friend of mine has recently met someone at age 54 and she is over the moon, both of them are.

I would not be into the text him, don't text him rubbish, I honestly could not get into that again, first sign of that messin' and I would be off, that is probably why I don't bother at this stage.

Like some of the other posters, I would not be happy to get a reply to Monday's text today and would think, " not interested, byeee!"

Keep us updated.....
 
Well becky, I'm mad to know did you call/txt him????

I could hardly sleep last night in anticipation of your answer:)
 
Hi Becky,

As a happily married man I've been out of the dating game for yonks. However, as he sent the last text, I would be expecting a text back if I were him or I would think that you're not interested. Tell him you'll be "in town" on Sat and would he fancy a coffee? Why not - as Caveat pointed our, neither of ye are 16. Go for it!!
 
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