Cohabiting Redress

D

Dairylea

Registered User
Messages
44
My long term cohabiting partner and I have recently split up after 10 years. We have a young child together. For the last few years he was breadwinner while I was homemaker.

During our relationship he has built up considerable wealth and cleared his mortgage on the family home while I have given up earnings and raised the family while he concentrated on his career. All assets are in his name. At the moment myself and child remain in his house (family home) and he has moved out.

He wants me and child to move out and claim homeless so he can move back into the family home on his own. He does have another investment property and more.

I’m aware that I do have rights under the redress scheme because I was a financially dependant cohabitant. Can anyone shed some light on this? What are the courts likely to award? I’d like to try Mediation before going down the court route but I’d like to know what the court is likely to offer as a solution. Would it be much the same as a married couple?

My main concern is a roof over our head and continuity for child. I am currently waiting on legal aid. Many thanks for any input on this matter.
 
I believe you have very similar rights than to a married couple

Redress scheme for cohabiting couples

What is the redress scheme for cohabitants and who qualifies?
www.citizensinformation.ie
The number one priority would be that the child is housed and provided for, so would be surprised if he could force you to go, but I'm no expert on this.
Another matter is what kind of person you are dealing with, that wants to make their own child homeless...
 
Bilbo1 said:
Another matter is what kind of person you are dealing with, that wants to make their own child homeless...
Click to expand...
Thank you for your reply. Yes it has been quite an eye opener. The split was not my choice either. Blindsided would be the word.
 
I’d like to give update to my situation for anyone who may go through the same or is curious. We eventually got a court date in March 2024. We settled out of court just before the hearing and agreed to me and the children remaining in the house until the youngest is 18. He will pay no child maintenance. My Solicitor urged to go into court and not accept his offer but the barrister advised that it was a good deal since there were no rent/mortgage payments and the courts decision may not be as good. It was a very hard decision to make but keeping a roof over our head was more important than anything so I took the offer. My solicitor has advised that child maintenance could be revisited if I change my mind in future. I’m not sure. I’ve now found a full time job that allows me to work from home 3days a week and I have after school care for the other two days. I have asked childs father to pay for one of those days since it’s a day he is scheduled to have child but he doesn’t actually take him. At this stage he has refused to help with childcare costs but hopefully that changes. I now have 8years to save as much as possible so that I can navigate my living arrangements once the youngest is 18. I am relieved to be through the ordeal now and life is starting again. It has been incredibly stressful and lessons have been learned.
 
Well done and thanks for the update.

The system is crazy that you are faced with a big gamble that the judge may arbitrarily give you a worse deal or a much better deal.

There should be guidelines so that both sides have an idea of what the judge may grant.

You could not afford to take the gamble, so you made the right decision.

He could well afford to take the gamble as he could afford any loss.

Brendan
 
Well done. I would keep asking for financial help from the dad with reasons why the help is needed. Keep track of the requests. It might come in useful if you revisit the matter. It feels wrong that you are not being considered in all this and that the sole focus is the children. Good luck with your savings plan for the future.
 
Sounds like he wants to make you and his child homeless in order to claim maximum benefits from the state.

And I have heard of people doing this before, moving to a hostel or refuge even in order to establish homelessness.

Despicable behaviour, especially for someone who is financially secure.

Sounds like you have a solution for now but while it’s great to have the house sorted for now kids are expensive and 18 is very young to have to be self sufficient.
 
It sounds like you were lucky, in the end, to get out of that relationship. What a despicable sounding person he is. Best of luck with everything.
 
Hi Dairylea
Glad to see you came back to update on your situation
I suspect you can now go back for Child Maintenance sooner the better,
I had an Niece in a similar position to you but further along the line breakup in 2016 still ongoing until 2020, again he moved back in with his parents 2016 house in his name, her family solicitor saying cohabiting redress not the same as a marriage cert when you drill down into the fine details,
Solicitor was advising her to go on the housing register stating she was being made homeless which she did back in 2016,do a deal to move out her friends were advising her not to move out of house and stay put,
Her solicitor advice was to make it known she would move provided a deal was on the table
The upshot was she did get a house, she also got a deal for moving out and is well on her way to owning her own place as I post,

The problem she has was if she stayed put her youngest was one year old by the time her youngest was 23
her age would be against her for a mortgage and there would be no deal for moving out,

Better to get max child Maintenance, he was willing to agree child care cost and help out where possible,

The thinking is he did not like the Idea of his children mother moving a new partner into his house with his children and was open to give her a good deal to move out,
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Menu
Log in
Register