Are You Happy...?

due to depression i spent years at about 1 or 2. But recently i'm about 6, depression gone and just married so suppose i'm happier than i've ever been.
 
Newbie! said:
Generally a 7-8.

Honestly (and this is pathetic), I sometimes read threads here and I feel jealous of some peoples earnings and low mortgages and general good wealth. I really do try to be grateful and happy to be in a good relationship, have both our families healthy, safe and happy, have our own home and both have jobs. I did say it was pathetic.....!
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Life is 10% what happens to you and 90% how you react to it.
 
Interesting question, and something I have thought about recently- suppose I would sit somewhere between a 4 and and a 7 at the moment.

Just watching "Reeling in the Years" the other night - about Italia '90. Watching back the footage, the one thing that dawned on me was how happy I was during that Summer. Not about any one thing, just a very very happy time postive time. Hit me like a ton of bricks actually.
 
A 9 on the days when I'm aware of just how lucky I am to have what I have.

About a 5/6 on the days I get jealous of what other people have, but I soon snap out of that.

I think its difficult to be on a high all the time but I really do feel very content right now.
 
7 - 8. People are in control of their attitudes. If you want to be angry - go for it. If you want to be sad - ditto. You learn from life that it is a far better proposition smiling, rather than scowling. As the bould Abe Lincoln said "Most people are about as happy as they make up their minds to be". Oops! On reading this, I realise that he said 'most'. So, for the few not included - chill - if you want to and don't chill if ..................... .:);)
 
MandaC said:
the one thing that dawned on me was how happy I was during that Summer. Not about any one thing, just a very very happy time postive time.
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Are you sure it wasn't just simply naivety? Less responsibilities, ignorance is bliss etc?
 
Caveat said:
Are you sure it wasn't just simply naivety? Less responsibilities, ignorance is bliss etc?
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Yeah, definitely a lot of that without a doubt but definitely the happiest period in my life. 21st that year and all that. Got a shock remembering how carefree I used to be!
 
People are in control of their attitudes. If you want to be angry - go for it. If you want to be sad - ditto.
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People don't always choose to be sad (though I will admit some do bring it on themselves).

I would have also gone through a stage where I probably would have said 2-4....very down & sad for NO LOGICAL reason, which was made it particularly frustrating. I could recognise I had a wonderful family, no health issues, relatively few financial issues etc. Actually, the fact I had so little to feel bad about, made me feel worse (I said it's not logical). But I couldn't stop crying & feeling down! Lasted about 2 months on 2 occassions. Horrible, horrible time.

But worked through it I'm fine now & probably would go for 7-8.
 
Caveat said:
Are you sure it wasn't just simply naivety? Less responsibilities, ignorance is bliss etc?
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I'm am far happier now than I was 20 years ago. Being an adult means that you have more responsibilities and pressures but it also means that you have control over your life and freedom to make your own decisions. Basically your happiness is up to you.
 
Here's a review of a book I discovered recently. Found it very interesting. See what you think. ​
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Authentic Happiness – Martin E.P. Seligman​
Authentic Happiness is based on the Positive Psychology movement, or the idea that psychologists should be helping people feel more happy rather than simply less unhappy. Well-respected psychologist Seligman has a gift for taking years of psychology research and breaking it down into readable yet still compelling evidence to support his theories. He begins with reviewing the components that can affect happiness and how we can work to change these factors with respect to our past, present, and future.

The meat of the book, however, lies in Seligman's notion of Signature Strengths, which he views as keys to more lasting fulfillment. Seligman focuses in particular on how to enhance your signature strengths in the areas of love, work, and raising your children (based on many examples from his own child-rearing experiences). He concludes the book by shifting into a slightly more spiritual perspective to discuss attaining a sense of meaning and purpose in life.

While bookshelves overflow with subjective and conflicting advice on happiness, Seligman offers a refreshingly scientific approach. Happiness can be explained by three key components:
S: your homeostasis
C: changes based on circumstance
V: changes based on voluntary action and thoughts

He explains that if you want to lastingly raise your level of happiness by changing the external circumstances of your life, you should do the following:
Live in a wealthy democracy, not in an impoverished dictatorship (a
strong effect)
Get married (a robust effect, but perhaps not causal)
Avoid negative events and negative emotion (only a moderat
effect)
Acquire a rich social network (a robust effect, but perhaps no
causal)
Get religion (a moderate effect)

If you want to lastingly raise your level of happiness by "internally" changing your thoughts and actions, pursue:
A sense of ownership and authenticity ("This is the real me")
A feeling of excitement while displaying it, particularly at first
A rapid learning curve as a strength is first practiced
Continuous learning of new ways to enact the strength
A sense of yearning to find ways to use it
A feeling of inevitability in using the strength ("Try and stop me")
Invigoration rather than exhaustion while using the strength
The creation and pursuit of personal projects that revolve around it
Joy, zest, enthusiasm, even ecstasy while using it


 
sam h said:
People don't always choose to be sad (though I will admit some do bring it on themselves).
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It's an interesting point. An Austrian psychiatrist, Viktor Frankl, who was unlucky enough to have been condemned to the concentration camps in WW 2, but lucky enough to survive, wrote a book about the very concept of that choice you mention, based on his experiences there, and his observations of those who survived. The book is http://www.amazon.com/Mans-Search-Meaning-Viktor-Frankl/dp/0671023373 ("Man's Search For Meaning") and it is well worth reading; dark, but elevating and remarkable. It was voted one of America's ten most influential books by the US Library of Congress.

He went on to become Chief of Neurology in the Policlinic Hospital in Vienna, and used his theories to develop a succesful technique for treating patients who were suffering a variety of neurosis, by helping them to find the real purpose in their lives.

Here's a quote from the book...

"Fundamentally, therefore, any man can, even under such circumstances, decide what shall become of him - mentally and spiritually. He may retain his human dignity even in a concentration camp."
 
sam h said:
People don't always choose to be sad (though I will admit some do bring it on themselves).

I would have also gone through a stage where I probably would have said 2-4....very down & sad for NO LOGICAL reason, which was made it particularly frustrating. I could recognise I had a wonderful family, no health issues, relatively few financial issues etc. Actually, the fact I had so little to feel bad about, made me feel worse (I said it's not logical). But I couldn't stop crying & feeling down! Lasted about 2 months on 2 occassions. Horrible, horrible time.

But worked through it I'm fine now & probably would go for 7-8.
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Good for you sam h! Get stuck in the happy groove.:) Bobby (Somethingorother) years ago sang Don't Worry - Be Happy. Perhaps a soppy song but it got the jist of life.
 
Simeon said:
Good for you sam h! Get stuck in the happy groove.:) Bobby (Somethingorother) years ago sang Don't Worry - Be Happy. Perhaps a soppy song but it got the jist of life.
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God that brings me back. I had a crush on a boy on my school bus and that song was constantly playing on the bus radio so I always associate it with that period.
 
Social Life - 8
Family/Relationship/Friends - 9
Work - 2 or 3
Money - 7
Health - 9

I'm not sure what the overall number would be. I'm in work now so I'm about a 3 but this evening I'll be a 7 and Friday evening I'll be a 9.
 
Social Life - 7 [young kids ... would like to be out a bit more]

Family/Relationship/Friends - 9 [good marriage, young kids, 4 grandparents, good pals]

Work - 7 [see this going down probably to a 5 with current economic climate]

Money - 7 [would love more but not many wouldn't]

Health - 7 [hopefully this goes up to about 8.5 next week on summer hols]
 
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