Before you go to your solicitor you should write down everything you have paid and are currently paying. Also write down what your ex contributed. That's a good place to start. You also should have a list of all you own (property, deposits, cars), loans outstanding etc. Your own montly outgoings (rent, heat etc). If you did it all up in excel or somesuch it might make it easier to go through the figures. To be fair I'm guessing the dole doesn't pay a lot and bringing up kids is costly. Being amicable, as you seem to be is very helpfull, but be aware the other side may not be. That's the nature of relationships. But you do seem to be paying for everything. Incidentally you did not need to transfer all the bills into your name to protect your credit rating, you could have transferred them out of your name but don't do anything now until you have spoken to your solicitor. When separated, with kids, it's more normal that one side pays maintenance to the other who then pays their own bills out of that plus whatever income they have. The care and happiness of the child is the important thing here and amicable parents in a tricky situation can go a long way towards this.