Funny Story

L

Lex Foutish

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Barack Obama meets with the Queen of
England.

He asks her, "Your Majesty, how do you run such an efficient
government? Are there any tips you can give to me?"

"Well," says the Queen, "the most important thing is to surround yourself with intelligent people."

Obama frowns. "But how do I know the people around me are
really intelligent?"

The Queen takes a sip of tea. "Oh, that's easy. You just ask them
to answer an intelligent riddle."

The Queen pushes a button on her intercom. "Please send Gordon Brown
in here, would you?"

Prime Minister, Gordon Brown, walks into the room. "Yes, my Queen?"

The Queen smiles. "Answer me this, please, Gordon. Your mother and
father have a child. It is not your brother and it is not your sister.
Who is it?"

Without pausing for a moment, Gordon Brown answers, "That would be me."

"Yes! Very good," says the Queen.

Obama goes back home to ask Joe Biden, his Vice President, the same
question.

"Joe. Answer this for me. Your mother and your father have a child. It's
not your brother and it's not your sister. Who is it?"

"I'm not sure," says Biden. "Let me get back to you on that
one." He goes to his advisors and asks every one, but none can give him an answer.

Finally, he ends up in the men's room and recognizes Colin Powell's
shoes in the next stall.

Biden asks Powell, "Colin! Can you answer this for me? Your mother
and father have a child and it's not your brother or your sister. Who is
it?"

Colin Powell yells back, "That's easy. It's me!"

Biden smiles, and says, "Thanks!" Then, he goes back to speak with
Obama.

"Say, I did some research and I have the answer to that riddle. It's Colin
Powell."

Obama gets up, stomps over to Biden, and angrily yells into his face,
"No, you idiot! It's Gordon Brown!"
 
Truly awful

You my friend have out done yourself

Merry Xmas to your and yours
 
Thank you, my good buddy! And a Merry Christmas to all your fellow inhabitants of the town you call Dublin. Have you noticed that you're the only other sad git on here with me on Christmas Eve..............? :eek:

We need to get out more! :D

Two pints of Beamish please, Barman. And S.L.F., are you having a drink? :D
 
Lex Foutish said:
Thank you, my good buddy! And a Merry Christmas to all your fellow inhabitants of the town you call Dublin. Have you noticed that you're the only other sad git on here with me on Christmas Eve..............? :eek:

We need to get out more! :D

Two pints of Beamish please, Barman. And S.L.F., are you having a drink? :D
Click to expand...

Since you are putting your hand in your pocket (finally) I'll have a Guinness and a Baileys please.
 
S.L.F said:
Since you are putting your hand in your pocket (finally) I'll have a Guinness and a Baileys please.
Click to expand...

And I suppose you want ice in the Bailey's as well! God dammit! You always manage to catch me when it's my round! :( I'm in Dublin now. Barman, how much is ice? ;)
 
Lex Foutish said:
And I suppose you want ice in the Bailey's as well! God dammit! You always manage to catch me when it's my round! :( I'm in Dublin now. Barman, how much is ice? ;)
Click to expand...

The reason it is so expensive to drink in Dublin is because all the publicans are from the country, and those shisters know how to charge.
 
S.L.F said:
The reason it is so expensive to drink in Dublin is because all the publicans are from the country, and those shisters know how to charge.
Click to expand...

And they put up the price of the pint an hour before the last train leaves for Cork. You're dead right about those scum bags from the country! Thanks be to God, none of them live in Cork..... ;)
 
E-mails are great for showing up what is originally posted

Lex Foutish said:
And they put up the price of the pint an hour before the last train leaves for Cork. You're dead right about those scum bags from the country! Thanks be to God, none of them live in Cork..... ;)
Click to expand...

The red bit was added after.

Just shows he had to think about it first.
 
Speaking of ice I,m not sure who said this.
There is a fair distribution of ice between the rich and the poor.

The rich get it in the Summer and the poor get it in the Winter
 
You don't want ice in the Baileys according to MrsK. What you really want is a large brandy in it.
 
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