I would consider setting up a new political party- " Ar Fúm Féin " roughly translated " All about me " . I will only respond to strikes, disputes or personal tragedies when its only in my interest.
Those who vote for me had nothing to do with getting the country into this mess, its not our fault so why should we pay. I will bring in Tax incentives of all kind for anybody that votes for me and tax the hell out of those evil bankers and developers.
My Slogan "Its not my fault, so Im not going to pay" . .
I will choose to ignore the basic elements of economics that we need to survive in a capitalist regime, prefering to introduce populist legislation that will make my voters feel happy in themselves, but that could potentially ruin the countrys chances of getting foreign assistance in propping us back up.
-Lambast FF. This is a no brainer.
- Nationalise everybodys personal debt. Personal responsibility for ones actions is overrated . Why nationalise the banks when you can offer everybody a get out of debt free card. Sure to hell how it doesnt help the economy in anyway but to let our banks collapse and our credit rating abroad dissapear completely. Sure it was nobodys fault that they bought a house, car or holiday that they cant actually afford to service now. It was all the banks and the previous governments fault for completely fooling us into thinking we were living in a perfect society. It was up to them to tell us what to do and they told us the wrong things . .
- Raise corporation tax (We dont want those rich companies getting things cheaply here, they wouldnt dare move out!).
- Take only the good bits of the banks (as per George Lee, Im no economist but this seems completely impossible, but sure its a popular idea so lets run with it) . .
- Nobody should get a paycut. Who wont vote for that beauty! Ignore internal and external economic problems this will cause. Bankers, builders and unpopular politicans should have to spend at least one day a week in a gallows where people can throw rotten vegetables at them. They cannot be paid until they have performed these duties and even after that, they will be taxed so much they will barely be able to afford the bus home to one of their houses.
- Never say it like I see it. To say such derogatory things like "some people in Ireland are really going over the top in some of their opinions on the economy" is only losing potential votes, instead massage their egos with such wonderful phrases like "you deserve better" (and snigger only to yourself, your not promising them anything better, just saying that people deserve better!) or "I totally disagree with the other partys way of doing things"(without actually suggesting a much better alternative that anybody has confidence in).
-As soon as Im elected in I will automatically say that things will be tough and sure any mistakes I make will be on the back of FF and that among other great faults they have, its their fault that marathon changed its name to snickers (and bulmers changed to magners).
-Always pick one side over the other. Its not possible to actually take in everybodys viewpoint or ideas. If you do you might actually make the right decisions, but the media will make you look indecisive and a weak leader. As such always go to one side and use Spin to get a majority of the public on your side. If it gets out your spending big money on spin doctors, hire more spin doctors to convince people otherwise.
- Always work off decisions that benefit you. You have two options on your table, one is popular among the public but will end up costing alot more then you can afford. The other is very unpopular but will help the longer term stability of the country. No brainer, look at a few opinion poles and get your advisers to give you info that makes that decision work . .
I will post more of my parties stance on topics as the mood of the nation changes . . . .
I am here for myself, to serve myself and to prop up myself at any cost.
I will stop at nothing to improve my personal standing in society . . .
Ladies and Gentlemen I give you " Ar Fúm Féin "