What is Important in your Life?

Waking up each morning (beats the alternative)
My current wife (she hates that)
Beating standard scratch (a never ending mission)
Children (particularly being off the payroll)
Grandchildren (my reward for not strangling my children)
Friends (well, most of them)
Being busy (but not too busy)
 
I've never actually been diagnosed as on the autism spectrum.
But I reckon I must have got a touch of it.
I love people ... but they drain my batteries quickly.
I think that's the definition of an introvert.
I like solitude -- lots of it.
After time spent with friends I want nothing more than to crawl into bed with my beloved ... computer.

The most beautiful thing in the world is a warm night with a clear sky.
Or a cold night with a clear sky. As long as there are stars.
Lying on your back under a dark sky is terrifying, mystifying, exhilarating.
I have recurring dreams of falling into that endless blackness, among the friendly stars.

I've been in love with stars for more than forty years. They are as individual as people.
Tonight I see Orion the Hunter marching across the rooftops, as he does every year at this time.
His right knee is a monster, two dozen times more massive than our Sun and a quarter of a million times brighter.
His left shoulder is a glutton, in the mode of Erysichthon of Thessaly who purportedly ate himself. Compared to our Sun this star is 500 times younger and 500 times larger. It has already consumed itself in a great act of autophagy, on its way to an early grave. It will go out with a mighty bang any day now and, when it does, any inhabited planet within a thousand trillion miles will be sterilised of all life by the blast. We're fortunate enough to be outside the kill zone, but close enough to get a ringside view.

Those are just two of the two hundred billion stars in our galaxy.
Surely no subject could be more fascinating?
That's why I once ran an office poll along the lines of:
How much of your day do you spend contemplating "life, the universe and everything" versus "other stuff".​
Best/worst answer (this is not a joke):
"I spend most of the time wondering if I have enough make-up to get me through the day".​
This made me realise I might be a little out of touch.
But, then, I knew that.
 
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I think for me the most important thing in life is to enjoy it and to enjoy it the way you want to enjoy it and not the way other people think you should be enjoying it
Life is short, there is no right way or wrong way per se but when the time comes and I have to look back at what I've done, I don't want to have regrets, I don't mind mistakes but want little or no regrets
As Frank Sinatra sings " And now, the end is near....."
 
Cervelo said:
when the time comes and I have to look back at what I've done,
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I have always failed to understand this logic.

It is during my life that I want to look at what I have done and am doing. I have no real interest in the potential opinions of the maudlin old man I hope to become someday.

The priorities and judgements of some random old person (even if it is your future self) should have no influence on your life.
 
Your life is the whole of your life to enjoy; not just the here and now.

When you are older, you will still be you but enriched by more life experiences.

You will not turn into someone else.
 

I can only speak for myself (obviously) but I think the or at least my understanding of the "logic" is at the beginning of the sentence "Life is short"
Sorry to bring the tone of the conversation down but ask yourself, if you got the worst news a person can get what would you think about, what's important to you and what would you regret ??
 
Cervelo said:
what's important to you and what would you regret ??
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An Australian palliative care nurse asked dying patients about regrets and these were the top 5.

"All of the men I nursed deeply regretted spending so much of their lives on the treadmill of a work existence"
 
Cervelo said:
but ask yourself, if you got the worst news a person can get what would you think about, what's important to you and what would you regret ??
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It would be idiotic to spend your life this way. I didn't get the worst news a person can get today, and I am not going to live my life as if that possibility held some special significance.

michaelm said:
"All of the men I nursed deeply regretted spending so much of their lives on the treadmill of a work existence"
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They may have regretted it when they were old, but that is just maudlin bunk.

If you think that you spent too much of your time last week on the treadmill of work, do something about it next week. Identify the reasons why you misspent your time last week, you may well come to the conclusion that you put in a good week last week.

When you are old and have forgotten the temptations and imperatives that drive you to take the decisions you do now, your second guessing of your choices now will be irrelevant.

I like to contemplate the fact that I am going to die someday for about 5 minutes approximately weekly, then I get on with living.
 
cremeegg said:
They may have regretted it when they were old, but that is just maudlin bunk.
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If she had said 'many' or 'most' it would sound credible. That she says 'All' points to maudlin bunk, as you say. I do think that many have a work/life balance that's out of kilter and some may not realise it until their dotage.
 
michaelm said:
I do think that many have a work/life balance that's out of kilter and some may not realise it until their dotage.
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I think even more fail to make good use of their down time, and it's easier after the fact to blame it on too much time working rather than accept your own part in failing to get off the sofa.
 
Leo said:
I think even more fail to make good use of their down time, and it's easier after the fact to blame it on too much time working rather than accept your own part in failing to get off the sofa.
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Yep, mind you I love the odd Sofa/Netflix/do nothing day.
 
Leo said:
I think even more fail to make good use of their down time
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Unless it's raining, I absolutely love sitting outside early on Saturday & Sunday mornings with a strong coffee, before everyone gets up and the chaos of bringing kids to a million activities begins!
 
"No-one ever said I wish I'd spent more time at the office". Yeah, yeah, I could have saved the planet if only that demon work wasnt there.....& other such delusions. How many people retire, have nothing to do, drive their spouse mad.

There's no denying modern work is "always on", but there is a flip side that it has never been more flexible. I haven't missed a family event and get to train teams my kids are on etc etc. If I was down the pit for 14 hours that wouldn't happen. How much are we supposed to pack into 1 life?, why do we feel the endless need to achieve more with our time? I think there's something to be said for "mindfullness", being "present in the moment" etc., I wouldnt say I'm much of a practitioner of it, but I like the theory of 'just being' every so often.
 
  • Nature - Being outdoors is so therapeutic and having the health to walk or hike or swim or cycle is such a privilege.
  • Family - The pure joy of being with people with a shared history and who get your sense of humour and can finish your sentences. No guile or effort required. To be able to truly be yourself with them.
  • Sex - there is nothing better than being pushed up against a wall and kissed hard by a man who knows what he's doing. It's good for your soul and can take your breath away
  • Children - the opportunity to love unconditionally in an all consuming, frightening way is scary but liberating.
  • Disposable income - being able to afford that red dress and those killer shoes without bouncing the mortgage. Equally - being able to buy an impromptu gift for someone apropos of nothing. Being able to throw the kids €20 to spend on whatever.
  • Dogs. Almost all dogs. Except those handbag ones, you know which ones, I mean.
 
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