The solution to our economic problems!

[Purple]

Build an airport on Spike Island and legalise the sale of hard drugs there.

Advantages:
We could charge €150 “drug tourism tax” for each person that flies.
We could make all the profit on the drugs sold (think of a vending machine with the heroin already pre-loaded into the syringe).
The flights would be very profitable for the carriers as the passengers would all be very skinny.
We wouldn’t have to let them into the country, just get them drugged up in arrivals (pre-emigration) and load them back onto the planes.
Crime rates drop since drugs can now be bought legally here.

Downside:
Getting plains with an extra 8 toilets might be a problem for the airlines.

 

[so-crates]

Sounds like it wouldn't be a particularly cash-worthy idea Purple.

Firstly, the cost to the drug-addicts would be prohibitive, so some enterprising individuals are sure to entice the addicts back by selling them drugs cheaper on the mainland, thus undermining the legal market and limiting our tax take.

Secondly, if utopia arrives and we can manage to convince all existing addicts to use only the legal arrangement on Spike Island, advertising for and engaging new addict clients would be quite reprehensible and not welcomed by the general populace so it would have only a limited lifespan.

The toilets would be the least of the issues

 

[Caveat]

Sure they would all miss their return flights.

"Whaaa' ? ... Ahhh noo .... check iiin....baaad buzz maaaan..."

 

[truthseeker]

The flights would be very profitable for the carriers as the passengers would all be very skinny.

Only the heroin addicts would be skinny, the stoners would probably be extra fat from the munchies - downside, they might fit less on the planes, upside - a lot of revenue to be made off them by selling plenty of junk food on the flights.

 

[Firefly]

Purple trying his damnest to get Cork out of the World's Top 10

 

[Purple]

Sounds like it wouldn't be a particularly cash-worthy idea Purple.

Firstly, the cost to the drug-addicts would be prohibitive, so some enterprising individuals are sure to entice the addicts back by selling them drugs cheaper on the mainland, thus undermining the legal market and limiting our tax take.

Secondly, if utopia arrives and we can manage to convince all existing addicts to use only the legal arrangement on Spike Island, advertising for and engaging new addict clients would be quite reprehensible and not welcomed by the general populace so it would have only a limited lifespan.

The toilets would be the least of the issues

It would be for foreigners (or bloody foreigners if you prefer). We'd have to price below the current market rate. Price would become an issue in the medium term but we'd make hey while the sun shines.

 

[jhegarty]

Bring them all to spike. Leave them there.

Insurance rates (or a major issue for business) will go way down.

Recession over, everyone happy.

 

[Mpsox]

Bring them all to spike. Leave them there.

Insurance rates (or a major issue for business) will go way down.

Recession over, everyone happy.

given the state of Spike, I doubt if you'd need to supply any drugs in the first place.
[broken link removed]

 

[so-crates]

It would be for foreigners (or bloody foreigners if you prefer). We'd have to price below the current market rate. Price would become an issue in the medium term but we'd make hey while the sun shines.

Direct flights from the Bronx and Skid Row to Spike Island? Somehow I think the denizens of those places wouldn't be able to afford the price of the flight and if it is for foreigners what is the benchmark for the current market rate?

Like your clever mis-spelling though

 

[gipimann]

Sure they would all miss their return flights.

"Whaaa' ? ... Ahhh noo .... check iiin....baaad buzz maaaan..."

Maybe we could get the "trolley dollys" on the planes to do the selling, so the passengers don't actually have to de-plane....so they don't miss the return flight!