Social Etiquette - Business Idea

Lads/Lasses,

Life's too short to be worrying about all these small matters worry about the important things when needs be and chill out in the meantime
 
Don't cut your bread; break it.

And only butter the piece/slice you are about to eat.

Re: eating soup: Put your spoon in the bowl and move it away from you (tilting the bowl if necessary away from you also).
 
Yea, but would you sniff your way through a bisiness meeting?

Yeah, I had to sniff my way through all aspects of life for a good few years there until the a consultant in his infinite wisdom decided to operate on me last year. Im still sniffy, but not nearly as much.
 
Don't mind all that malarky. Here's my alternative list.

Dip your bread in your soup making sure to leave some behind to mop up the last bits.
Wipe your mouth with your sleeve, it's going in the wash that night anyway and saves the hosts on having to wash napkins.
A belch after a course is a complement to the chef.
Asking if you can finish the leftovers of others is just being thoughtful, no point good food going to waste.
Let the hosts off to bed if they're looking tired, just promise you'll pull the door after you on the way out.

 

Thanks for that Mandelbrot; I'm sure with weird views like yours, you will be a certainty for entry into some forthcoming Come Dine With Me.
 
Thanks for that Mandelbrot; I'm sure with weird views like yours, you will be a certainty for entry into some forthcoming Come Dine With Me.

Equally I could say that with old-fashioned snobbish views like yours, you'd be a shoo-in for the obligatory pompous fart on the same show... it'd make for great viewing I'm sure. (Except that I wouldn't be seen dead on any form of reality TV)

Edit: Sorry, just to clarify, TV is what us young folk occasionally call the television for short these days Leper
 

just to be pedantic - it should be 'we' young folk!
 
Once again, Mandlebrot, thanks for an incisive post. One thing Lepers have in common is that they cannot afford to be snobs. But, everyone to his own . . .

Correct social behaviour is declining and worse again the main offenders dont think they are in any way short of the mark. It's like the guys wreaking in unhealthy bodily smells not being able to smell themselves while nearby others cringe with embarrassment for the 'offenders.'

Likewise, some find it acceptable to place elbows on tables while eating. OK this is not the end of the world. But, what if somebody put their feet on the table? One man's sauce is another's poison. I am not trying to make a case for Mrs Bucket (Bouquet or whatever) here, but I think we should have some kind of plimsol line that we should not descend from.

However, I reckon there is space for a nice little earner here. I dont mean somebody running into the nearest industrial estate to rent space at high rent. Rachel Khoo started a restaurant in central Paris from her one bedroom flat. Her eatery became famous and she got a television series out of her efforts which cost nearly nothing. It is the same here, somebody with a good business sense can service the upwardly mobile market quite cheaply and for a lot of gain.
 
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Try fresh Pineapple. Available in most stores at just over a €. Helps me.
 
.. I reckon there is an opening for somebody to give day/night classes on social etiquette. The subjects could include ..

Maybe something on resisting the urge to vehemently express hostile disagreement with opinions posted on a message board, especially ones in a section titled 'Shooting the Breeze' ?
 
Yeah, I had to sniff my way through all aspects of life for a good few years there until the a consultant in his infinite wisdom decided to operate on me last year. Im still sniffy, but not nearly as much.

Sorry to hear that, I'm glad things have improved.
 
Just out of interest, why do you equate proper etiquette with being snobby?

Because most of the "issues" described on here have no functional purpose other than to attempt to impose conformity for the sake of it on people. I would have thought that we live in a slightly more enlightened world now, where we can appreciate and respect the right of an individual to be individual.

I fail to see how / why anyone could be bothered by someone choosing to eat with the fork in their right hand - I suspect the existing convention was put in place as part of attempts to "correct" the behaviour of left-handed people, but may be wrong on that, if there's any etiquette historians who can enlighten me?

To me, pointless etiquette like cutlery etiquette is indicative of the same behaviours that lead to cultural norms like female genital mutilation - not trying to Godwin the thread, but merely pointing out that I feel they are both symptoms of the same type of thinking.

On the other hand, eating with one's mouth open and putting others off their food, or talking with one's mouth full and risking spraying others with food, these are a different category of rude behaviour - the practical reason why they are considered rude is clearly evident. I'm yet to be put off my dinner by the sight of someone holding their cutlery the wrong way round - I guess I just have a sterner stomach than the Leper...!
 
First you say:
To me, pointless etiquette like cutlery etiquette

But then:

I am not saying you are contradicting yourself, but it is subjective as to whether or not each of the above is acceptable or not - someone who eats with their mouth open may well find your remark above snobbish

Rightly or wrongly, etiquette (or lack of) influences a person's impression of someone else, along with things such as dress sense & presentation, accent, vocabulary, personal hygene and the rest...