Sibling unhappy with parent's will

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Red Head

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Hello all, this is my first post ever so please allow for mistakes! Hoping someone can advise as my solicitor is not the best and unfortunately is my sisters solicitor too so feel he is just trying to keep us both happy. My story goes, my father passed away a few months ago and I was made co-executor of his will. The problem boils down to my sister not being happy with the outcome of the will, I was left my dads house and my 3 sisters left the savings equally. Some months have passed and my sister and I are not speaking now as she constantly wanted to meet to discuss me giving half the house over as feels as the eldest child should have got the house. Anyway, has dragged her heals, I have done everything and and solicitor is ready to complete things but is missing my sisters(as beneficiary and co-executors CAT form). My sister has told OUR solicitor she will not hand it in until I meet with her to discuss the house. It is also expected she will not anyway co-sign off on the estate unless I submit to giving half the house.

My dads solicitor is also mine & my sisters solicitor and feel he is just trying to keep everyone happy and recommending I meet her etc, I said my wish was to sign on a different day and again my solicitor recommends not doing this probably as will rub my sister up the wrong way.

Can anyone advise on my options, I do not want to meet her to be bullied into giving up half my inheritance.

Meanwhile the house is locked up tight, winter is coming and there are a number of break ins and worried for it's security. I have no intension of selling as would like to move into it in the next few years and therefore let it short term. My understanding as there are two executors I can not make any decision on the house without my sisters agreement, i.e. getting someone in short term to stay there even for free, a friend or such or even engage a private security firm to keep an eye?

I am at the end of my rope with this, do I have to wait this Executors year to do anything legal about it? I am not in a hurry but her share is not big enough to be in a hurry either. I have no problem starting proceedings or even suing for costs associated in keeping the house safe, the grounds are extensive and will need to be maintained, more costs. Again, any advise welcome as feel I am not getting any real advice from my solicitor. Thanks
 
She can't change the terms of the will, nor refuse to sign documents as a means of blackmail. I'm reasonable sure it would be possible to get a court order to remove her as executor. However that will take some time, there's a lot of steps to be gone through first.

I'd suggest trying to meet up over a coffee and see if you can get this ironed out; basically she agrees to act properly as executor or stands aside. If she continues to refuse to do either she can be removed.

In the meantime as executor, you are responsible for protecting the assets, so that means insurance, maintenance etc., right now I personally wouldn't let it out, your costs and expenses can be claimed back from the estate.
 
Red Head said:
My dads solicitor is also mine & my sisters solicitor and feel he is just trying to keep everyone happy and recommending I meet her etc,
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Is there any valid reason your sister is aggrieved at her inheritence in comparision to yours?

Your solicitor sounds excellent, trying to prevent a full scale family breakdown.

What is wrong with you meeting your sister, perhaps in a neutral setting, and you and she sorting this out once and for all.
 
Thirsty said:
basically she agrees to act properly as executor or stands aside. If she continues to refuse to do either she can be removed.

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That kind of thinking will only add fuel to the fire. Removing an executor is bound to cost money, and cause more acrimony. Plus she might make a claim under S117 of the Succession act.
 
There is always the possibility that you could sell the house and share everything equally among the four of you - i.e. your father's savings and the sale price of house. Sometimes the simplest option is the fairest option. It seems that neither you nor your eldest sister are interested in sharing equally - regardless of your father's will.
 
It has always been my understanding that the duty of an executor is to carry out the wishes expressed in the will. Even if she wanted to, she cannot change the terms of the will. To do so, she would have to officially contest it and I'm not even sure how that works.

What does she expect? That after the estate is wound up you would simply gift her half the house? (And how does that happen, do you live there together, or each live there half the year, or, I assume, sell the house and split the money?). She might feel entitled to the house but if your dad had wanted her to have it, he would have expressed that wish in the will.

Meeting her might be the only way to move forward on this but, from what you have said, you are nervous that she might bully you into something you don't want to do. So I'd suggest having a good friend there, one that will support you and not allow you to be talked into something you don't want. And/or, you might consider engaging another solicitor, one who will be acting only in your intrests and who can perhaps act as something of a buffer or mediator.
 
suarez said:
There is always the possibility that you could sell the house and share everything equally among the four of you - i.e. your father's savings and the sale price of house. Sometimes the simplest option is the fairest option. It seems that neither you nor your eldest sister are interested in sharing equally - regardless of your father's will.
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Why is sharing everything equally the fairest option? The only option, and therfore also the fairest option, is to follow the wishes of the father and divide the assets up the way he wanted. Sharing equally has no role to play in this, as far as I can see.
 
Hi Thank's for your thoughts everyone. I've been told S117 is not a real option here as we're both in our 40's and some provision has been made equally for all other siblings. As Bronte asked, there is no valid reason, my wife as have I, had looked after my dad for the last 20 years up to his death and assume his wish to leave the house to me was for this reason. I did have a meting once with my sister and it was all about wanting half the house as eldest child and have no wish to put myself in that position again and again, I just want this to be over. Again, thanks for advice all.
 
Hoping someone can advise as my solicitor is not the best and unfortunately is my sisters solicitor too so feel he is just trying to keep us both happy.
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This is a complex problem and you should not be using a solicitor who is "not the best".

You need to take separate legal advice and you should say to your sister's solicitor that it is best that he represent the executors and that you take separate legal advice.
 
Janet said:
Why is sharing everything equally the fairest option? The only option, and therfore also the fairest option, is to follow the wishes of the father and divide the assets up the way he wanted. Sharing equally has no role to play in this, as far as I can see.
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Sharing everything is of course the fairest option - regardless of the father's intentions re. the distribution of his wealth to his adult children. The OP - in his original posting - mentioned that the savings spread between the daughters didn't amount to much, whereas the father's property had extensive grounds that required maintenance. There is nothing to stop the OP from redistributing the inheritance in a more equitable way.
 
suarez said:
Sharing everything is of course the fairest option - regardless of the father's intentions re. the distribution of his wealth to his adult children. The OP - in his original posting - mentioned that the savings spread between the daughters didn't amount to much, whereas the father's property had extensive grounds that required maintenance. There is nothing to stop the OP from redistributing the inheritance in a more equitable way.
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So - let me get this right. People should not really be allowed to do what they want with their own property? Their own opinion is to be discounted? Really, they should divide everything equally between their offspring? Even though there is no legal obligation/requirement to favour each family member equally?

Even with this;

"my wife as have I, had looked after my dad for the last 20 years up to his death and assume his wish to leave the house to me was for this reason."

Ah now, really.

mf
 
suarez said:
... There is nothing to stop the OP from redistributing the inheritance in a more equitable way.
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Why do wills have to be equitable from the beneficiaries perspective? The testator expressed his wishes and absent any legal obstacle, that's what must happen.

I suggest there are several things to prevent "OP from redistributing the inheritance in a more equitable way.". The obvious ones are:

  • their father's wishes expressed in the will
  • the OP's duty as executor to carry out those wishes.

If the OP wishes to gift a portion of the house to their siblings, there are significant costs associated with doing this, reducing the value of the overall estate, and the possibility of CAT on the redistribution.
 
Redhead - you hold your ground, your fathers wishes are very clear, disregard all noise and secure what is intended in the will, meet with your sibling and remind her that your job as co-executors is to complete the wishes of the deceased party and that will be done fairly or with a battle if necessary, ask them to think over what way they would like to go over a weekend then carry on yourself regardless.

Meanwhile secure the property, keep all receipts from personal costs incurred securing the property to go against the estate, until this is cleared up the house is not yours, it belongs to the estate and both executors have responsibilities.
 
mf1 said:
So - let me get this right. People should not really be allowed to do what they want with their own property? Their own opinion is to be discounted? Really, they should divide everything equally between their offspring? Even though there is no legal obligation/requirement to favour each family member equally?

Even with this;

"my wife as have I, had looked after my dad for the last 20 years up to his death and assume his wish to leave the house to me was for this reason."

Ah now, really.

mf
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People have very strong feelings on wills / inheritances. I find it interesting that the OP never mentioned that he and his wife looked after the father for 20 years in his original posting. All we've been presented with here is one party's point of view. People can be unreliable narrators and can selectively alter facts to suit the narrative that most stongly supports their desired outcome - which in this case amounts to being the sole inheritor of a large and most likely valuable property. Furthermore, what is legally correct may often times diverge from what is morally correct. It's too simplistic to portray the eldest sister as being some kind of avaricious entity (bad) and to set this construct against the caring son (good) - who merely wishes to carry out the wishes of a benevolent father.
 
suarez said:
People have very strong feelings on wills / inheritances. I find it interesting that the OP never mentioned that he and his wife looked after the father for 20 years in his original posting. All we've been presented with here is one party's point of view. People can be unreliable narrators and can selectively alter facts to suit the narrative that most stongly supports their desired outcome - which in this case amounts to being the sole inheritor of a large and most likely valuable property. Furthermore, what is legally correct may often times diverge from what is morally correct. It's too simplistic to portray the eldest sister as being some kind of avaricious entity (bad) and to set this construct against the caring son (good) - who merely wishes to carry out the wishes of a benevolent father.
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For the life of me, I cannot see where you are coming from. OP says sibling wants half the house.

This is what OP says:

"as she constantly wanted to meet to discuss me giving half the house over as feels as the eldest child should have got the house."

No duress, no undue influence. Plus there is no legal requirement (save in limited circumstances) for parents to benefit adult offspring (a) at all and (b) equally.

Can you explain on what basis there should be any divergence from the fathers wishes? Why should the will be re-written? Other than to stop the fighting ( never a good enough reason to give in to unreasonable people).

mf
 
Would there be tax implications if you deviate from the letter of the will? - if the OP accedes to his sister's request he would be gifting her half the house.
 
Can't you refuse the inheritance.

But only if the house AND savings is split equally. TBH I can't see any reason to do this, on the information given. Unless to avoid an row that could continue the rest of your lives. Depends on the family relationship.
 
Thank you again everyone. It truly is a difficult time and horrible situation to be in. I think what I have derived from the above advice is proceed as co-executor and do all I can, this way I can not be held accountable for continued costs.
 
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