separation and morgage advice

I've got a very complicated problem and any advice would be greatly appreciated!

Firstly, I separated from my boyfriend a year and a half ago. We own a house together which we purchased about 8 years ago. I moved out of the property and into rented accommodation leaving him in the house. He was out of work when I left him (of his own choice may I add) and remained out of work for a full year. We had a joint bank account which the mortgage repayments came out of monthly.

This is a long and complicated one so bear with me!

We re-mortgaged the house 2 yrs before we separated for 50K for him to invest into the shop he worked in at that time. He invested the money but nothing legally was signed which made me very uncomfortable with the whole situation. May I add I was quite naive and trusted him as he could "talk the talk"..

Luckily for us we did get that money back into our account which some of it went to clear some bills etc... My ex then decided he wanted a "career break"!

I always earned more money than him through out the entire relationship but there was never an issue on how much each of us spent. I know I should never have allowed him to quit his job and live off what was in our bank account but he had big ideas about his next career!

I however was doing very well for myself but working 12 hours a day 6 days a week so hence not much time to push him back out to work. But resentment was building!

I then was given an opportunity to buy out half the business I was working for. I jumped at the chance and went through the process of re mortgaging our house again -this time for 90K which I got approved for and bought into the business I'm in now... needless to say I doubled my workload and not long after left my ex. Im frustrated by him not working and contributing to household bills mortgage etc.

I have found it very difficult to get proper advice as to how to get out of this situation. Our mortgage repayments are just over €1800 per month and I have been contributing €1200 towards the mortgage per month on top of my rent of €650 ! As advised by a solicitor.

I've been more that fair as its been a year and a half now and I quite simply cant afford it any more and to add my business may not survive either!

I want him to take the house over and I was going to try to raise money to pay back some to him but I'm now thinking I do I really have to?

Also what would happen if I just stop making payments to the mortgage ... at this stage I really don't care if the bank takes the house back... he refuses to sell !

Any advice at all would be greatly appreciated!

Thanks

i think you need to take this one step at a time...

1) If you re-mortgaged to buy the business, does he also own a portion of your business?. if yes, can you get a separate loan and cut any ties he has to your business first?

2) What is mortgage split between amount remaining on house, his business and your business? Please clarify

If he is not working then he will not get a mortgage to buy you out. So he will happily live in the house for as long as possible. Does he still have access to joint account to live from or what is he using for food, bills etc..?

As well as the questions from chipps, you need to answer the following:

1) did you have a written agreement when buying the house?

2) If not what was agreed? Were you buying it equally?

3) How much did the house cost and how was it financed?

4) Who paid the deposit?

5) How much is the house worth now?

6) How much is left on the mortgage?

7) I understood that you got the money for his business back. Was this paid off the mortgage?

Also what would happen if I just stop making payments to the morgage ... at this stage I really don't care if the bank takes the house back...

Click to expand...

he will refuse to leave the house.
The bank will take about three years to get him out.
They will sell the house at a big loss.
You will have to make up the loss.

Your credit rating will be destroyed.

This is not a solution.

Thank U Chlipps,
1) No he does not own any of my business.
2) I remortgaged for 90k for my business.. we now owe back 291k on our mortgage... which is probably what the house is now valued at.

He is back working again... back in the job he originally left! we have since opened separate bank accounts and use the joint account for mortgage repayments which we both pay into... I pay €1200 and he pays €650... I think at this stage I should only be paying for my portion of what I took out for my businesss as I dont have the benifit of the house and he will eventually own the house?

Thank you Brendan,
will my credit rating follow me if I leave the country? I know it seems like a drastic solution but I really can't afford all this anymore!

I see you sought legal advise at some stage but I think you need to get further advise. I think this is what you need to do and to take action in some way. The sooner you can resolve all this the sooner you can move on with your life.

1) Good to hear that he does not have a share of your business.

2) Why did solicitor suggest you pay 1200? Is he going on basis that 90k of the 290k is by you plus 100k which is half the house mortgage? If yes, then this makes sense for now.

3) What is your solicitor suggesting as the next step to make? I'm not an expert here but I think you need to get either the ex to buy you out or agree to sale. Failing his agreement i think your solicitor needs to advise you as regards solicitors letter vs. court proceedings to force thru the sale,... ask the solicitor what the options are before you discuss them with ex. His buy out would obviously be the better solution all more peaceful solution

Chlipps,
Yes I'm covering my share of the remortgage and half the house mortgage... My main problem is if he buys me out or we sell the house I owe him half the 90k back.. I don't know how to raise that kind of money?

If house sells for 290k, then you will have approx 145k each (slightly less as fees, capital gains etc..). Of the 145k, 100k to your half of the house mortgage and 45k to pay off half your business or to pay out the ex which ever way you look at it...So you are approx 45k short. I'm not sure what kind of business you are in but would you get a business loan for 45k? Can you get a relative to go guarantor on your 45k loan?... Think of the positive side, if you get the ex to sell, then that would be great for you

Well Chlipps, to add, my business is struggling.. business account has an over draft of 50k and its always maxed by the end of the month.. my business is just providing me with an income.. a low one at that! It was a big mistake to get into.. but I've learned alot! a personal loan might be the best option but I'm committing myself to 5 years of large monthly repayments.. but I think its my only option to move on.

Ya i think you need to try get ex sell and move on.. What kind of business do you have?. Can you get someone to invest in it? Would enterprise irl give you backing? Maybe citizens advice group would have suggestions or maybe MABS? Best of luck

its a beauty clinic.. not making any profit and just about covering its monthly outgoings.. nobody would invest in it.. I bought 50% of it as an ongoing concern but it had alot of hidden problems... when we remortgage the house for the business i got approved by the bank for "home improvements" .. therefore maybe I don't really have to pay my ex anything? I want to be fair and have been paying my way but considering I supported him while he was out of work and I furnished the house myself when we first purchased it.. May I also add I took responsibility for the credit card (€7000) when i left which we both used during the relationship.. i think I really don't owe him anything.. He can have the house.. All I want is rid of the connection and the monthly repayments which I feel he should be covering by himself by now? He refuses to sell or rent the house out and wants to keep the house for himself. I have payed 22k towards the mortgage over the past 18 months, he has paid 12k and has the benefit of sole use of the house. I just want him to take over the property so I no longer have to make any repayments.. I only earn 30k and have rent to pay also!!

What is ex income now?... Would it be sufficient to get mortgage for the 200k

As regards your business.. can you sell your business share or rent it out .. and that would allow you maybe go work elsewhere?

thanks for ur help chlipps,
I applied to have the mortgage pushed out to 33 yrs last week.. which now reduces our repayments to about 1500 per month.. I'm sure if he rented a room out he could manage that but will the bank let me sigh over the house to him.. 291k is left on the mortgage..
regarding my business I'm going to approach my business partner to buy my share back.. for significantly less than I bought it for.. failing that I'm not sure how to find a buyer? I just need out of both situations really..