Relationship broke up: both want to buy each other out, she seeks a Barring Order.

[npgallag]

Can some one advise me on the rules of gettin a barring order?

My relationship broke up and we both want to buy each other out.

Because I wont leave she is claiming i was verbally abusive and has contacted the guards and they advised her to get a barring order.

Now honestly her verbal abuse was far worst than anything I said but regardless of that fact it was just said between us with no 3rd party witness.

Can she get a barring order on her claiming I am verbally abusive without any evidence.

Can I just go to Guards as well and claim I am concerned of physical harm as she did say " I wish you were dead".

I would be very grateful for any help as I am extremely stressed about the whole situation.

 

[Vanilla]

Re: Barring order

It is unlikely that she will get a barring order if you two have just had a few shouting matches. But if she says she is in fear of you ( for whatever reason) it will be your word against hers. Moral of the story- keep away from her as much as possible and try not to allow yourself to be drawn into fights. And sort out the house quickly.

 

[mf1]

Re: Barring order

Absolutely agree with Vanilla.

Barring Orders are necessary in extreme cases where there is a very real risk of harm. In my experience, only about 10% of domestic "violence" cases are extreme - mostly the rest is stress related and emotional fury with partners. The Court is not there to end that - that is something the parties must themselves deal with. However, I have acted for people where Barring applications have been made against them where, I am instructed, great exaggerated stories have been told under Oath to try and compel the Court to grant a Barring Order. In some circumstances, the best advice you can give a client is to leave a house if incidents are such that gardai are likely to be called - even if there is no fault on the person leaving. The difficulty with this course of action is that , whereas it greatly relieves the tension, it also removes the urgency to deal with the bigger issue of dealing with joint assets.

mf

 

[npgallag]

Re: Barring order

Thanks guys ..that help..I would leave the house to get away from it all but that will effect my legal position on the house we built. The wording in the letter was "our client was advised by Gardai that she should seek a court order to stop abuse". Now since this abuse never occured and she has no proof then I cant see her getting court order... also im wondering is there anything on my record now as she was just "advised" and she didnt make a official complaint against me..I dont think..Is there anyway I can check i wonder..?Can I just ring guards and ask..?

 

[Vanilla]

Re: Barring order

I think mf1 just means temporarily leave- ie for an hour or so while tempers subside.

Yes of course you can check with guards to see if they have received an official complaint- has she made a statement, have they recorded her complaint. And if she is doing this, then you can play the tit for tat game- everytime she shouts at you, you make a similar complaint etc.

But best of all, try not to engage, hard as it must be. And try to sort it out quickly. Have you tried the mediation service?

 

[npgallag]

Re: Barring order

Well thought about mediation but dont think will do any good because she wont accept offer from me to buy her out, as its family land etc, and I cant accept the small sum she is offering to buy me out. And when i turned down her last offer is when the verbal abuse got really bad...so we at a sort of stalemate at the mo. But dont think she made official complaint, as I would have been notified I think..?Maybe i should go to guards and make an official complaint..Will stay away for weekend and hopefully she will accept my new improved offer that went in yesterday..doubt it though.. thanks for your advise