Peter Kaye joke

Ricky Gervais: if a problem shared is a problem halved then how do you know that a particular problem is your own and not half of somebody else's?

David Brent: I always put half the CVs that I receive in the bin because I don't want to employ unlucky people.

What do you call a man with twenty rabbits up his bum?

Warren

Barrister to coroner; Is there any doubt that xxx was still alive when you performed the autopsy on him?
Coronor : 'No'
B: What basis have you for this thinking he was deceased?
C ''His brain was sitting on a jar on my desk''
B: ''Nevertheless I put it to you that there was a possability that he may have made a full recovery and returned to a normal life before you carried out the autopsy''
C: ''I suppose there is a possability that he could have recovered without his brain and returned as a barrister in the coronors court''

What do you call a Kerrywoman hanging on a wall?

Muriel.

When is a bus not a bus?

When it turns into a street