Middled Aged Internet Dating

Status
Not open for further replies.
Leo said:
But surely in a bar/ club you're just swapping the tech filters for biological ones?
Click to expand...
But technology is not real life, you don't date the image and profile on a dating site, you date the biological reality and that is much more real in a club or a bar. What is a "biological filter" anyway, biology is reality
 
joe sod said:
But technology is not real life, you don't date the image and profile on a dating site, you date the biological reality and that is much more real in a club or a bar. What is a "biological filter" anyway, biology is reality
Click to expand...

You didn't click the link....

But technology is real and very much a part of everyday life....unless you live in a cave.
 
Now I've never tried it and am not on the lookout but I have always though internet dating of some sort is a great idea for narrowing the field as such and cutting out time wasting especially as you get older. As I have never frequented pubs and clubs even in my youth (brought up in a pub so saw enough of that) there would be no chance of me finding someone that way if I was looking, equally if I did want someone I wouldn't particularly be looking for someone whose idea of entertainment was pubs and clubs as they are not where I would socialise.

Wouldn't it be better to narrow down the similarities etc that might make two people more compatible so a bit of a screening service could be good
 
An article in the independent today reinforces my point about dating sites not being reality and an easy way for fraudsters to create a false profile . A woman was duped out of a large sum of money by fraudsters who took advantage of her loneliness which was exaggerated by corona virus restrictions. Here is a quote

"The incidences of romance fraud scams are traditionally higher around times like Valentine's Day. But the coronavirus pandemic lockdown led to a spike in cases because the gangs were able to take advantage of some people who were stuck at home feeling alone and vulnerable."
 
A few things to clear up - if male life expectancy is c.82 then anyone older than 41 is old rather than middle-aged.

The attractiveness of a female is based upon fertility so their age is intrinsic and that doesn't change regardless of the man's age.

In my experience women are mainly interested in how much money the man has and his potential to enhance their social status; personality, knowledge, values, interests et al seem to be unimportant at best, irrelevant at worst
 
ATC110 said:
The attractiveness of a female is based upon fertility so their age is intrinsic and that doesn't change regardless of the man's age.
Click to expand...

What a reductive, utterly misogynistic, statement.

ATC110 said:
In my experience women are mainly interested in how much money the man has and his potential to enhance their social status; personality, knowledge, values, interests et al seem to be unimportant at best, irrelevant at worst
Click to expand...

Your experience is undoubtedly your experience but what a very sad and limiting belief to hold.
 
ATC110 said:
What, stating the obvious biology of humanity?
Click to expand...
Womens' attractiveness has nothing to do with their intellect, achievements, sense of humour, kindness or a million other things? Happy husbands and partners stop fancying their other halves as soon as they stop producing babies? Reducing women's 'attractiveness' to their bodies based on a window of fertility over the course of their lifetime is entirely reductive and misogynistic.

In my earlier post also I referenced fertility:

It's undoubtedly a huge consideration for those who wish to have children. In the range of 'middle aged dating' which this topic is about, it's potentially entirely less relevant.
 

Not sure where to start to address this.. of course those facets are attractive and much more important than looks, but in the context of this discussion about middle aged dating, the initial attraction is primal.

Having had a longterm relationship with someone whose looks have wained but still finding them attractive is incomparable to meeting that same person for the first time and it's puerile to suggest it is.

It's too bad I have to state the obvious - no amount of social constructs change the incontrovertible facts of life.



Futurelookin said:
It's undoubtedly a huge consideration for those who wish to have children. In the range of 'middle aged dating' which this topic is about, it's potentially entirely less relevant.
Click to expand...

That's an intellectual rather than a biological argument.

When a man is attracted to a woman he's not thinking "I want to have babies with her" but that's the visceral basis for it whether he has any intention of carrying it out or not
 
Internet dating, including apps like Tinder, Bumble, etc., and other social media, is pretty much main stream now for people in their twenties and thirties. Nobody would be ashamed of admitting that they'd met their partner online. We're not there yet, but the day will come pretty soon when the majority of newly married couples will have started their relationship on line. I'm 37 and I know loads of such couples.

In my opinion, and experience, chatting online before deciding to meet one to one, is far healthier, if perhaps a little more nerve wracking, than the traditional Irish approach, which let's face it was, and is, almost entirely alcohol fuelled.

It is not correct to say that "the attractiveness of a female is based upon fertility" and that "women are mainly interested in how much money the man has". I don't know what your personal circumstances and experiences are, but I hope you come to realise that some day.
 

Another denial of base-level human biology...of course it is

And it is correct - I know numerous examples. There might be some differential between urban/educational standard than rural Ireland but it is rife in the latter.
 
I've heard good report on "The Match maker" (Sharon Kenny?) seemingly you pay to get someone matched with your own likes/dislikes etc. I think she meets the individuals in person but I could be wrong?
 
ATC110 said:
Another denial of base-level human biology...of course it is

And it is correct - I know numerous examples. There might be some differential between urban/educational standard than rural Ireland but it is rife in the latter.
Click to expand...

No offence but since your advice on another thread was to basically only meet people with a higher net worth than you, I don't think many people will be listening to your advice much on this subject.....
 
ATC110 said:
Another denial of base-level human biology...of course it is

And it is correct - I know numerous examples. There might be some differential between urban/educational standard than rural Ireland but it is rife in the latter.
Click to expand...

Well if we were talking about physical attractiveness, I'd point out that many of the characteristics of modern ideals of female beauty are less conducive to successful reproduction than their absence. But we, or at least I, am not talking solely about physical attraction, because I don't hate women. Anyway, in either case you're objectively wrong.

And on your second point, you're extrapolating from anecdote to universal fact. Which again, is objectively wrong.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Menu
Log in
Register