First management job - initial feelings not good!

Hi,

I was recently promoted to a team leader position in a technology company. Now that i have started taking some of these responsibilities I feel way out of my depth...ending up with loss of appetite and not sleeping right.

I dont think there were too many well qualified applicants for the position and i was a bit weary when i accepted it - technically i feel i have so much to learn. Plus I don't really think it is really in line with my overall career plan - I never had any great ambition to be a 'manager' but the opportunity came up and i though i should give it a go. It just came up too soon.

So i have 2 trains of thought - give it a go for 6 months and see how it goes. try to get a hold of what needs to be done. And then reassess.

Or, tell my manager i think i made a mistake in accepting the position and try to go back to my old position. (has anyone done anything similar).

One other thing - i find myself always thinking about this problem - not able to focus on the little things that need to be done. It varies from day to day. Sometimes i think everything will be fine - the next i think i've fked up everything...future career etc.

any advice? (other than grow up!!)

Before you tell your manager that you want to go back to your old position, can you request a meeting with them - sort of a mini-review? Ask them to appraise how you're getting on at the moment and see if there's anything you can work on together to improve and get a clear list of responsibilities.

What are the specific problems you're having? Decision making, time management, prioritisation, people management?

Don't worry too much about this affecting your overall career path - unless you're planning on doing something completely different, I can't see how a spell with management/team lead responsibility is ever going to do too much damage.

If you were promoted internally, then presumably they know you well enough to have thought you capable of doing the job, so why move yourself backwards without giving it a fair chance?

well 2 things,
say to your manager you find the move challenging (not draining etc) and that you need support - a weeks management course offsite would really make your move clear to you, as in what is and is not part of the job so you can actually carry it out before your health deteriorates
and secondly have a chat with yourself - what is your driving force to do this job - €, challenge, interesting job description what? when you figure out that you can resugn yourself to either doing it and or not.
If you keep thinking about the problem then there is a huge one - concentrate on what you are doing at the time and when you go home you can think of your move and if it is right for you. and yes sometimes we have to grow up but one should do it on their terms and not because a "great" job landed in their lap.

try not to wind yourself up too much. Feeling out of depth is normal and eventually you wont feel the scope of the job coming within your grasp.

Try to switch off, not easy I know, but loss of appetite & lack of sleep are signs of stress and neither will make things any better. Eat because your body needs it even if you dont feel like it.

As for sleep take your pick of the following:
Strenuous exercise - something like squash or indoor soccer can take your mind off things, get the endorphins going and help you sleep better. Great for stress relief.
Long warm baths
Massage
Nookie
Breathing techniques/aromatherapy/incense sticks - the whole 9 yards!!

And dont be shy about talking to your GP, better to go early before you get rightly wound up - its not all about medication (or it shouldnt be) - he might refer you to a counsellor if needs be. At least it might put your mind at rest that nothing major up.

Now all the above might be more than what you need, if you can get around to thinking that you're not on trial, there will be life after this job and the next and the next ....... then that might be enough for you.

Assess the areas of your new job that you are weak at and ask your manager for help in those areas. This could take the form of training or a mentor (or both).

I think you need to ask yourself if you are doing this job for the sake of the company or for yourself. If its for the company then go back to your old job as you are not being fair on your career or someone else who maybe more comfortable in that role. If its for yourself and want to be good in this role then research it and ask your manager why they chose you for the job. But remember, if you are not cut out for it, it will dent your confidence and actually sidestep your career instead of what you may have thought (promote it).

Sorry to hear you're stressed out about your job. I would definitely have a chat with your manager about how you are doing and that you are feeling out of your depth. You may be pleasantly surprised by your manager's feedback. It's easy to focus on your mistakes and your insecurities when starting a job you're unfamiliar with, especially with no yardstick, but your manager may help you to see the big picture and to focus on your achievements too.

If I were in your shoes, I'd stick it for another six months at least and see how it goes. (and I have been in your shoes several times, believe me, and in my case it has always got easier) But if you still don't feel comfortable and challenged by the job after that I would ask about going back to your old position. I know of several managers who have returned to their previous jobs or tried something else after giving it a proper go. In all of these cases their decision was taken well and without any problems, as they did not want to lose them.

Best of luck.

Qingdao, I would have a think about what specific areas make you feel underqualified or out of your depth (as Purple suggested). Write these down. Then have a think about how you could go about addressing these, eg: is there a course I can do? is there someone in the organisation that can mentor me? could internal communications be improved so that my team see me as the leader?

Only when you've identified the problems and some possible solutions should you ask your manager to schedule a review meeting with you. Then, together, you can put a plan in place, so that you are equipped to grow into the role. Your manager has a responsibility to help your transition and to support you along the way, but it is important, in looking for help from him/her, that you have given some thought to solutions in advance.

Very best of luck to you.

sorry i dont have any advice but sympathise fully as I am in the same boat as you.I feel totally at sea certain days and fine other days so its like a roller coaster.problem for me is I am general manager so no one to talk to except myself !!

I will try to take out of all the advice given the best things that would be suitable.One word on outside courses, they are good only if they are tailored directly for you.I did one recently that contains one to one coaching and find that very good.

Moving from a technical role to a management or team leader role is difficult and takes a lot of getting used to . Your mindset has to change a lot.

One example of this, is that you no longer "do", you help and facilitate others who "do". This can be very frustrating, just watch Martin O'Neill on the sidelines in his boots, almost having to be physically held back from going out and kicking the ball himself.

If you like it and get used to it, it is rewarding. ( I have to say that, to justify my own existence !!!)

As has been said before, Give yourself some time and do some training / reading on the topic.

I would recommend Fergus O'Connells book on SW project Management.
His training consultancy company is called ETP and I cant put my hand on their web address at the moment.

If it doesn't work out, the experience should be good for you anyway.
Good luck

ETPs website is www.etpint.com and I see for the website that Fergus has moved to France, so I assume this means that the book is a roaring success.

I know it's a naff sounding title, but get a copy of Steven Covey's "7 habits of highly effective people". It sounds like a gimmicky airport read, but one you could find yourself reading over and over.

You will regret giving up without giving it a fight.

Hi Qingdao

Been there, done that. Nothing wrong with a step backwards as we can't all be CEO.

I think that your health is more important than your career and would urge you to read again Betty Og's reply above. If your sleep and concentration do not improve and you still cannot stop thinking about work - please - go and talk to your GP as these things have a habit of sneaking up on you and before you realise it - you're in a bad place mentally.

Best of luck with whatever you decide

cheers
Dicey