Financial Advice Needed - 7 years on from last post

Rockyroad18 said:
Electricity €350 per month (approx)
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Either usage is super high or you’re on a poor tariff. Shop around!
Rockyroad18 said:
House Alarm €30
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With wireless systems via app I don’t think anyone needs to pay for monitored alarms any more.
Rockyroad18 said:
Sports €300 avg (GAA, Soccer, Karate, Tennis - very active)
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€75 per month per child is a lot of money if you don’t own a horse or a boat! I know you don’t want to deny the kids this kind of thing but activities for their own sake are a bit pointless.
 
Those expenses for activities for 4 sound reasonable tbh...membership fees plus gear etc. And they are the cheaper ones! At your salary levels I would not be targeting reducing those. There is much more low hanging fruit.

Have you looked at installing solar especially if you have an ev and probably plenty of units used on electric showers? How well insulated is your home, could it be improved to reduce oil usage?

You mention moving closer to town...could this happen sooner ? Do you find you need less garden now kids are bigger and their interests mean you are constantly on the road? Would a newer more efficient build be an option for a move? Would it help with the college commute if you were closer to a public transport hub? Could the kids take on part time jobs if they could make their own way to and from work?
 
With these incomes nothing individually should really be an issue. My children cost me €500 each for activities, school, school trips, clothing... (Not counting food or anything we do together). However our monthly spending is about 4.5k a month for 4, excluding accommodation but including our travelling budget of about 8k to 10k a year. I would not say we are frugal, just have goals and priorities we focus on and try to save on basics like utilities. I found the budget given itself very confusing, with strange mixed and match of categories, sinking funds for current yearly expenses... I don't think you know clearly what and where you are spending and it makes it very difficult for you to make savings and cuts.
 
I can't really offer any advise on your finances except for what I've already posted elsewhere about early retirement and tracking expenditure
I find your husbands attitude a little strange when it comes to sharing finances but then again we all have our quirks, I know I certainly have some and like you Mrs C has made her peace with them all

But you mentioned in your OP that you would like to have "some nice family holidays" before they fly the coup, well I think you should both make that a priority over the next few years to have at least one "special" family holiday before full reality of life hits them
Myself and Mrs C are well travelled and though we enjoyed the hedonistic beach holidays, the ones we really remember and recall the most are the ones where we went on "tour" to places like Peru, Kenya, India and China to see Machu Picchu, Masai Mara, Taj Mahal etc etc
But one of the ones that surprised me the most and one that I had a very special moment in was a road trip down the east coast of America in 2011

We started in Washington and zig zagged our way down to Key West in Florida taking in as much as we could but it was Disney World that I remember the most out of all the places we visited on that trip and the highlight for me wasn't all the different parks and rides but the midday parade of all the different Disney characters, like everybody else I was standing there waving at Mickey and Mini, Snow white to name a few
But it was when "Goofy" came over to me and gave me a big hug that I had one of those emotional experiences that you can't fully explain but will remember for a very long time for all the right reasons
 
I think you are doing great OP given your circumstances. - Which are 4 dependant kids and a spouse who does not share the same financial goals or values as you.

The main thing I would worry about is your pension - your spouse has a much better pension than you, and you are putting a lot of your disposable income into your children’s activities and social life. As you say you have made your peace with your husband on your different views to savings and outgoings, so that won’t change. But I would recommend increasing your pension contributions and getting your husband to pay for more day to day costs.

Never take out a car loan again, instead save for a car. And your husbands costs (after car loan of €600 per month) seems very excessive unless he has massive fuel costs per week.

While I can see your husband retiring at 60 on a very solid pension I can’t see the same for you with your current expenses.
 
indeed, assume his view on finances will persist in retirement so he has a nice pension and you don’t because you prioritised your family while working . Above is good advice get him to start pulling his weight you should aim to get the pensions on a more equal footing .
 
Thank you for your thoughts Dr S. We just out of electricity contract so will shop around now for new one. Spouse just told me he has already cancelled Alarm so that’s gone.
The activities include me as well. I think the activities are very important for their health, social ability, team work, learning to loose, friendships and keeping them away from screens. They won’t last forever but I believe an important investment.
 
Thank you for your comment Misemoi. I agree re the activities.. it’s only for a few years.
We have discussed solar a few times. The return on investment seemed long but we may re look at it. We don’t have electric showers .. All runs of heating.
Half of house is fairly old but all new windows, doors, attic insulation and extra layers in the walls (can’t think what that’s called). It’s 5 bed bungalow but we very careful with the heating and it’s timed to come on for short time in morn and a few hours in eve.
Moving closer to a town would help a lot of things but unfortunately I’m the only one who is open to this. We all love our home and kids especially don’t want to move. Even when they know they would have more freedom in a town.
Spouse is not open to it in any way as loves country living and space we have. I’m ok with that. I wouldn’t be prepared to force a big upheaval on everyone when we don’t really need to do it. Especially in teenage years.
 
I would agree it’s very confusing and I struggle to categorise. The sinking funds are the best thing I’ve ever done to manage my money. I get no surprises and am usually ahead of myself with these expenses.
Have you any suggestions on how to categorise better?
 
Thanks Carvelo. A trip like yours with the quirky fella sounds amazing! Certainly something to dream about
 
What I see is your husband paying fixed costs like mortgage and you paying the bulk of variable costs so I am saying switch those around a little so say you pay the mortgage and he pays kids activities and kids social costs like parties, cinema, etc.

You said somewhere that you pay more % wise because you have a higher take home pay - but that is because you are not paying enough into your pension. Even if you equalled that up, so that you pay the difference between his take home pay into yours pension pot so that you both have the same take home pay it would make your joint decisions on where to spend your incomes a bit more equal.

The last thing I am suggesting is to create conflict as this almost split you up before, but to think of your ability to look at your income as not being more that your husbands but equal, as you should be investing in your pension. His take home pay is lower because his employer is paying on his behalf into a very good pension, so he is gaining a significant benefit, which you are not seeing.
 
Thank you Clamball … really appreciate you saying that. When I look at where I was 7 years ago I’m proud of what I’ve achieved pension wise and debt etc. I bought my last 2 cars with cash. I was worried about cash flow with 1st starting college so took the loan but I can get rid of it now.
What you say re pension makes total sense. I need to get him to take on a couple of the kids bills and use that and the saving from loan to up my pension contribution to 30%. I’m going to do the sums later and see where I can how I can get there. Thanks again!
 
Agree .. great advice. Thanks!
 
Oh wow! You are so right! A brilliant way of looking at it! Thanks so much. I will have a chat with him later. Have a day of activities ahead so will check in later.
Thanks again.
 
Doing the exact thing this summer…bringing the young one off for a 3 week hol after leaving cert..I know it’s very extravagant but what’s the point having money later on in life but your child is living their own lives (as you would want for them)…can never get the time back
 
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