V
Voodoobazza
Guest
Budget & CGT - Ive gottta pay CGT ...again
BUDGET
Unit 57
45-46 Upper O Connell St
Dublin 1
01 – 67678990 Ext 364
Oct 2004
Attention: All Male Tax Payers
A Chara,
The only thing the Minister for Finance has not taxed in recent years is your willy.
This is due to the fact that 40% of the time it is hanging around unemployed.
30% of the time it is pissed off. 20% of the time it is hard up. 10% of the time
it is employed but operating in total darkness. Furthermore it has two dependents and they are both nuts.
From the 1st of Jan., 2005 your Willy will be taxed on its size using the “Willy Checker Scale” as follows:
10/12”                Luxury Tax                €50 . 00
8/9”                Pole Tax                €35. 00
6/7”                Privilege Tax                €15. 00
4/5”                Disability Tax                5. 00
Note:
Anyone under 4” is eligible for a refund. Do not apply for an extention. Males with willies in excess of 12” should file under Capital Gains Tax or join a circus.
Could you please send us your correct measurements to ensure that you are placed in the correct tax bracket.
Mise le meas,
Ivor Dangler
Inspector of Taxes
BUDGET
Unit 57
45-46 Upper O Connell St
Dublin 1
01 – 67678990 Ext 364
Oct 2004
Attention: All Male Tax Payers
A Chara,
The only thing the Minister for Finance has not taxed in recent years is your willy.
This is due to the fact that 40% of the time it is hanging around unemployed.
30% of the time it is pissed off. 20% of the time it is hard up. 10% of the time
it is employed but operating in total darkness. Furthermore it has two dependents and they are both nuts.
From the 1st of Jan., 2005 your Willy will be taxed on its size using the “Willy Checker Scale” as follows:
10/12”                Luxury Tax                €50 . 00
8/9”                Pole Tax                €35. 00
6/7”                Privilege Tax                €15. 00
4/5”                Disability Tax                5. 00
Note:
Anyone under 4” is eligible for a refund. Do not apply for an extention. Males with willies in excess of 12” should file under Capital Gains Tax or join a circus.
Could you please send us your correct measurements to ensure that you are placed in the correct tax bracket.
Mise le meas,
Ivor Dangler
Inspector of Taxes
