Having worked in an environment where I was seriously bullied for 2 1/2 years, I'm going to address some of the comments below.
The first and most important thing to remember in all of this with regards to being a bully is that you cannot expect to continue your career in a company where you report someone for bullying.
You may come out on top, and "win", but you're never going to be a winner in that company after making the complaint.
The best you can hope for if you follow any course of action is to come out on top yourself personally. In my situation, this was being paid to resign (redundancy) and a committment to proper reference.
Some people may jump up and down at this given our labour laws and all the rest of it, but facts of life are that if you make a complaint about anyone in a company, you're a marked person after that.
Apologies for the long post by the way, but I've a lot to say
drop-d said:
IMO, every1 is guilty, the boss for instigating, the juniors for not standing up for the natural right and the onlookers (you and the 4 others) for not interveening.
I strongly isagree with your opinion. There is only one guilty person here. And that is the manager. You can't be guilty of bullying by accepting it and "not standing up for the natural right" - that's a ridiculous thing to say.
As for not intervening, it is my opinion that this is the last thing that anyone should do in such a situation (even if invited). The most likely situation for the person that intervenes is that one or both sides will turn on them for interfering, or getting in the way, or sticking their noses in.
drop-d said:
First you need to get your boss's thoughts, maybe he does not even realise it is happening, also explain how it makes YOU feel uncomfortable.
Feelings, I'm afraid, have absolutely nothing to do with anything here. For example, you go to your boss and say that his/her actions make you "feel" uncomfortable, he/she could very well respond with an equally useless comment like "well, I feel that you're overreacting". Hasn't gotten anyone anywhere, but now the boss is aware that you've an issue with them. And if they weren't aware of what they were doing, they now have a reason to make things worse - on purpose this time now.
drop-d said:
It would be, maybe, inappropiate to appraoch the young ones. (unless they approach you)
This is a very tricky thing, and as I said above, you should generally not get involved. As I said, you're likely to end up on the wrong side eventually. Picture a situation where someone goes into their boss, on your advice to speak with their bullying boss. He rejects their comments, and their only fall back is "but Joe outside said that you should listen to me and that you're wrong to be bullying me" - bingo, you're not on the sh1t list as well.
drop-d said:
The issue is not you are being bullied, but you think you boss is acting unethically, and therefore is a matter between you and your boss.
Direct and honest approach always IMO
Wrong. Wrong. Wrong. If a boss is bullying someone, "direct and honest" is the last thing that will work with them. In most cases where a boss is bullying you, it's most likely to make things worse.
If you are being bullied, what I would suggest are the following.
Firstly, read your companies policy regarding bullying in your staff handbook. Become intimitely aware of what it says, what it allows for, and how the process operates if you feel you are being bullied. This is key because this is what the company/manager will use as a means of defence as well. It's their game, and their rules, and you need to be aware of how this works and to understand how to use their rules in your own favour.
Secondly, and most importantly, before doing or saying anything to anyone, is keep a listing/diary of each and every event where you have been bullied.
Not where you "feel" you've been bullied, but where your manager has gone against the companies policies. Keep dates, times, witnesses, and the specifics of what was said and done, and specifics of how the bully contravened the companys policy. You should detail also how you addressed each situation - comments you made to try to make things better/easier etc. And then, if it occurs, most importantly, how the bully may have continued even though they were given a reasonable way of stopping it.
The next step is most probably the hardest. Who do you go to? If it's detailed in the company handbook, then follow those procedures. If it means going to the HR department, do that - find someone there you have most confidence in. If it means going to another senior manager, then again, find someone you have confidence in. Don't get into the politics of the company - it's not a good idea to go to someone just because you know they don't like the person who's bullying you. That just involves their issues in your own personal situation.
In my own situation, I found a senior manager in a different area of the company who I knew well, and knew would be able to listen, give guidance, and help me with next steps. This was done on the basis of committing to not getting them involved - no need for them to be.
I followed company procedures, made my complaint to HR and waited to see what happened. I held back on the minute specifics, but just reported incidents - dates/times/actions. This was on the advice of the senior manager. The thinking was that the automatic and most likely ill-prepared comeback of the bullying manager would be to ridicule it, say nothing happened, and try to belittle the situation.
With the comeback of specifics to all of the incidents reported, the bullying manager didn't have a leg to stand on. The inclusion of witnesses to the incidents was the clincher in my situation. They weren't involved at all - they would have known that nothing was happening - but the fact that management, HR, and the bullying manager knew that other people had witnessed the incidents gave significant weight to my complaint.
How companies react after that is down to them, and I can only speak from my own experience. To keep everyone happy, I was offered a generous redundancy package (which was exactly what suited me), and I walked. I would have walked anyway, so getting the money to go was a bonus.
As for my bullying boss, I know from ex-colleagues that she's now been sidelined from the managerial position she was in to being a manager with no team and no responsibilities - the companys way of easing her out as well to make sure she doesn't do it again.