Au Pairs

Looking to get an au pair in the coming months and wondering if anyone on AAM has been through this experience and has any advice to give re whether to use an agency or via a website such as http://www.aupair-world.net/

Any advice would be much appreciated.

I used to work for an agency a good few years ago, so I can give some advice.

With Agencies, you are paying for the security that the Au Pair placed with you has been screened, vetted, and all relevant checks have been undertaken. The agency will usually have the originals so you know they are legit. Sometimes on the websites this is not the case and some are counterfeit, so be careful from that point of view.

I've seen Au Pairs placed with families from both agencies and websites and in my experience the agencies have the better result in the long run as the running work has been done for you. They've openly asked the prospective Au Pair questions such as where they would like to be placed (city, country, etc.), how much they would like to be paid each week, how many hours they are happy to do, how long they really want to stay for, so many questions its unbelieveable. They do this before they match an Au Pair with any family so that they know exactly what the Au Pairs expectations are and that they meet the families needs and wants.

I've seen on some occasions Au Pairs through the websites are so desperate to get to Ireland they agree to anything and everything with loads of smiles and nods and nice phone calls, and then once here either do a runner once they have a bit of bob, or they then change their minds on things. It happens sometimes with the agencies too, dont get me wrong, but overall not as often as they dont want to match a girl to a family that does not suit and visa versa. An agent will not introduce a girl wanting 2 months in Ireland to a family looking for a years commitment, its impractical and the agency will not get paid!

The agency does the same for the familes - they make sure the proper expectations are set for families. An Au Pair is expected to complete max 25 hours each week with regard to childcare and light household duties, with payment of (when I was working in the sector) approx 100-120 euros per week, and bed and board. If you are looking for any more than these hours then an Au Pair is not really for you - they want time to travel and see the country and learn the language, make friends etc. thats their reason for coming.

Nothing wrong with the websites, and I do mean that. You just need to have your wits about you and be able to read through some of the waffle, and you won't have the support the agencies offer, such as support for when things aren't going so well, Au Pair is homesick, meet ups for your Au Pair with others in your area or city, things to do and see, etc.

I've had some families have great success with Au Pairs from websites but do be on your guard. Set the right expectation for what you expect and need, and remember the guidelines. If its more than 25 hours, you dont need an Au Pair - you need a nanny or childminder.

Au Pairs are not to be seen as cheap labour. To tell you a story, I once had an Au Pair ring me who was placed on a farm with a family that knew the expectations. The Au Pair was being made to work on the farm for 10 hours a day every day, all for 100 euros a week with no days off. She was not given the job of minding the children at all. It really was awful, and the family were unapologetic about it even when we arrived at their home to remove the Au Pair. I've also had a family literally drop an 18 year old Au Pair at our offices with her bags and a note for us to say they no longer wanted her as the language barrier was too much. They hadn't even told the girl what was happening, she was so upset and confused. Be aware, they come here to learn english and not all have good language skills at the beginning, but they are quicker to learn when in a family environment.

dmos87, thanks a million for taking the time out to write such a detailed account, it is very helpful and the agency route seems the best option for us as it will be our first au pair so we might be a bit 'green' for the web site approach at this point.

This was a very informative post by dmos87. I, however wanted to give you a point of view from the other side. I came here 10 years ago when I was 18 for a year as I wanted to work on my English before returning home. (Still here ten years later!!!) I am sure things are different now but I do hope this helps. I went through an agency at the time and it was a great decision. I was desperate to go at the time but it took around 5 months for me to be matched to what they thought was the most appropriate family for me and vice versa. I remember going through a lot of interviews, detailed questionnaires, getting garda clearance among other things. I was offered an au-pair position in Limerick, Cork and another one in Dublin but did not think that family suited me. Then came along family A: they had 4 kids already and another one on the way. The lady did not work and my presence was more to allow her to ....relax!

If you are matched to the right person, it can be an amazing experience. For me, it was life changing....after my year there, I had decided that I was not ready to leave and set out to look for a job, place to live. They had asked me to come back as Ia live-out nanny but I was ready to move on.

10 years ago, I was getting 60 euro a week...I know!!!! Even though you get your board and food, it was a ridiculously small amount of money for the long hours I was doing. They needed a nanny rather than an au-pair. I felt at times that I was taken advantage of with long days but it is one of those give and take situations... Although there were some times when I was frustated, we got on so well that it was ok.

It was a fantastic experience and have absolutely no regrets!!! Ten years later, we are still in touch!

Thanks Mongola for that, we hope that whomever we get as an au pair will be part of the family for the year that they are here & that everyone enjoys the experience. I work full time but a lot from home & my wife 3 days a week so the person will not be left alone all week to mind our kids but more to assist in minding them. Neither of us work long hours so the person will not be required to do that & to be honest I believe that you get what you put in so the better we treat the au pair, i.e. like part of the family then the more likely that the au pair will be a welcome addition to our family.

You are absolutely right. If someone is treated right, they will put in everything they've got. Look after them and they will look after you. Welcoming a stranger in your house is very daunting. That person will share your private space so make sure you give yourself the best possible start. For your own peace of mind, going through an agency would make a lot of sense. Of course, this does not guarantee success but you would be on the right track.
While I would not recommend going on those websites where people advertised themselves , have you asked around you? A friend of mine was looking for an au-pair recently as she will be returning to work at the end of her maternity leave in August and the cousin of a very good friend of hers wanted to come here for a year as an au-pair : this is how she got sorted out!