Acceptable food & free drink at party

Hi, I am having a marquee wedding, so I am having a wee party the day after seen as the marquee isn't going until Tuesday. We are broke from paying for this wedding as we didn't realise how much it would all cost to hire out everything, caterers and drink. So, for the day after, our local deli is doing sandwiches/tea & coffee, and mum is getting cakes in. Then a cheap DJ for that night. This party is really only for immediate family and friends and people who travelled a distance and also, so we can relax and enjoy a drink and have a good bit of fun.

Can I ask, the sandwiches etc are being served at 3pm, so people that travelled up can have a bite before they hit the road, do I need to serve more food that night as I am sure it will continue into the night.

Also, I was thinking of heading to Sainsbury's for bottles of beer, just so I can give something, say 160 bottles of Bud, 130 bottles of Coors, 80 Bulmers. Is this enough as there will be wine there also? How do I say to friends it's BYO politely. I have heard off someone that is coming, that a few of them are presumming it is a free bar...

I think that if you serve sandwiches etc at 3pm and you expect it to go late you have to provide some grub later - to put it another way, what would you think if you were going to a party from pre 3pm that had a DJ etc and you discovered when you got there that there was nothing to eat after the sandwiches at 3pm?

Drink for the party - just state its BYO. Its not impolite to let people know that in advance.

big thing in new zealand where my hubby is from is bring a plate. maybe people (local)can bring food too? Just one dish kinda thing? Would a bbq work for food?

do I need to serve more food that night as I am sure it will continue into the night.

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I would definitely say yes, you do as it will be a long day. I always find a curry a good option - get the biggest pot you can find and make a big pot of curry. For those not interested in curry etc, a few cooked chickens, bit of salad (such as potato salad, lettuce, tomato etc), sausage rolls and cocktail sausages - all fairly low effort, and will def fill the gap come 9 or 10 o'clock!

Or if you have a BBQ in my exp most people always bring a few burgers and sausages.

Thanks for the advice, I suppose you are right about the food. I would personally be starving around 9pm. I really like the idea of a big pot of curry with a cold meat selection and salads.

The BBQ idea, it is just messy, as you need someone to cook it, get all the food and salads, plus our friends would eat more like 3 burgers and 20 sausages and then wonder where the rest is!!! You couldn't fill them. Plus I wouldn't ask them to bring their own food as well. It is a great idea but I feel like there would be a few, "Can you believe she asked us to....." Whereas with the curry, get someone to deliver it hot, eh viola! Maybe get half the amount of beer and say BYO as paying for someone to deliver it now.

The idea of cooking the curry would save on costs but I couldn't / wouldn't cook it and I wouldn't ask anybody else to do it. By the time that day comes, I know I will be fit to collapse.

By the time that day comes, I know I will be fit to collapse

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fair point - given the day previous, you will as you say, be knackered!

maybe check with local pubs for the catering for the evening - my local pub do curry, sandwiches and salads for about €3 per head and they will deliver it and provide plastic plates and cutlery. Or maybe the deli you are getting to do the Sambos might be able to accommodate you - extra business for them afterall, and a curry is the simplist thing ever! few veg, mix a bit of mcDonnells curry sauce, slop it in, simmer for a while, voila! not going to win any awards in China, but definitely will satisfy the hungry mob, esp with a few beers in them!

I threw a party last year and got 10 pizzas from ALDI at 1.89 euro a pizza. Threw them in the oven 2 at a time, and they fed hordes. Literally hordes, I think there was 30 people and I only ended up cooking 8 pizzas. You could pay someone a few bob to come for 2 hours and lash pizzas into the oven and out and slice them.

i like the pizza idea, everyone loves pizza

thumbs up to the pizza idea - you can get various toppings and ensure everyone is happy, meat eaters and veggies alike. also minimal clearing up - no plates or cutlery needed really except a serviette and a free hand! (except for great aunt Mabel maybe, who will prob insist on a plate! lol) but......

everyone loves pizza

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I would still have a bit of salad and cold meat cos not everyone likes pizza - esp the old dears, some of them might turn their noses up, but would prob kill a cuppa and a sambo or bit of ham and salad!

Whatever you decide, enjoy your wedding day and the party afterwards. And however it turns out, don't stress it, its the day before that's the important one!
good luck!

If its any guage, I had an impromptu dinner party last night, 10 people, got a 1kg box of uncle bens basmati, did the whole box, everyone had seconds and there was still nearly half the rice left. Chop up some fresh coriander to make it taste nicer.

Few nan breads in the oven for 15 minutes as well. Tear up and leave on plates.

A mild chicken curry way is the nearly the only way to go for the cheapest, least amount of hassle way to feed the most amount of people.

Hi, thanks for all the advice, you're great. I have decided what to do at last. Absolutely hassle free, mess free. I am going to get the local pizza place to deliver maybe 10 Wagon wheel pizza's and just ask for €10 each towards it?? I don't think they might mind that?? Then in turn, I will spend more on the alcohol then. Get a few more bottles of vodka, beer etc. I think they would prefer that?

Hi Abbica, i definitely wouldnt think that asking people for money would be the way to go....sorry.
You are essentially asking them to pay for attending your party. I know where you are coming from however with regards keeping costs to a minimum, but the majority of all the other suggestions above all would have cost much less then ordering a take away in...not to mention, actually tasting much nicer!
Personally i would feel that it might leave a bad taste in some peoples mouth after they going to the trouble to dress up, travel, buy you a gift for your big day, only to ask them to help pay for pizza - and again, pizza may not be to everyones taste, so what about those people...and what about couples? do a couple give €20 for a slice or 2 of pizza?I know though, that it is impossible to keep everyone happy.
Im sure your loved ones and friends will all pitch in and help the morning of, throwing a few bits together - noone expects Michelin star food - just something to line the stomach after a few beers etc...cocktail sausages cooked that morning,cold..rolls, a meat or two and 2 cold pasta salads - all could be served cold and prepared hours in advance.
If all came to all - BYO bottle&plate to me would seem far less offensive and people would feel like they are still helping you out..without having to physically give you money...hope this helps.

I wouldnt ask for money from guests nor would i do the pizza option.
I would imagine someone from your family would help you do a big pot of mild chicken curry and rice, tea and some ham and cheese sambos.

Just get the rice, a large packet of curry and a few breasts of chicken you would make this in no time - 20 mins. Id say €25-30
Then pots of tea and sambos again 30 mins to make. - €20

Like others said no one will expect a fancy dinner just something decent to line the bellies, most people love a curry and the tea and sambos will do for the older people.

Id say you would get away with about €60 max for about 30 people.

I see, it's never easy is it? It is just that we are having people who travelled for the wedding over at 2pm for sandwiches, bitties, cakes, tea and coffee plus a good lot of our friends and family will be there also with free wine and punch (sangria) on offer. Party will obviously continue into the night, probably be around 70 of us in total, whilst the rest will continue on their travels home. This is my dilemma, I don't want to fork out again for that night on food as I am spending it on drink, and I really do not have anyone that could cook up curry or sandwiches that morning for me. I just wouldn't ask anyone to do that, it wouldn't be fair and I am not for sure. I know you are right about asking for money, cringe!! I suppose it would only cost €300 extra to get someone to bring sandwiches and sausages. Just bite the bullet and cough up I suppose. Stop penny pinching, stop worrying and enjoy the day! thanks for all the advice, much appreciated.

Ah its stressful for sure - you must have a hundred and one things to sort already!

Why don't you ask your sister / closest pal(s) for help on the day? Trust me, NO-ONE is going to begrudge helping out, especially on day2 when all the formalities are over. Check out Lidl and Aldi for pizza's, quiches, finger foods, desserts etc. (Or if you have Iceland you are onto a winner!). For the sake of an hr in the morning both you and a friend(s) can throw them in the oven, bring them over and just nook them in the microwave as required. Making sandwiches is NOT a hassle - granary or white loaf in Lidl (80c), nice quality ham and lovely coleslaw there too... Paper plates and napkins. Centra are doing 24box of Bud for 17.99 at moment too I think.

Don't be afraid to ask for help - you may be surprised! !

Abbica, its not easy, and the wedding itself must be an almighty drain on your finances!!!Especially in these times...but you want it all to go so well...i know.
I think you keep going back to the ordering in option - which, is the most expensive by far of all your options...so its one extreme to another. Forget the order in option...get friends to pitch in...again, i know im repeating myself, the BYO plate is a GREAT idea. People are not going to think u are being cheeky...u will have a great spread of drinkies during the day for them. GOOD LUCK with it - whatever you choose. Im sure it will turn out great.

I agree with the BYO dish at least for those who are close by and combining this with the curry,salads,bread option. Cheap and cheerful and not to formal after the previous day. I woul dprefer eto be asked to bring a dish than to pay 10 euro for a pizza as 10euro would go a long way in Aldi/Lidl for acceptable party fare!

If, as you say, you're broke after the wedding, forget about another party the following day. Many or most of your guests will be too tired to enjoy it anyhow. And so will you.

Have to have the party now as DJ booked and everyone asked and I think they are more excited about that than the wedding, plus marquee is there for a further 4 days after the wedding so shame not to use it! I am not so broke though that I can't afford it, it is just where do you draw the line on spending money out of a loan!! Non stop. But thanks for all your advice. I am going to stop and just get it delivered, don't go mad, I just couldn't wake up the day after the wedding and start making sandwiches, curries and stuff. I would rather just pay and be done with it. Easier for all concerned, stress free and we are conserving energy! As you say ubiquitous, we will all be too tired but alas not so tired we can't party though!!! Hope the rain picks up, might be back onto the forum soon discussing umbrellas!!!

You could probably get a better deal if you order in advance for a local deli, or some caterers. Try and knock out a deal, esp since you are ordering bulk, and get them to drop it around that day, or some one could even go to collect it.
We did similar for a party at home. They supplied the food in a few big pots, which we heated up and dished out, and returned the pots the next day.
Smaller caterer might not be too busy at the moment and it could be worth your while ringing around anyhow.
You will pay premium ordering Pizza that night. -that can always be your back up.