# A cushy number: easiest job you've ever had



## micmclo (8 May 2012)

Oh there is so much talk about unemployment and we're getting stressed 
We had a recent thread about the council out standing around leaning on their shovels so that has me thinking

So tell me, have you ever had a handy job?
A job where you shamelessly did pretty much nothing and still got paid

Oh I know you are a dedicated employee now but maybe in your youth?


I was once a hotel night porter and once I had my jobs done I'd lock up, put the doorbell buzzer and my mobile on vibrate and sleep for the night on the couch in the lobby.
Was a tiny hotel, some nights there would be less then ten residents so nobody to disturb my sleep. 

Breadman would wake me up in the morning 

Any stories?


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## june (9 May 2012)

babysitting for children who were always asleep when i got there


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## Deiseblue (9 May 2012)

When I was 17 I was sent to Ballywilliam Co Op in Co. Wexford by Waterford Flour Mills to test wheat harvested by local farmers for gluten content.

Due to bad weather earlier in the year the wheat crop was delayed but somebody had to be in attendance as some crops had been harvested - I probably averaged 1 test per day and spent the rest of the day sunning myself outside the office whilst impressing the girls working in the Co Op with my suave City ways !

I had one terrifying experience with a retired Wexford hurler - his crop had been harvested in error by a contractor who got the farm wrong - his crop failed the gluten test & when I told him he went berserk - he appeared to me at the time to be about 7 foot tall with hands like shovels - I thought he was going to kill  me !

I was dropped off every morning & collected every afternoon & dinner was thrown in .


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## vandriver (9 May 2012)

My first job was at a Co-op pickle factory in Manchester.On an 8 hour shift,we worked half hour on,half hour off with an hour for breakfast.We also changed/showered on company time.I reckon I did 3 hours a day.
And the best bit,£120 a week nearly 30 years ago (a pint in my local was 49p).
My mam,bless her said I'd have to contribute to the household now I was earning,and demanded a tenner a week.I never did tell her my wages!


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## Latrade (9 May 2012)

vandriver said:


> My first job was at a Co-op pickle factory in Manchester.On an 8 hour shift,we worked half hour on,half hour off with an hour for breakfast.We also changed/showered on company time.I reckon I did 3 hours a day.
> And the best bit,£120 a week nearly 30 years ago (a pint in my local was 49p).
> My mam,bless her said I'd have to contribute to the household now I was earning,and demanded a tenner a week.I never did tell her my wages!


 
Similar scenario to some extent. 

Left college and no jobs and no jobs in my area of study so I took the first job I could as a clerk in a warehouse on nightshift. This meant a group of about ten guys and one supervisor. We would use the first hour to try and get the nights loading done all apart from one truck.

We then had 6 hours at our leisure on double time. Poker, movies, Fork lift racing, and various other sackable offences. We would then start loading the last wagon just before the morning shift arrived and would proclaim how we hadn't stopped all night.

Great money and good times. Yup the private sector has plenty of cushy numbers and also when you leave college and there are no jobs in your area of study; it doesn't mean you don't take a job. Lesson was that after 6 months in the warehouse, I talked them into letting me help them on a project on the basis of my degree. I did the work unpaid (figured I owed them a few hours) and they eventually created a new position for me working on other projects. Alas I actually had to do work and didn't get 6 hours of racing forklifts. But I did get a career out of it.


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## Firefly (9 May 2012)

Latrade said:


> Lesson was that after 6 months in the warehouse, I talked them into letting me help them on a project on the basis of my degree. I did the work unpaid (figured I owed them a few hours) and they eventually created a new position for me working on other projects. Alas I actually had to do work and didn't get 6 hours of racing forklifts. But I did get a career out of it.


 
Fair play! Just goes to show what can be done.

I worked for a very short time as a chambermaid in the States on my J1. I say a very short time because I was sacked! After a particularly late one the night before I was making the bed and when done it was the most appealing thing I've ever seen. Put the "Do Not Disturb" sign on the door and in I climbed. Fierce excitement about an hour later!!


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## Ciaraella (9 May 2012)

june said:


> babysitting for children who were always asleep when i got there




+1, and the parents always left lots of goodies and had sky movies, i used to love babysitting! 

Also worked in a leisure centre/arcade/pool tables type place where you paid a euro admission, i sat at a desk at the front door taking the money and chatting to the doorman, a very handy number!


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## truthseeker (9 May 2012)

I used to work in the local supermarket, 2 evenings a week and all day saturday.

Somehow I became 'Head of Hygiene' - this meant that on a 9-6 saturday shift I would be sent upstairs to the ladies locker/changing rooms/loos at around 11.30 and expected back on the shop floor around 5pm- ish.

I had to change the floor mats, wash the floors in 2 rooms, clean the loos, sinks, mirrors, change the towels and do a general tidy up. There was about 2 hours work in it if you went flat out. Naturally I went on a full go slow, and the entire day was me sitting about smoking (you were allowed smoke in the buildings back in those days), chatting to whoever came in on a loo/smoke break or shift start/end, with the mop near to hand so I could jump to attention and be studiously washing the floor should a supervisor arrive. Its strange to remember pretty much a whole day spend in the loo as the best job but it really was!!

I also worked on the deli counter one summer and although there was less dossing, I was like a fat barrel of lard at the end of it, from spending weeks stuffing my face with ham, cheese, cooked chicken, quiche, and whatever else took my fancy.

I had a restaurant job in the states, that you had to be on the ball for when it was busy, but it meant you could eat a selection of stuff off the menu for free, and the stuff that was off limits, like steaks, we used to just add to orders then pretend that one person in the party had left because they were ill so we might as well eat the steak, no point in wasting it.......


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## Firefly (9 May 2012)

Worked as a Postie one Xmas for 2 weeks. I was paid from (I think) 9am - 3.30pm but could go home whenever the work was done. After figuring out the route the first day, I was usually back in college for before 12. Not dossing per se, but it felt like free money at the time.


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## Vanilla (9 May 2012)

I spent one summer working in a cafe/halting site for caravan & horses on the ring of kerry. It was in the middle of nowhere so if you were in the cafe for the day, customers were few and far between. We spent a lot of the day eating apple pie and drinking coffee. There was HUGE excitement one day when the Hot House Flowers came in. 

If you were working in the Caravan park all you had to do was wait for the caravans to come in, and then take the horse off to the field which was half way up a mountain. Naturally this could take up to two hours. I'm sure it must have rained, but all I can remember is the heat of the sun, the smell of coffee and mad laughter all summer as the all-girl staff lazed about.


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## micmclo (9 May 2012)

Ah, I'd forgotton about my creamery job

Was employed as a general operative for a summer job in Nenagh Co-op
What that realy meant was I swept the floors 
It's an impossible job, bust your ass to clean a floor in the morning and it's would be covered in power when you came back from lunch

Place is massive, seven stories high and hundreds of little storage areas
I'd do some work in the morning, go find somewhere quiet for a snooze in the afternoon and then walk around and chat for the last hour



Latrade said:


> Similar scenario to some extent.
> 
> Left college and no jobs and no jobs in my area of study so I took the first job I could as a clerk in a warehouse on nightshift. This meant a group of about ten guys and one supervisor. We would use the first hour to try and get the nights loading done all apart from one truck.
> 
> We then had 6 hours at our leisure on double time. Poker, movies, Fork lift racing, and various other sackable offences. We would then start loading the last wagon just before the morning shift arrived and would proclaim how we hadn't stopped all night.



Bulmers in Clonmel? 

I remember a few years back they put forklift racing up on youtube
They all got sacked


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## Latrade (9 May 2012)

micmclo said:


> Bulmers in Clonmel?
> 
> I remember a few years back they put forklift racing up on youtube
> They all got sacked


 
No, employer will remain undisclosed (sober) and it was a good few years before the Bulmers incident. Mind, when that did happen I do remember thinking their antics were a bit tame. Nanny state indeed.


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## truthseeker (9 May 2012)

Latrade said:


> We would use the first hour to try and get the nights loading done all apart from one truck.
> 
> We then had 6 hours at our leisure on double time.



Ah, you just reminded me of triple time on a Sunday. 4 hours of 3 of us mostly left to our own devices - we had it down to a tee, 1 hours work, 12 hours pay. Loved it.


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## Guest105 (10 May 2012)

My first job at 15 was selling ice cream cones from a hut on the beach front, ah those lovely lazy days spend eyeing up the talent as they went by, the lapping of the waves, the endless supply of free icecream and never having to worry of putting on an ounce, those were the days


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## Liamos (10 May 2012)

I know of a particular premises which was being converted from its original use (not a pub) into a huge bar / restaurant. This project was to take 1 - 2 years, but ended up taking at least 5 years. 

They employed a bar manager who got paid for the entire period without ever having to pull a pint!


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## gabsdot (10 May 2012)

About 10 years ago I was temping in England. I got this one job which lasted 2 weeks. It involved hanging around in this guys house while he was on holiday. He basically gave me the key and I turned up every day 9-5. I had to keep an eye on his email and post any emails from this particular news bureau to his website. I Basically spent the time watching TV and surfing the internet. 
Best job ever


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## Delboy (11 May 2012)

Firefly said:


> Worked as a Postie one Xmas for 2 weeks. I was paid from (I think) 9am - 3.30pm but could go home whenever the work was done. After figuring out the route the first day, I was usually back in college for before 12. Not dossing per se, but it felt like free money at the time.



oh, how times have'nt changed!


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## liaconn (11 May 2012)

Ciaraella said:


> +1, and the parents always left lots of goodies and had sky movies, i used to love babysitting!


 

Same here. I used to have a brilliant babysitting job where the little girl was really good and went to bed no problem before her parents headed out. There was always a gorgeous supper left in the kitchen for me and I had the telly to myself all night. Then I would be sent home in a taxi. What a job!


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## truthseeker (11 May 2012)

liaconn said:


> Same here. I used to have a brilliant babysitting job where the little girl was really good and went to bed no problem before her parents headed out. There was always a gorgeous supper left in the kitchen for me and I had the telly to myself all night. Then I would be sent home in a taxi. What a job!



I had a babysitting job like that, the little girl actually used to put her 2 brothers to bed for me, tidy up the house, then go herself. So sweet.

I also had a babysitting job, right round the corner, as a 14/15 year old it would have taken me 2 minutes to run home, but the man used to insist on walking me (obviously he was doing the right thing!) - so it was 10 minutes of awkwardness for me - you know, 14, what do you talk to a man in his 40s about, and you can smell he has been drinking and its 1 or 2 am - I squirm remembering. Bless, they were such nice people really, I was just awkward!

I always used to feel a bit awkward at the money changing hands, except one lady who used to leave it in an envelope on the mantlepiece for me so we didnt have the actual exchange of cash.


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## becky (12 May 2012)

Some great ones here.  Once had a babysitting job where kids were in bed and I had full control of the telly.  This house had a VCR which was rare in the early 80's.  Went great until she kept forgetting to pay me so my mom called a halt to it.

I did work in accounts checking batches of invoice.  I knew the job so well after 3 years that I could get though the work in 2 half hour stints, one in the morning and one in the afternoon.  The hardest part was trying to work up the flexi leave.  I wouldn't call it cushy as it was so boring but it was a grand job for someone in their 20's.


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## DrMoriarty (21 May 2012)




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## Complainer (10 Jun 2012)

Was 'post boy' in a large factory/office during school holidays - many afternoons spent snoozing in a comfy office chair in the stationery store room downstairs - had a supervisor who had mastered the art of sleeping while filling out forms.


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## bullbars (12 Jun 2012)

Attedant for the Leaving Cert Exam supervisors. Had to bring in Coffee or tea - sit outside the rooms in case they wanted anything. Rarely disturbed so caught up on my sleep, junk food and doodling.

Edit: Had to stand at a large coke bottle shaped ice bucket at the K-club during the Irish open ( I think?). Keep it stocked up with coke/fanta/water for the golfers when they arrived at the Tee. As soon as I ran out of "product" ( we weren't permitted to refer to it in the vernacular) I was free to wander off and watch the golf. One Morning I fell asleep behind an advertising board at a Tee off, was woken rudely by Seve Balesteros teeing off and very attractice entourage member laughing at my scruffy sleepy head popping up out from behind the board. The Marshals were not amused.


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