# should I pay his mortgage



## rion (19 Apr 2011)

Hi I would be grateful of your views on my situation.  My fiance bought an appartment in 2006 for 150000 he still owes 141000 on this an has become unemployed he worked in construction. 

My question is I have saving of 35000 should I pay this off his mortgage which I really dont want to do as It is an appartment with lots of stairs up to it an isn't suitable for when we start a family.  I would like to keep the money and use it for a house that is suitable for our needs which idealy would have a garden for children to play.  

There are 3 bed houses going on the market in my area for 80000 which have garden which is so down heartenin.  My fiance cant pay this mortgage now as is on unemployed he wants to go to uk and declare himself bankrump to get rid of the mortgage.  

Will you give me your views on this matter as our heads are all over the place we want to start a family soon but know his house is unsuitable for us to live with children.  thanks!!..


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## Sunny (19 Apr 2011)

You are almost getting into relationship advice here so AAM might not be the best forum. My own feeling is that you should leave the debt with him to manage and if you want to buy a house, buy a house. There is nothing stopping you from helping him as much as you can but you are in a good position financially. Don't let his problem drag you down and force you to live somewhere you don't want to. 

Going to UK and declaring yourself bankrupt is not a simple solution. There are consequences.


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## rion (19 Apr 2011)

Hi and thanks for quick response am new to this forum could you advise me on were best to post. tks


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## NHG (19 Apr 2011)

I think that you already know the answer, no, its not what *you* want to invest your hard earned savings into.


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## Guest105 (19 Apr 2011)

Your boyfriend owes 141,000 and more than likely his apartment is in negative equity so if you were to give him your 35,000 it wont make much of a dent in his debt.

My advice is to keep your hard earned cash.   Can your boyfriend rent out his apartment?


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## Sunny (19 Apr 2011)

rion said:


> Hi and thanks for quick response am new to this forum could you advise me on were best to post. tks


 
Where you posted is fine. I just meant that this it might be hard to seperate the pure financial issues at hand from the relationship aspect i.e. you are engaged to be married to this person.


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## rion (19 Apr 2011)

Thanks sunny, cashier we have been trying to get it rented but with no luck there are so many houses for rent in this area that I'd say his house would be the last house anyone would rent because of no garden.  If we did get it rented it still would only cover half the mortgage as rent has gone down a lot in the area.  

I would like to be saving money for a house that is suitable but at the min my spear money is going intop this house to keep it going alto my finance wouldn't let me pay this months rent so as of mond we are in arears.  All advise welcome as this is really affecting our relationship at the min as can mnot think of anything else. 

Should I let my fiance go in2 bky and be blacklisted for ever.  thanks!!


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## moneyhoney (19 Apr 2011)

Could you buy a house yourself - have the mortgage, house etc. in your name & let him move in? 

With his negative equity (and the fact that he's unemployed and has a mortgage to pay) it's unlikely you'll get joint mortgage approval.

However, if you take out your own mortgage, in your own name, using your savings as a very sizeable deposit, you can soprt out the issues around who owns what later on.

I am assuming you are working & could make the repayments on your own?

Just saw your latest post there - you said "we're in arrears" - techniclly, he is in arrears. Sorry if that sounds harsh but you need to separate the financial issues from your relationship. It's great that you want to help him out but you seem to be very involved in his financial problems.


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## rion (19 Apr 2011)

Thanks moneyhoney yea in an ideal world in my mind thats what I'd like to do buy a house on my deposit income but will feel so bad leaving this house for him do deal with he knows we couldn't move in there when we have children.  

Is it realistic of him to go bankrupt or is there a better way.

many thanks in advance..


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## niceoneted (19 Apr 2011)

SOunds like you are renting a place and also have his apt. Is it in the same town/area? If so stop renting and move into his apt. It makes no sense to be renting and also for him to be paying  a mortgage on an apt. 
Have you had the apt valued and have you tried to put it on the market?

My advice keep saving. He will have to look for alternative work or go to the UK or further a field for a while to get earning.


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## rion (19 Apr 2011)

I rent out my brothers house for 50e a wk which is so reasonable and I dont want to up and move in2 a house that I know will only be suitable for a short period as we are trying for a baby at the minute and his house is not suitable for children ie to high up etc


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## niceoneted (19 Apr 2011)

Perhaps you should wait until this stress is out of the way before bringing a baby and extra expense into the mix.


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## truthseeker (19 Apr 2011)

niceoneted said:


> Perhaps you should wait until this stress is out of the way before bringing a baby and extra expense into the mix.


 
+1. 
You dont even live together now, so trying for a baby and bringing the situation of who lives where to a head would be very stressful.

I dont think you should pay off his mortgage if you never plan to live there, how much NE is he facing, if he were to sell his place how much would it go for?


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## oldnick (19 Apr 2011)

Other posters will say I am wrong and that there is a legal and moral duty to pay one's debts  but your boryfriend should just return the keys and go away. Absolutely crazy to pay 141.000 for something worth probably 70.000. Anyway, even if he could pay it off, he's not able to.

Yes, I know this is "wrong" but if he were my son I wouldn't help him  except to say declare bankruptcy in UK (not quite as quick and easy in UK as some suggest - you should read the posts in this and other websites).
Going to UK may be a good break that he - and you - needs, and maybe he'll get a job there. Bankruptcy in ireland is a joke -dont attempt that.


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## rion (19 Apr 2011)

Thanks again for all your views as we are going round round in circles just cant decide what is the best thing to do.  The house is prob worth 70000 so he is 71000 in negative equity

I am coming 36 so really need to be starting my family sn


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## moneyhoney (19 Apr 2011)

rion said:


> I am coming 36 so really need to be starting my family sn



Lots of people can relate to that one!

Not to complicate things even more but if you're planning on having a baby, will you still be able to work/get good maternity leave so that you could pay a mortgage? With your fiance not working, things could get tough if you're not working & have a mortgage to pay.

Would renting a house (that's baby-friendly) work??? You have plenty of savings and can buy in the future when you see how things work out in terms of family.


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## Sunny (19 Apr 2011)

moneyhoney said:


> Would renting a house (that's baby-friendly) work??? You have plenty of savings and can buy in the future when you see how things work out in terms of family.


 
Good advice.


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## rion (19 Apr 2011)

Yea moneyhoney think I will leave of buying the house for a while till I c how things go as i am happy enough living in my brothers house for now.  I would love advice on what to do with my finance's house do I put all my wages into paying his monthly repayments?? and will they (ptsb) take away his tracker as he has missed a payment. tks


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## Guest105 (19 Apr 2011)

What has your fiance doing about trying to solve his problem or is he leaving it all to you??  Has he spoken to the bank, are they aware he is unemployed? Can he restructure his debt maybe go interest only for a while?   He can't just bury his head in the sand as the hole will only get deeper.


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## rion (19 Apr 2011)

Yea he is bury his head he has wrote a letter to bank asking for a 6 month holiday but has had no reply so he has now stopped paying his monthly repayments.  He says he isn't paying it now and wants to declare himself bankrump


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## Sunny (19 Apr 2011)

Does he think he can just declare himself bankrupt and his problems will vanish? He really needs to face up to the problem. Tell him to ring the lender and explain the situation. Just tell him to grow up basically!


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## niceoneted (19 Apr 2011)

Yea he is bury his head he has wrote a letter to bank asking for a 6 month holiday but has had no reply so he has now stopped paying his monthly repayments. He says he isn't paying it now and wants to declare himself bankrump.


I would worry about having a child with someone who dealt with problems in this way.


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## Sunny (19 Apr 2011)

niceoneted said:


> I would worry about having a child with someone who dealt with problems in this way.


 
This is a financial website not a relationship advice or counselling website. You can point out the guy is acting irresponsibly without questioning the OP's relationship.


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## truthseeker (19 Apr 2011)

niceoneted said:


> I would worry about having a child with someone who dealt with problems in this way.


 
Thats a bit harsh, perhaps the enormity of what he is facing is just very hard to accept and he mistakenly thinks that he can declare himself bankrupt to solve the problem. 

What he needs is some advice/education as to what his options are and how best to proceed.

OP - has he spoken to MABs and if so what did they say?

Its imperative that he engages with his lender, he cannot just decide not to pay his mortgage - he needs to engage with them (best by letter so there is a record), explaining his situation and detailing his current incoming/outgoings and how much he is able to pay back on his mortgage per month.


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## rion (19 Apr 2011)

I know he is acting irresponsibly I wish I could advise him better but when it involves mine and my children (hopefu) there is times I think he could be right in just letting the bank take back the house and try an pay back the difference in a wkly amount to the bank it has been on the market for over 2 years and he can not get it sold..


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## Guest105 (19 Apr 2011)

rion said:


> Yea he is bury his head he has wrote a letter to bank asking for a 6 month holiday but has had no reply so he has now stopped paying his monthly repayments. He says he isn't paying it now and wants to declare himself bankrump


 

Rion -Your fiance is being extremely nieve in fact I think he is behaving very childish. He wrote to the bank got no reply so now he is going to punish them by not making his repayments and declaring himself bankrupt.

You didnt say how much his repayments are but is he making any contribution at all out of his unemployment benefit and has he approached welfare about making an application to get some of his mortgage interest paid?


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## rion (19 Apr 2011)

He has been getting mortgage interest help his monthly repayments are 600 he get 30 wk mortgage interest relief.  No he hasn't been making any contribution from his unemployment payment since his work finished he has used up all his savings paying the repayment in the hope that he would get work but has had no luck and his savings have run out making the repayments.


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## netz (19 Apr 2011)

Rion, if your partners house is only in his name please do not put your savings into it. He should get in touch with MABS for advice. PTSB will argue a restructure on the loan loan for him, as it is a tracker mortgage. He should be entitled to Mortgage Interest Supplement from Community Welfare Officer, as his only means is Social Welfare but he must be currently living in the property, or has the property as his official address. If PTSB do reposess house and sell at a huge loss, your partner will still have the pay the negative part of the loan, which will leave him with a bad credit rating for many years. This is a horrible situation for him, but because its not in your name, you will not be affected legally by any result of any action taken. Keep your savings for the time being, especially with the expense a baby will bring. And when things improve in general, you will have a nice deposit for a house, (only in your name) and if your partner is still out of work you can return full time without child care costs. Best of luck to you both!


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## netz (19 Apr 2011)

netz said:


> He should be entitled to Mortgage Interest Supplement from Community Welfare Officer, as his only means is Social Welfare but he must be currently living in the property, or has the property as his official address. If PTSB do reposess house and sell at a huge loss, your partner will still have the pay the negative part of the loan, which will leave him with a bad credit rating for many years.



Just seen post about Mortgage Interest Supplement - ignore this bit!!


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## rion (19 Apr 2011)

Cheers netz I will advise him to go chat to mabs cheers..


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## Guest105 (19 Apr 2011)

rion said:


> He has been getting mortgage interest help his monthly repayments are 600 he get 30 wk mortgage interest relief. No he hasn't been making any contribution from his unemployment payment since his work finished he has used up all his savings paying the repayment in the hope that he would get work but has had no luck and his savings have run out making the repayments.


 

ok he should be getting about €198 euro a week from welfare in addition to the €30 mortgage interest relief, so what is he doing with this money?? That's near €900 euro a month he has coming in.

I don't mean to come across harsh but they are many other people out there in a far worse financial state than your fiance, his repayments are just €600 a month even if you have to help him out a tiny bit he should be able to manage with the €300 he has left over for food and household bills.


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## PaddyBloggit (19 Apr 2011)

Don't put any money into his debts.

With what he owes it will be swallowed up and your savings will be gone.

His mess needs to sorted while you're still unmarried. Marry and you'll have his debt as a halter around your neck too.

With what he owes I reckon he should head off to England and declare himself bankrupt.

When you marry you'll be debt free .... and you then should manage the accounts.

This thread is worth a read:

Will filing bankrupcy in UK clear my Irish debt?


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## Butter (19 Apr 2011)

I am going to come at this from a slightly different angle.  If you are serious about marrying this man and having children together then you also need to solve this problem together.
You are renting your brother's place at €50 a week or just over €200 a month.  Between your salary & your bf's unemployment benefit & mortgage interest supplement you could surely afford the repayments of €600 a month?  Move in together and start paying the mortgage.  In fact start overpaying it.  Keep your savings in the best deposit account you can find.
Who knows when you may get pregnant - it could be a while before that happens.  And there is nothing to stop you living in an apartment with stairs for a few years even if you have a small baby.  Gardens are not important to small children & stairs are manageable.  Pay down the mortgage over the next few years and then think about a house.  I think you are making things much more complicated than they could be.


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## nacho_libre (19 Apr 2011)

Good point Butter and well made!


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## csirl (19 Apr 2011)

To add a little extra to Butter's advice.

Do not under any circumstances waste your savings lump sum on this property. Taking the advice, you should be able to cover the repayments via current income, so it should not be necessary to dip into the lump sum. 

You will need this lump sum when you eventually buy a house - probably need it more than most as you may not be able to rely on your bf's credit rating to acquire a mortgage and may have to do so in your own name only. 

The bankruptcy talk is rubbish - it is not the solution as even if declared bankrupt, your bf will find it impossible to get credit, including a mortgage, anywhere. And do you really want to hide in the UK for a number of years, particularly when you'll need the support of friends and family if you have a new arrival?

Your bf should also be making an effort to find employment. If he cant get any in his field, he should retrain to enhance his prospects.


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## Jim2007 (19 Apr 2011)

rion said:


> Yea he is bury his head he has wrote a letter to bank asking for a 6 month holiday but has had no reply so he has now stopped paying his monthly repayments.  He says he isn't paying it now and wants to declare himself bankrump



Your partner needs to understand that he can't simply declare himself bankrupt in the UK, he must apply to be declared bankrupt.  And there in lies the difference, when he makes the application, there will be an examination of his situation to see if he should be declared bankrupt or not.  His creditors (the bank) will no doubt be able to argue that €140K is a very manageable sum for someone in their mid 30s, provided they get work.  So he may very well find that his application is rejected or that the debt is simply restructured. Either way I doubt that he will be simply able to just walk away from it.

Also NE will have nothing to do with it, they will simply conclude that if he sells the house for say €70K, then the debt becomes even more manageable!


Jim.


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## partnership (19 Apr 2011)

My advice is to sort yourself out while you can get mortgage on your own - once you are married his financial problems will stop you getting it.  Let him sort out his apartment by going selling it and trying to come to an agreement with the bank.  Do not take over paying the mortgage in the meantime.


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