# Who owns my deceased parents grave?



## Kimmagegirl (18 Jun 2014)

Both of my parents are dead. Do the beneficiaries of the last will now own the grave of my deceased parents? Can one beneficiary stop another beneficiary from using this grave in the future?


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## Padraigb (18 Jun 2014)

A grave forms part of the estate of a deceased person. Often (I suppose usually) the executor or administrator of the estate does not assign that property to any beneficiary.

While the executor or administrator is still living, he or she owns the grave in a trustee capacity. 

On the death of the executor or administrator, the situation becomes less clear. I imagine that it is jointly owned by the residuary beneficiaries. It's probably down to how the management of the cemetery operate.

I think that you should be asking a different question: can a beneficiary use the grave without the consent of the other beneficiaries?


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## DrMoriarty (18 Jun 2014)

I'm interested in the point about the executor/trustee. What happens if the executor is a bank? Once the estate is finalised and all fees paid, I presume their "trustee capacity" expires?


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## Padraigb (18 Jun 2014)

Bear in mind that I am not qualified in this area, but have some practical experience and have looked carefully at the Succession Act.

I do not see that there is any provision in law for an executorship to be deemed complete. I wrote elsewhere in this forum that I see it as "withering away". In a way it makes sense: suppose that after the executor has distributed all the assets of which he was aware, and then a forgotten Prize Bond wins €1m. How is that to be dealt with, other than the executor claiming the prize and distributing it in line with the terms of the will?


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## WizardDr (18 Jun 2014)

@kimmagirl I think Padraig has given a good summary.

Usually there is a document regarding the grave or else the  graveyard entity will be able to confirm whats required.

It would be a pity if there was a dispute amongst beneficiaries.


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## SlurrySlump (7 Jul 2014)

In my family there was a lot of "grabbing" of house contents after my parents died by one sibling. I now realise that this siblings husband was also the executor of my parent's estate and all the information about the grave has been quietly forgotten about. Knowing this sibling like I do I would say that she has not forgotten about it though!


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## Tintagel (16 Dec 2014)

WizardDr said:


> Usually there is a document regarding the grave or else the  graveyard entity will be able to confirm whats required.



What does this document actually look like? Is it like a mini set of title deeds?

Would the funeral undertakers who organised the purchase of the grave on behalf of the deceased's estate hold on to this document. Could it be something as simple as a receipt with the grave co-ordinates on it.  We can't find anything relating to our parent's grave other than a receipt for payment from the undertakers.
Is it possible to get a copy and if so from where?


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## WizardDr (20 Dec 2014)

Unfortunately what can trigger the issue is a bereavement - and all this can be quite stressful. Some grave yards are well organised eg St Finbarrs in Cork. My late father had in his possession what appeared to be a certificate. I cannot recall that when he passed away whether we had the piece of paper or not - but we knew the plot and the Register had been kept and the undertaker was able to get sort it out.


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## Thirsty (22 Dec 2014)

Tintagel re grave document, it was just a single a4 letter with all the relevant details. Without checking my memory says it was issued by the county council responsible  for the graveyard.

So if you want a copy, I'd suggest that'd be yr first port of call. With a name, date of death and date of burial they should be able to help. The undertakers might have records also.


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## Anniekate (20 Aug 2020)

A family grave was looked after by the eldest member of the family after his parents died.  This member would not let any member of the family have any work done to repair the grave.  Now he died and his urn is buried in this grave  and he has asked his daughter to take care of it with the exclusion of his surviving sibling, who wants to do repair and cover the cost.  Can she challenge her niece as I feel she should be more entitled to repair it if she wants to.  The grave is in Ireland and she lives in England.  There is no title deeds of ownership.   In other words this niece is doing what she was asked to do by her deceased father.  Has she this right over her aunt?  I think that this is unreasonable.  I tried to discuss this with daughter and she wasn't willing to let go of her role to another member of the family.


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## Thirsty (20 Aug 2020)

My advice would be to stay well out of it.


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## Anniekate (22 Aug 2020)

Thirsty said:


> My advice would be to stay well out of it.





Thirsty said:


> My advice would be to stay well out of it.


Let me put my question another way.   If other family members decide to carry out repair works like cleaning and making the lettering more clear since it is an old grave stone, could they be liable to be prosecuted if this daughter decided to challenge them? 
My husband is buried in this grave and I want to add his name on the front together with her father's name as well and in order to do this the whole face of the headstone will need to be reprinted making room for all the names.  What is wrong with that?


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## Thirsty (22 Aug 2020)

I'm sorry for your loss.

Your post did not indicate that you had an immediate interest in the grave site.

As to your question, my answer would be quite a lot if other family members don't agree with what you propose.

Without wishing to be morbid, or unduly inquisitive, do you wish to be buried in the same plot?

I'm pretty sure that an additional plaque can be added, if there is no room on the existing headstone.


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## Vanessa (22 Aug 2020)

When my sister in law died her ashes were to be buried in her parents grave. We made an appointment with the cemetrry manager (Deansgrange Dublin)
The manager said that we had to get signed permission from all the surviving siblings which was forthcoming. That would indicate to me that the grave is in joint ownership. This may or may not be the situation elsewhere. I recommend speaking with cemetery management to get the full legal position.


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