# Dating Websites - Do people really meet their match on them?



## ci1 (4 Feb 2008)

Just putting the question out to get opinions.

My friend who has just broken up after 13 years wants to join one and see how she gets on.
It brought back memories of myself and a work colleague joining one many years ago at the same time to see how we got on.

I had a very humiliating experience which I can laugh about now but at the time was not very funny.

Has anyone any success stories? Or even any horror stories?

There seems to be so many of them.


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## pc7 (4 Feb 2008)

Hi I think its really changed now, two of my friends recently bit the bullet to give it ago, they were both sick of the drunken nights out in town and meeting Mr Right wasn't working that way!
So they firstly signed up to do speed dating, 1 actually met someone on that site before the event and they've been on around 8 dates now its going really well.  Neither one enjoyed the speed dating felt it got boring after the first few guys but it was a good way to test the water. 
My other friend is on match.com ireland and had 3 dates, she really liked the first guy and is arranging a third date with him.  So it seems to have gone well so far for these two.  Hope that helps some,


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## ci1 (4 Feb 2008)

Thats great tho! 

Myself and 7 mates tried the speed dating last year in the Summer.  Our table was like the night of the living dead! One guy asked me why I had got so dressed up so that will tell you.
It was a disaster, we all left at the interval.

I have never heard of anyone trying it through the websites and it working out. 

and as per my OP I had such an embarassing experience on MaybeFriends.com years ago that I promised I'd never put myself through it again.

I suppose if you trawl them you're bound to meet some nice people.  Just not going to chance it tho


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## pc7 (4 Feb 2008)

it took me a year to talk my friend into giving it a go, she's now encouraging everyone to try it. I still think some people have a stigma attached but sure your friend has nothing to loose and it could be a good way of just going on dates. 
She's been really surprised by the amount of guys saying the same thing she is "she's sick of meeting drunk people in pubs".  All of the guys have been professionals and polite, now she has had a few old lads chancing their arm and sending her a wink or that but that happens on a night out.  This is the site she's using http://match.ie.msn.com/channel/index.aspx?cpe=1


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## Caveat (4 Feb 2008)

Fortunately, I'm happily married but should I ever be on the "dating scene" again I'd have no qualms about using these kinds of sites. 

There does seem to be a stigma - people seem to think that those who subscribe are either perverts or social 'weirdos', but for me these sites would provide a practical, timesaving and more hassle free alternative to otherwise finding a partner - e.g. fine going out to clubs/pubs etc and stumbling into a 'relationship' when you're in your early 20s, but for me in my late 30s, the thought fills me with dread. 

However, I've yet to hear many success stories associated with dating websites - but maybe that's because of the stigma.


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## ci1 (4 Feb 2008)

What my friend has said is that she thinks people will feel she's desperate which she's not but that said its not possible to meet people in bars/clubs, unless its the 3a.m.er's as we call them that decide to come over at 3am when its time to go home.

I would be just concerned about the safety of meeting strangers but I suppose common sense would prevail and you would let people know where you are going, and go somewhere busy with people etc etc

I've not heard of many success stories myself hence why I'm asking. I'm sure there are plenty, or even people who have gone on a few dates and enjoyed it while it lasted.

I'll encourage her to go for it and time will tell


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## truthseeker (5 Feb 2008)

Ive a success story! Well a partial success story. I met and successfully dated a guy I met on maybefriends. We didnt stay together but it was nothing to do with how we had met, we would have broken up for the same reasons had we met in a pub or through friends - just werent fully compatible.

I wasnt even aware there was a stigma attached!!! I dont think meeting someone online is any different to meeting them elsewhere. People say that meeting online leaves you open to all sorts of liars and charlatans, but the bottom line is that you dont know if anything the bloke you met at the bar on saturday night is telling you the truth!! Plus with the online dating you aproach the first date with caution and arrange to text a friend, let people know where you are etc...so it might even be safer than the first date with a guy who you only remember from a drunken connection in a pub.

I like that online dating lets you find out if you have enough in common to bother meeting up. At the same time it can be pretty ruthless, I have friends who were exchanging emails and getting along well then when it came to photo exchange they never heard from the guy again!! Some of them took it badly, personally I would shrug and say 'ah well, perhaps he prefers blondes' or something similiar.

If I were single Id definitely use a dating website again - its actually great fun and even if you only have a couple of casual dates its worth it for a laugh.


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## ci1 (5 Feb 2008)

Its great that you had a match out of it, even if it didn't work out its nice to just meet up with someone a few times and get a few dates.

I suppose the reason why I'm asking is that I too was on MaybeFriends years ago and got talking to a guy that I arranged to meet outside a pub on Baggot street.
He said he was over 6ft tall and had a London accent and he was living here.

I stood outside the bar for half an hour and no sign, called him and texted him and no reply.
then a guy walked out of the pub talking on a mobile phone and looking around and he had a London accent and I thought great, that must be him, I must have got the arrangments wrong and was supposed to meet him outside so I walked up to him and said Hi Jason, I'm (my name) and he said Hi, I'm Simon...are you on a blind date?

Talk about mortified, he went back into the pub and told all his mates and next thing I had 4 guys coming out of the pub to slag me all over Baggot St.  They were not being nasty or anything, they just thought it was so funny and wanted me to go for drinks with them.

Needless to say I just went home but I was sooo embarrassed and felt a little foolish if I'm honest.
the guy txted me later that night and apologised profusely and said he got cold feet and just couldn't get up the nerve to turn up...I had been mailing him back and forth for about 3 weeks, I just couldn't believe it.

So thats my story and why I have and probably won't try it again...its funny now and people laugh when I tell the story but at the time I was not amused


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## truthseeker (5 Feb 2008)

you poor thing!!!! I can imagine you were mortified alright!!

I wouldnt let one bad experience put me off, sure Ive had loads of non online dating bad experiences and I didnt let that put me off!!!

My online dater was actually very nice because I was acting as though he might be an axe murderer so when we arranged to meet I had a friend drop me to the venue (hotel bar), he was waiting in a pre-arranged conspicuous place, he didnt mind at all that I wanted to text my friend at arranged times (11pm etc..) nor did he mind after the date when he offered to drive me home that I texted his reg plate to my friend - well you cant be too careful can you 

I think the key to a successful first date with an online dater is to discuss expectations before you go on the date. My one was aware that I would go to a hotel bar, only a few drinks, and home by 1am. I was prepared to relax the 'rules' after a second date and not have a going home time arranged etc... but I felt it was 'safer' to have a finish time and also if it didnt go well it means you get to escape 

We also texted each other on the way to the date, so I knew he was leaving around the same time as me etc...

Ive some friends with good online dating experiences also. One long term relationship. I only had one friend with a bad experience, but even that bad experience was more due to the fact that the guy looked absolutely nothing like his pic and made no conversation so it was awkward. But that could have been the same if theyd met anywhere.


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## ci1 (5 Feb 2008)

I know it was pretty awful, what a wuss he was getting cold feet.

I know what you're saying about meeting people in pubs and its the same thing, I suppose it is when you look at it like that.

I did hear of a colleague of my sister who swapped photos with a guy on a website and when she turned up to meet him he was completely different and when he questioned him he admitted that he had got his hands on airbrushing software and airbrushed himself, shortened his nose and fixed his teeth kind of thing.  She basiclly told him that it was very dishonest and not a good start    I did laugh at that one.


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## truthseeker (5 Feb 2008)

There are pitfalls in any dating scenario. Online dating is just another way of meeting people but people are people no matter how you meet them. Im sure the same number of bad experiences exist through people meeting in pubs/clubs, through friends, at work, through a hobby/sport etc... 
If you ask around your married/long term relationship friends you'll probably find that a lot of people met through other friends or work. Im not sure how many people really hook up for the long term from a random meeting in a pub or nightclub - at least thats what I see among my own circle of friends - the initial contact is predominantly through mutual friends or work.


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## ci1 (5 Feb 2008)

I have heard that said over the years but its never happened for me. I have asked various friends to fix me up but a few have been quite blunt and said no, because if we do fix you up with a mutual friend and it doesn't work out then it can affect friendships, one friend has lots of mates that he goes out with but he said he wouldn't fix me up with them because they're all single for a reason.

- my sister is engaged to a guy that she met in copperface jacks 9 years ago. 
- I did bridesmaid for my best friend last year, the year of the foot and mouth when paddys day was cancelled we headed to kilkenny and she met her hubby in langtons.
- Another friend of mine got sick on her partner the first time she met him at a 50th party, he asked her out and they're still together 3 years on (won't be trying that)
- and recently my other mate met a guy in a pub the night before xmas eve while I was there and they're dating, getting on great.

Just depends, theres no hard and fast rules I suppose.

My younger sister did set me up with a guy she worked with which I went along with because I know she wouldn't set me up with someone dodgy. We got on fine but he wasn't my type, during the date whilst sitting in a hot pub watching a band play I went to plump up my flattening hair and a few of my extensions came out in my hand. He did see but was very polite and never said anything, I shoved them in my bag and never seen him again. Surprise surprise!

the search continues


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## truthseeker (5 Feb 2008)

you should write a book - youve great dating stories!!

you know youre dead right - I was thinking of my own friends again and some did meet in pubs. I met my match through work initially but re-met in a nightclub after not seeing each other for years.

I do have male friends who would love a girlfriend too - I dunno, it seems difficult to get the people who are looking all together in one place!!


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## MissRibena (5 Feb 2008)

ci1
I could get together to co-write the dodgy dates from hell book with you. I have heaps of horror stories of meeting the wrong guys and almost all of them through 'normal' means.

When I bought my house (ages ago), I didn't have a bean and stopped going out so much and ended up turning to the internet dating thing to meet guys. I met a good few; one or two I ended up going out with for a few months and had a great time. To be honest, I met far more interesting guys online than I did in my local small country town. I really found it great because sides of yours/their personality that usually stay undisclosed for a while are up for discussion from the off-set with internet dating, so for example I ended up getting in touch with guys with mutual taste in films/books etc that were a bit off-beat instead of the alternative of by pure fluke finding someone with similar taste in a bar.  It's obviously open to abuse by chancers and worse but they are in pubs too and you have to be sensible in taking precautions about where you meet etc but I really think it's at least as safe (if not safer) than picking up someone when you're not 100% sober.

I'm in a long-term relationship now and MrRibena was found on a high stool on a mad night out, so not from the internet but give me net-dating any day over the other mullarky.

Good luck with it


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## ci1 (5 Feb 2008)

truthseeker said:


> you should write a book - youve great dating stories!!
> 
> you know youre dead right - I was thinking of my own friends again and some did meet in pubs. I met my match through work initially but re-met in a nightclub after not seeing each other for years.
> 
> I do have male friends who would love a girlfriend too - I dunno, it seems difficult to get the people who are looking all together in one place!!


 
we should open a dating disaster thread  
ah they're have been a few good ones, the bad ones just seem to stick out in my memory, like the guy who sloshed half of his pint into my glass and went and got himself a fresh one so he didn't have to buy me another one   I kid you not!  A little later I got my jacket and bag and told him I was going to use the ladies and ran out the door.

I like MissRibena have just bought somewhere and not getting out as much as I'd like to and when I do its just to meet the girls for drinks and a catch up, not neccessarily to hunt guys because a lot of my friends are attached/married anyway.

I just might try the online dating thing again some day, when I pluck up the courage


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## truthseeker (5 Feb 2008)

If we open a dating disaster thread and I post my worst/funniest dating story my anonymity will be completely blown because anyone who knows me will recognise it


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## pc7 (5 Feb 2008)

ci1 go for it honestly what have you to lose, another one of my friends has signed up and has a date for friday and another guy has asked her for a date.  give it a whirl!


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## ci1 (5 Feb 2008)

My friend registered today so I'll see how she gets on and then I might give it a go!!

only thing that puts me off is putting a picture up!

but I had a look on the MSN that you sent pc7 and it seems quite good...

will keep you posted!


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## ninsaga (5 Feb 2008)

truthseeker said:


> If we open a dating disaster thread and I post my worst/funniest dating story my anonymity will be completely blown because anyone who knows me will recognise it



... truthseeker, you can't just leave that hanging there like that... go on share it .....


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## truthseeker (6 Feb 2008)

lets just say - to the guy whose handbrake I sat on and disengaged while smooching at the local lovers lane resulting in us starting to roll down a mountain, followed by me jumping off the handbrake and smacking my head off the rearview mirror which then fell off the windscreen and broke, and then while being driven home accidently dropped a lit cigarette into the side pocket of the drivers door causing a map and some work dockets to go on fire, causing an emergency stop on the M50 with a lot of flapping, and flames - im sorry, but why did you ask for a second date????????


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## tallpaul (6 Feb 2008)

truthseeker said:


> lets just say - to the guy whose handbrake I sat on and disengaged while smooching at the local lovers lane resulting in us starting to roll down a mountain, followed by me jumping off the handbrake and smacking my head off the rearview mirror which then fell off the windscreen and broke, and then while being driven home accidently dropped a lit cigarette into the side pocket of the drivers door causing a map and some work dockets to go on fire, causing an emergency stop on the M50 with a lot of flapping, and flames - im sorry, but why did you ask for a second date????????


 
!!! 

It sounds like something from Some Mothers Do 'Ave 'Em or the like...


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## Caveat (6 Feb 2008)

tallpaul said:


> !!!
> 
> It sounds like something from Some Mothers Do 'Ave 'Em or the like...


 
 exactly!


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## ci1 (6 Feb 2008)

Thanks for sharing Truthseeker.

you've made me feel a whole lot better


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## truthseeker (6 Feb 2008)

ci1 said:


> Thanks for sharing Truthseeker.
> 
> you've made me feel a whole lot better


 
Always pleased to help out


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## Mel (6 Feb 2008)

Off to the dublin mountains on a first date? You're very brave Truthseeker  

I've been dipping into these sites for a while now, but only going on a few dates with about 4 or 5 months. Have had some good and some not so, but no disasters at all, and am still in touch with a couple of guys even though there was no click, we compare/commiserate on progress!

The sites are getting very popular, and lots of really young people (early 20's) using them for the same reasons of pub/club not being a good way to meet people. 

It's not hard to meet people on them, it's a case of weeding out the chancers and making sure that both are looking for same thing, whatever that might be, so you don't waste each other's time. A big disadvantage is the amount of guys just looking to hook up, so best to be clear on that from outset if that's not what you are looking for. 
Edited to add: Another disadvantage is the amount of people on there who are not in any frame of mind to be dating - they might be jsut out of a breakup or whatever, and this is an outlet. 

The photo thing I'm between two minds on - you will get a lot more attention with photo up, but have found it's not always _better_ attention . Sometimes the more interesting and genuine people are the ones who look beyond the photo to your profile and then get in touch based on that. 

This might sound daft, but Facebook is turning out to be a great way to meet people - there are several applications on there for dating - Are You Interested is one, also Meet New People and Make New Friends - very simple and straighforward and without the cringe factor of writing a poxy description of yourself. I've had one date through that, and it went well, we are still in touch and will probably meet again.


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## ci1 (6 Feb 2008)

Whatever about joining one which I'm still in 2 minds about I really don't think I'd put my picture up.
If I got chatting to someone I would have no problem sending one if they asked but thats it.

Mel - do you mind disclosing which site you're on, you can pm with it if you want


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## truthseeker (6 Feb 2008)

ci1 - speaking from my own experience I didnt really bother with profiles with no piccies, just really cos it was easier - seemed like hassle having to arrange for someone to send it - also meant you had invested some time and then if you didnt like the pic how do you politely say 'not interested'? whereas if you could just see the pic up front you could just not contact the person if they werent your type physically anyway.


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## Mel (6 Feb 2008)

A lot of people are shy about photos though. 
I don't mind if someone contacts me without photo as they will usually send one on once chatting, although have to say I can't remember contacting anyone myself who didn't have photo up. Swap pics asap though I would say for same reason truthseeker says - it's less awkward to get out of it if not interested. 

I pm'd you the site ci1.


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## Remix (6 Feb 2008)

Thanks to the Robert De Niro approach - these little devices can save a lot of wasted time


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## WhoAmI (8 Feb 2008)

I can recommend MaybeFriends.com as it worked for me. Joined before Christmas 2001, met a 'lovely girl' in June '02, been together ever since, we're getting married next year. Also a friend of mine who joined after me met a 'lovely guy' after a couple of months, got married, had a child and are still together 3 years later.

The social nights were great craic, and I joined because I wasn't a great pubbing person, was EXTREMELY shy and I decided to use the technology at my disposal.

However, as they say in the States, 'Your Mileage May Vary'.


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## stir crazy (12 Feb 2008)

I noticed a dating service on the RTE teletext. Has anyone (with a story to tell of course ) ever tried that ?


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## Lauren (15 Feb 2008)

Lived in Australia for a few years and the majority of my over 30 friends had met via the internet (might be related to the fact that most of us worked in IT!).......Have done some internet dating here myself....Have met some lovely guys and one psycho so you have to be careful. 

Met my other half on www.plentyoffish.com. Early days but so far so good! His Valentines Day offerings yesterday were incredibly impressive!


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## MandaC (22 Feb 2008)

our office has 3 single women and we all went to a speed dating night paid for by the boss(said he wanted to get rid of one of us)

Out of 12 guys I would reckon 7-8 were oddballs and the rest were ok.  One guy looked about 60 and had a daughter the same age as me!  So was not interested in a date, sorry.

We had a great night, but did not take it seriously.  

Not sure I would go to one again


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## stir crazy (22 Feb 2008)

well I signed up to plentyoffish a few days ago, encouraged by this thread and with no previous experience of dating websites its actually looking really promising.... just hope to god shes not really a man with an identity disorder psychosis ....


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## shootingstar (22 Feb 2008)

truthseeker said:


> lets just say - to the guy whose handbrake I sat on and disengaged while smooching at the local lovers lane resulting in us starting to roll down a mountain, followed by me jumping off the handbrake and smacking my head off the rearview mirror which then fell off the windscreen and broke, and then while being driven home accidently dropped a lit cigarette into the side pocket of the drivers door causing a map and some work dockets to go on fire, causing an emergency stop on the M50 with a lot of flapping, and flames - im sorry, but why did you ask for a second date????????



that was the funniest thing i`ve EVER read on AAM... you`ve made my day.


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## truthseeker (22 Feb 2008)

shootingstar said:


> that was the funniest thing i`ve EVER read on AAM... you`ve made my day.


 
Pleased to give you a giggle


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## swordshead (22 Feb 2008)

truthseeker said:


> Pleased to give you a giggle


Me too..crackin up laughin here!
I once went out with a guy who had narcolepsy, i kid you not! Imagine how interesting i must have looked when people seen him unconcious asleep beside me when either out for lunch, driving and yes even the pub!! I actually really liked the guy, but after spending alot of dates talking to myself i called it quits...


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## truthseeker (22 Feb 2008)

swordshead said:


> Me too..crackin up laughin here!
> I once went out with a guy who had narcolepsy, i kid you not! Imagine how interesting i must have looked when people seen him unconcious asleep beside me when either out for lunch, driving and yes even the pub!! I actually really liked the guy, but after spending alot of dates talking to myself i called it quits...


 
I certainly hope he didnt fall asleep in the throes of passion!!!


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## swordshead (22 Feb 2008)

truthseeker said:


> I certainly hope he didnt fall asleep in the throes of passion!!!


mmmmmm.....well...thats another story...he also had cataplexy so sudden "energy bursts" shall we say triggered off a whole different scenario! Nice guy though seriously...


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## truthseeker (22 Feb 2008)

swordshead said:


> mmmmmm.....well...thats another story...he also had cataplexy so sudden "energy bursts" shall we say triggered off a whole different scenario! Nice guy though seriously...


 
Poor guy!!!!! thats so funny but the poor guy!!!


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## swordshead (22 Feb 2008)

Thats what most people say while fallin about the place laughin "not funny ahahah...poor guy...hahaa...shouldnt be laughin but..hehhe"!!!!


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## truthseeker (22 Feb 2008)

was there no medication or anything he could take for it?


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## swordshead (22 Feb 2008)

Yeh he was on a bucket load of stuff..didnt always work that well though!


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## truthseeker (22 Feb 2008)

Im back round to: The poor guy!!!!!!


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## swordshead (22 Feb 2008)

Aww i feel bad for tellin the story now...


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## truthseeker (22 Feb 2008)

swordshead said:


> Aww i feel bad for tellin the story now...


 
not at all - sure you said he was a really nice guy and you liked him but for the narcolepsy


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## shootingstar (22 Feb 2008)

swordshead said:


> Aww i feel bad for tellin the story now...



ah dont feel bad. tell us more..


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## truthseeker (25 Feb 2008)

shootingstar - you must have a funny one to share with us?


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## swordshead (25 Feb 2008)

There was another lad..an accountant and im sorry to say totally lived up to their reputation of being boring! In a conversation about the gym he went something like "well..i get there about 5pm and start at level 5 on the treadmill,for 10 mins, then i proceed to go to level 7 at an incline of 2. After that i approximately do 10 mins on the rowing machine...." ZZZZzzzzzz....needless to say there was a few swift vodkas downed to keep me awake! He got paraletic drunk and went from that to kissin the face off me non-stop with no conversation at all, to getting the bus home where he asked "can i come in for a coffee"! I go "i dont have coffee"...to which he replies "well tea then" haha...take the hint love!


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## truthseeker (25 Feb 2008)

swordshead - youre a hard hearted woman!!!!

my other funny one involves a guard who took me for a drive in his unmarked car and then told me that because the car was unmarked it couldnt be traced and with that took off up the dublin mountains!!!!


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## madisona (25 Feb 2008)

swordshead said:


> he asked "can i come in for a coffee"! I go "i dont have coffee"...


 
reminds me of a scene from Seinfeld

Donna: So, er, thanks for dinner. It was great.
George: Yeah. We should do this again.
Donna: Would you like to come upstairs for some coffee?
George: Oh, no, thanks. I can't drink coffee late at night, it keeps me up.
Donna: (Looks disappointed) So, um, OK.
George: OK.
Donna: Goodnight. 
George: Yeah, take it easy.

*The following day*

JERRY: You’re still thinking about this?

GEORGE: She invites me up at twelve o’clock at night, for coffee, and I don’t go up. “No thank you. I don’t want coffee. It keeps me up. Too late for me to drink coffee.” I said this to her. People this stupid shouldn’t be allowed to live. I can’t imagine what she must think of me.

JERRY: She thinks you’re a guy that doesn’t like coffee.

GEORGE: She invited me up. Coffee’s not coffee, coffee is sex.

ELAINE: Maybe coffee was coffee.

GEORGE: Coffee’s coffee in the morning. It’s not coffee at twelve o’clock at night.


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## swordshead (25 Feb 2008)

Ha ha brilliant... Sounds so similar...im glad i didnt have to go through an entire list of beverages with him..." er...no tea, or milk or water for that matter....jeeesus see ya later"!!!


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## madisona (25 Feb 2008)

if coffee is sex, then maybe tea means something less , which he was prepared to settle for. I've heard that many Irish catholic girls are only prepared to offer tea after a first date.


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## shootingstar (25 Feb 2008)

truthseeker said:


> shootingstar - you must have a funny one to share with us?



an embarrassing story in general ? im definitely not telling that, i`m scarlett thinking about it and it happened years ago...


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## truthseeker (25 Feb 2008)

shootingstar said:


> an embarrassing story in general ? im definitely not telling that, i`m scarlett thinking about it and it happened years ago...


 
cmon now - i told you my most embarrassing one!!!


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## shootingstar (25 Feb 2008)

iiii


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## shootingstar (25 Feb 2008)

I think I may have told this already on AAM (not sure tho...)

Christmas eve midnight mass many years ago. I decided I was gona wear my sisters new boots for going down to mass. I was georgous that night now i might add (bit of self bumping up there).. one of the church members asked me to help out with the collections so I mossied on up the front, my boots could be heard down the village all everyone could hear was the click click click everytime I walked and I instantly regretted wearing the boots. Sat in my seat, watching whats going on around me instead of praying. The usual, spotting talent and the collection time came around...

I got up, picked up my basket (pure holey jolie I am) and did the collected on tip toes. As I finished collected I walked back up the middle isle (still on tip toes) and i FELL... the money went everywhere. My fat This post will be deleted if not edited to remove bad language landed with a thump and I didnt know whether to laugh or cry. I swear to god my face went from a pink to a red to a deep deep purple in seconds. I calmly got up picked up every penny (NO ONE HELPED ME). I took the money and my sore This post will be deleted if not edited to remove bad language into the sarcastry and I opened the side door and let myself out.my face burned for days after that.


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## truthseeker (26 Feb 2008)

Brilliant!!!!!


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## Angrygirl (1 May 2008)

I've been waiting until i became a frequent poster so i could tell you my story....

Decided about a year after coming out of an 8 year relationship to try one of these sites, nothing to loose and you never know..!!!

Was on the site about 2 weeks, yea there are some strange people out there but I was lucky to be contacted by a great guy.
After talking through email and on the phone for a week we decided to meet...
That was april of last year, i moved in with him in feb this year and i've never been so happy in a relationship...we've had the marriage, kids and buying a house talk, this time its for keeps..... (she says with fingers crossed)


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## truthseeker (1 May 2008)

Thats a fantastic story Angrygirl -perhaps you should change your username to forkeepsgirl


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## Gordanus (7 May 2008)

A friend of mine went on a good few internet dates & some of them have been hilarious.   The guy who stepped smartly back when it was time to pay for the cofffees, saying "this place is expensive, it's 10c cheaper down the road" - on a FIRST date!!!!

The guy she thought was 50, turned out to be 70......

but most of them have been fun.  She's been doing it for about 2 years now, never got past 3 dates with anyone, but says she's met a hell of a lot of nice interesting men she wouldn't have met otherwise.  (She's 52)


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## DeeFox (8 May 2008)

An acquaintance of mine (girl) set up a date on the internet and they arranged to meet outside a well known landmark in Cork at a set time and then to walk to a particular pub for a drink.  She said she was standing there when someone she knew (and did not like) from work (a large company) came by - he stopped and started and stopped again - and she had a sinking realisation it was him.  They had an awful conversation where they were both red faced and saying 'lets not bother'.  And then walked away in opposite directions.  And they've never made eye contact in the work place since...


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## pc7 (8 May 2008)

Oh DeeFox that's awful! My friend who met someone on the speeddating site is still going strong, looks like a keeper. My other friend is currently dating two guys (very american!) she's going to decide this weekend which one to keep dating both met online so it seems the way to go


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## Pique318 (9 May 2008)

pc7 said:


> My other friend is currently dating two guys (very american!) she's going to decide this weekend which one to keep dating both met online so it seems the way to go




Ahem ! 'Scuse me for a second, but I do believe that if it were a guy doing this (dating 2 girls) and was found out by one of them, he would be called every name under the sun.

Why do you(and more to the point, your friend) find this so acceptable ?

What's good for the goose is good for the gander, after all..


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## pc7 (9 May 2008)

Hi Pique318 I don't see anything wrong with it she is dating two guys, in that she has gone to cinema, meals a few drinks etc. She's not dtd! if you get what I mean.  She has not had the "chat" with either on exclusivity and they could be doing the same. That's why this weekend she will stop dating one of them as time is moving on, why should she put her eggs in one basket? I think if you polled people on the online dating sites lots of them are dating multiple people to get a feel for who they feel they've most in common with or like, the are paying to be on the sites so why do one at a time!  Its how Americans date too, in that if you are dating you can date a few, but then you become bf/gf you stop dating others.


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## truthseeker (9 May 2008)

pc7 said:


> Hi Pique318 I don't see anything wrong with it she is dating two guys, in that she has gone to cinema, meals a few drinks etc. She's not dtd! if you get what I mean. She has not had the "chat" with either on exclusivity and they could be doing the same. That's why this weekend she will stop dating one of them as time is moving on, why should she put her eggs in one basket? I think if you polled people on the online dating sites lots of them are dating multiple people to get a feel for who they feel they've most in common with or like, the are paying to be on the sites so why do one at a time! Its how Americans date too, in that if you are dating you can date a few, but then you become bf/gf you stop dating others.


 
I agree - you can date as many as you like until you have 'The Conversation' with one of them.
Dating is only meeting up, going for a drink, cinema, meal etc.... getting to know the person before deciding to take things a bit further and perhaps meet friends/family, and do more ordinary things together. 
Pique138 - I would have thought men did this much more commonly than women (just judging by male friends and reports from female friends). I would think its perfectly acceptable.


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