# "Perfect Family On Board"



## wally (1 Feb 2009)

Okay.  Trying to stay calm on this....

Whatever about 'Baby on Board' Stickers in cars and 'Princess on Board' and the more ridiculous stickers which have evolved since this novelty began - one day last week, I literally had to squint to see if what I thought I saw was actually real - the car in front had a sticker which read 'Perfect Family On Board' and the picture was of an adult male, adult female and two children, which consisted of a boy and a girl.

I actually think this is bordering on offensive.  What kind of sado actually buys this sticker?  I take offence to it from the point of view as someone dealing with infertility and the ongoing truama of possibly never being able to have children as IVF is out of our price range and such a gamble, I do realise I may be over sensitive to this kind of sticker, but I just thought what about someone who has just had a baby which may be handicapped or that type of thing, or even someone having their second child who had been hoping to have a boy if they already had a girl or the other way around, and to land behind this absolute sap with their 'perfect family on board' sticker.

As someone dealing with infertility (and I know alot of people have a lot of much worse problems in life, I am not looking for sympathy), it is constant stuff to get through - most people don't have problems conceiving and are totally insenstivie and insulting without even realising it, but this to me is a whole new level.

No doubt some of you may respond to say I need to get over this type of thing, and stop expecting the world to sympathise with my infertility issues - but I just think this is totally unnecessary and absolutely insensitive to people who may have families or children who are not the 'perfect family'.

thanks..............


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## Vanilla (2 Feb 2009)

Somehow I think it was ironic. Did you happen to catch a glimpse of the occupants?


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## casiopea (2 Feb 2009)

wally said:


> Whatever about 'Baby on Board' Stickers in cars and 'Princess on Board' and the more ridiculous stickers which have evolved since this novelty began



Just a bit of an aside - on the "Baby on Board" stickers.  Im always surprised that they seem to generate such negative reactions.  They do, as far as I understand, serve a real purpose.  

I believe you are meant to have one if you have a baby in a car seat facing backwards (which is usually the case until the baby is 11kg).  If you hit the back of the car in front of you, you are thrown forward and could suffer whiplash where your neck is hurt by the force of the impact.  A baby sits in a carseat which is positioned backwards in the backseat so it is pushed into the seat in that case and its neck (which is very delicate) is protected.

However if a car goes into the back of you, you are pushed back into your seat but your baby lunges forward with impact as he/she is sitting backwards - it the reverse of the above scenario and the baby could suffer whiplash or worse.  The "baby on board" sticker notifies the driver behind you that there is a baby on board and to take extra care so as not to go into the back of the car in front of them and cause a "forward impact" effect on the baby in the car seat.  This is why the sticker should always be on the back window.  

I am open to correction but this is my understanding of the - baby on board - sticker.

As to your post - I agree the "perfect family on board" sticker is unthoughtful and insensitve.  Good luck with the fertility treatment I really hope there is a baby in your future.

cas.


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## Hoagy (2 Feb 2009)

casiopea said:


> Just a bit of an aside - on the "Baby on Board" stickers.  Im always surprised that they seem to generate such negative reactions.  They do, as far as I understand, serve a real purpose.
> 
> I believe you are meant to have one if you have a baby in a car seat facing backwards (which is usually the case until the baby is 11kg).




Well, if that's correct then the sticker should be taken down when the baby is not in the car.


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## casiopea (2 Feb 2009)

Hoagy said:


> Well, if that's correct then the sticker should be taken down when the baby is not in the car.



Yes true, if its possible to remove them, but:
1) depending on the car - a baby carseat (for example the maxicosi) is not always visible to another driver (especially the car behind).
2) a frazzled mammy has enough stress trying to strap in a crying baby into a car seat (my baby hates her car seat), strap the seat down in the car, get the buggy disassembled and all the components in the back, calm the baby down, without having to remember to put up and down car stickers everytime.
3) many cars display learner plates which are rarely removed when the learner themselves is not driving.


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## DavyJones (2 Feb 2009)

That doesn't sound right.

Most of us drive with caution all the time, a sticker won't make you drive more carefully,they are nonsense.


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## casiopea (2 Feb 2009)

DavyJones said:


> That doesn't sound right.



When I left hospital here in Switzerland with my newborn baby I was given a baby-bag which contained various bits and bobs (nappy rash creams, changing mat etc) including a "baby on board" sticker with that reason.  The sign is similiar to a "warning" sign as oppose to a cutie sign - iykwim? Its not a "princess on board" type sign its diamond shaped and is white with a red border - like a warning street sign.



DavyJones said:


> Most of us drive with caution all the time, a sticker won't make you drive more carefully,they are nonsense.



Most of us do  - but the very definition of "most" means not all of us do.  The (b-o-b) signs, I assume, are an extra warning.  Many signs and notifications could be dismissed as superfluous but are put up as a precautionary measure.


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## casiopea (2 Feb 2009)

By the way, Im not trying to advocate the use of them - I just dont understand why they generate such negative reactions when people rarely pass comment on the litany of other ridiculous signs displaying in peoples cars (which can be very distracting).


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## Ciaraella (2 Feb 2009)

casiopea said:


> The "baby on board" sticker notifies the driver behind you that there is a baby on board and to take extra care so as not to go into the back of the car in front of them


 
I think they are ridiculous, is the idea not to avoid hitting cars anyway?? 
Like I regularly drive into the back of other cars but because I see the sticker, gosh i better not. Load of rubbish in my opinion.


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## Graham_07 (2 Feb 2009)

Once a car is in motion on a public road it is fair to assume that there is at least one "person" on board and due care, as required by the rules of the road should be observed by all other drivers. That person is of equal value as a person whether aged 1 or 101 and a sign to indicate the status of that individual is, to me, irrelevant.


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## casiopea (2 Feb 2009)

Ciaraella said:


> I think they are ridiculous, is the idea not to avoid hitting cars anyway??



The idea is to take extra precaution Ciaraella.

I didnt mean to drag this thread off topic from Wallys initial complaint which is a valid one.  Sorry Wally.


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## Sherman (2 Feb 2009)

ciaraella said:


> i think they are ridiculous, is the idea not to avoid hitting cars anyway??
> Like i regularly drive into the back of other cars but because i see the sticker, gosh i better not. Load of rubbish in my opinion.


 
+1


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## Caveat (2 Feb 2009)

I think you're being over-sensitive Wally.

I loathe all car stickers but is there really any difference between your example and say, "World's best lover"  "Genius at the wheel" or something?


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## nesbitt (2 Feb 2009)

'Perfect family on Board', must be a bit of a joke really.  I suppose it would be like 'super model' or 'super stud' on board....  Jeez I'd feel like a right ejitt driving around with that on the back of my car.  It's bad enough when the kids are all talking at you at once and the traffic is murder....


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## Bubbly Scot (2 Feb 2009)

Graham_07 said:


> Once a car is in motion on a public road it is fair to assume that there is at least one "person" on board and due care, as required by the rules of the road should be observed by all other drivers. That person is of equal value as a person whether aged 1 or 101 and a sign to indicate the status of that individual is, to me, irrelevant.



I quite agree! It doesn't matter what age the occupants are, all life is precious. I always took the B-O-B stickers to be cutsie and a sort of "drive carefully 'cos my little darling is in the car" sort of thing. 

The perfect family one might have just caused me to smile wryly, surely it's got to be tongue in cheek. Yet it conjours up images of Homer Simpson's neighbours, all rosey cheeked youngsters and happy parents trucking along singing and playing "I spy".

Maybe a tad sensitive, OP but I can see where you're coming from having been in your situation. Good luck, and I wish you a happy outcome......and don't mind what we think when you put your own B-OB on the car.


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## Ciaraella (2 Feb 2009)

casiopea said:


> The idea is to take extra precaution Ciaraella.
> 
> I didnt mean to drag this thread off topic from Wallys initial complaint which is a valid one. Sorry Wally.


 

I suppose i'm biased in that i think car stickers, including the one the OP describes are a ridiculous distraction and I think very irritating but in terms of the 'Baby on Board' stickers by the same logic should we not have 'Elder on Board', 'Toddler on Board' etc. As in for toddler on board we should be more careful then if there was no child but less careful as we would if there's a baby on board?? Bottom line is people should drive carefully all the time and the age, number of people etc in other cars should have nothing to do with it.


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## BoscoTalking (2 Feb 2009)

Graham_07 said:


> That person is of equal value as a person whether aged 1 or 101 and a sign to indicate the status of that individual is, to me, irrelevant.


agree with this statement


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## casiopea (2 Feb 2009)

Ciaraella said:


> I suppose i'm biased in that i think car stickers, including the one the OP describes are a ridiculous distraction and I think very irritating but in terms of the 'Baby on Board' stickers by the same logic should we not have 'Elder on Board', 'Toddler on Board' etc. As in for toddler on board we should be more careful then if there was no child but less careful as we would if there's a baby on board??



The reason though why its "baby on board" and not "toddler on board" (for example) is that a toddler sits forward in their baby/toddler car seat - its only up to 11kg that a person sits facing backwards.  Hence only a baby.  The sign (according to the package we were given) informs the driver behind that an impact to the back bumper has the effect of a forward impact crash to that baby in the car seat facing backwards.  If you have a baby in a forward facing car seat (some parents move their babies to a forward facing carseat from about 7kg though are recommended to wait till 9 - 11kg) you should not display the sticker.



Graham_07 said:


> Once a car is in motion on a public road it is fair to assume that there is at least one "person" on board and due care, as required by the rules of the road should be observed by all other drivers. That person is of equal value as a person whether aged 1 or 101 and a sign to indicate the status of that individual is, to me, irrelevant.





Ciaraella said:


> Bottom line is people should drive carefully all the time and the age, number of people etc in other cars should have nothing to do with it.



Agreed.


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## gianni (2 Feb 2009)

casiopea said:


> I am open to correction but this is my understanding of the - baby on board - sticker.




I thought it was for a completely different reason... 

If your car is involved in a bad accident it notifys the emergency services that you were carrying a baby. It was a response to a few instances where the fact that a baby/child was in the backseat was overlooked due to state of the car wreck.

I don't buy into the notion that I should drive more carefully behind a car with one of those stickers. I drive with due care at all times!


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## michaelm (2 Feb 2009)

wally said:


> No doubt some of you may respond to say I need to get over this type of thing, and stop expecting the world to sympathise with my infertility issues.


You need to get over this type of thing.





casiopea said:


> Just a bit of an aside - on the "Baby on Board" stickers.  Im always surprised that they seem to generate such negative reactions.  They do, as far as I understand, serve a real purpose.


Indeed. They, along with Man Utd and 98 stickers amongst others, serve the purpose of restricting the view through the rear window.





casiopea said:


> I believe you are meant to have one if you have a baby in a car seat facing backwards. .


That's crazy talk.


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## casiopea (2 Feb 2009)

gianni said:


> I thought it was for a completely different reason...
> 
> If your car is involved in a bad accident it notifys the emergency services that you were carrying a baby. It was a response to a few instances where the fact that a baby/child was in the backseat was overlooked due to state of the car wreck.



If your car is in a bad accident and wrecked to the extent that the baby could be overlooked, surely the baby on board sign wouldnt have survived?


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## S.L.F (2 Feb 2009)

casiopea said:


> 2) a frazzled mammy has enough stress trying to strap in a crying baby into a car seat (my baby hates her car seat), strap the seat down in the car, get the buggy disassembled and all the components in the back, calm the baby down, without having to remember to put up and down car stickers everytime.


 
Sounds to me like the mammy in this case needs an L-sign



Caveat said:


> I think you're being over-sensitive Wally.
> 
> I loathe all car stickers but is there really any difference between your example and say, "World's best lover" "Genius at the wheel" or something?


 
I have both of these things tattooed to my arms.

What's wrong with them?


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## sandrat (2 Feb 2009)

well i guess if you are the worlds best lover they are wasting money on falsely claiming your title


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## gillarosa (2 Feb 2009)

My opinion of the 'Baby on Board' stickers is that regardless of their original intent it is actually a warning to other drivers that the driver of the BonB car has a greater potential than other road users to be distracted by what is going on in the car and therefore they should treat them with greater caution than usual. I put them up there with Taxi Drivers, liable for almost anything.

Now, a perfect family on board, I've never met one so wouldn't pay too much attention to that!!


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## liaconn (2 Feb 2009)

gianni said:


> I thought it was for a completely different reason...
> 
> If your car is involved in a bad accident it notifys the emergency services that you were carrying a baby. It was a response to a few instances where the fact that a baby/child was in the backseat was overlooked due to state of the car wreck.




If that is the case then they should definitely be removed anytime the baby is not travelling in the car with you. Otherwise the emergency services could waste valuable time looking for this nonexistent baby.

To the original OP, I think the joke behind the sticker is that the 'perfect family' doesn't exist. I do take your point about insensitivity though. I hate reading articles in magazines where celebrities who have just had a baby talk about how their life was meaningless before this, how they have now finally become an adult, how they didn't realise how pointless their existence was without children. They obviously never stop for a second to think of the pain they could be causing infertile people, people who have lost a child or anyone who, for some reason, cannot but would like to have children.


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## Purple (2 Feb 2009)

OP, As someone who has firsthand experience of IVF etc and had a sister who was severely physically and mentally handicapped I still think you are being way over sensitive.


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## huskerdu (2 Feb 2009)

All stickers on the back of car windows come across to me as silly, and mildly annoying.
The reason that BoB stickers get more negative reaction is that they come across as 
silly, mildly annoying and very, very smug. 

I have heard that the original idea was to alert the amergency services to the presence of a baby in the car, but this is a very weak reason.

1) As has already been pointed out, if a crashed car is crushed enough for it not be possible to see a baby seat, it is hardly likely that the back windscreen is intact enough for the small triangle is visible

2) I have enough faith in the emergency services to believe that they are not going to give up looking for occupants in the car, because there is no B0B sticker. 
( "Will we look on the back seat ?" -  "No, lets go home early, there no sticker telling us to")


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## Blinder (2 Feb 2009)

huskerdu said:


> I have heard that the original idea was to alert the amergency services to the presence of a baby in the car, but this is a very weak reason.



That is a myth. More info here. 



wally said:


> I actually think this is bordering on offensive.  What kind of sado actually buys this sticker?  I take offence to it



Really OP, I am sorry for the difficulty that you are going though at the moment, but you are being way to sensitive here. You need to know that the world is going to continue spinning even when it seems that your world has stopped. There is always going to to be something that reminds people of the difficulty that they are going through.

The sign sounds like it was a joke and not something that was meant to offend. Would you have had the same problem if you had seem the car after it had dropped one or both of the children to school?


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## wally (2 Feb 2009)

Wow, alot of replies!

Yes I did say people would say I was over sensitive.  I possibly am.  However one has to be in this situation to have a remote idea of what it's like, and I guess in life in general I just try to be senstive to people and their problems.  Yes it is very insensitive reading as someone said people going on about life being meaningless without kids blah blah Jolie going on about planning her next one, but I can't get into how annoying all of that is on this thread as it's too far off on a tangent.

I never said I wanted the world to stop spinning thank you very much - merely for people to try and be a bit more considerate to others, as I do in my life.

Purple, with all due respect you don't know my situation, whether there already handicapped people in my family, what IVF has been done in my family etc. and I won't elaborate on it, your situation won't be the same as mine.

I think the person who puts this sticker up is an absolute idiot is all!!!!

I don't care if I'm over sensitive I just think they're an idiot!!!

Thanks for the replies.............


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## Blinder (2 Feb 2009)

Wally, you original post could actually be view as offensive when you interpret the 'prefect family' as man, woman, boy, girl, which is what you did in when you saw the sign and when you posted.

Therefore you are implying that all other families are not prefect! 

Beauty, as the say, is in the eye of the beholder, and as long as a person views their own family , regardless of how many boys or girls or to quote your original post 'baby which may be handicapped or that type of thing', as perfect who is anyone, including you,  to say otherwise.


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## S.L.F (2 Feb 2009)

sandrat said:


> well i guess if you are the worlds best lover they are wasting money on falsely claiming your title


 
Should I be charging them for using the names.

There is one big problem if it ever came up I might have to prove it.

The question would be would I get to do them seperately or at the same time.



Blinder said:


> Wally, you original post could actually be view as offensive when you interpret the 'prefect family' as man, woman, boy, girl, which is what you did in when you saw the sign and when you posted.
> 
> Therefore you are implying that all other families are not prefect!
> 
> Beauty, as the say, is in the eye of the beholder, and as long as a person views their own family , regardless of how many boys or girls or to quote your original post 'baby which may be handicapped or that type of thing', as perfect who is anyone, including you, to say otherwise.


 
Families are not perfect unless they have at least 4 cats, 1 gold fish, 10 geese, 2 dogs and a live-in nanny.


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## wally (3 Feb 2009)

Blinder said:


> Wally, you original post could actually be view as offensive when you interpret the 'prefect family' as man, woman, boy, girl, which is what you did in when you saw the sign and when you posted.
> 
> Therefore you are implying that all other families are not prefect!
> 
> Beauty, as the say, is in the eye of the beholder, and as long as a person views their own family , regardless of how many boys or girls or to quote your original post 'baby which may be handicapped or that type of thing', as perfect who is anyone, including you, to say otherwise.


 

Unfortunately Blinder you obviously didn't read the original post properly - you will see that I said that the 'Perfect Family' sticker had a PICTURE of a man, woman, girl and boy so was not MY interpretation of the perfect family - it was the sticker creator's interpretation of the perfect family - which is the exact point I was making - so your point is absolutely validating what I ORIGINALLY said - that this should not be portrayed as the perfect family.

I'm glad you agree with me anyway ;0)


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## Blinder (3 Feb 2009)

my apologies


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## nesbitt (3 Feb 2009)

Wally as I said earlier you would want to be a bit of a nerd(ette) to put a 'perfect family' sticker on your car.  I agree that I think of Homer Simpsons' neighbour and shudder...  So glad not to be perfect and you should be too...  All the best.


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## ophelia (4 Feb 2009)

Gianni is right. 'Baby on Board' stickers generated in America (where else); in order to warn fire fighters and paramedics of the possible presence of a baby or small child in a car in the event of an accident.
They have since been corrupted by silly versions : 'Perfect family on board' and worse still 'Guided by Angels' and 'Never go faster than your angels can fly'. Take them with a pinch of salt, on a scale of world annoyances they are way down the list.


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