# What authority or power does next-of-kin have?



## STEINER (28 Nov 2012)

Hi,

what power if any does a next-of-kin have?  Is he/she just a contact in case of emergency?


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## mf1 (28 Nov 2012)

In what context? 

Consent to switch off life support? Authority to make funeral arrangements? Person to be consulted /advised in an emergency? 

There can be conflicting persons who could be described as next of kin. The usual pecking order  would be 
1. Spouse 
2. Non dependent offspring if no spouse 
3. Parent - if no spouse/children 
4. Brother/sister if none of above 

mf


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## Thirsty (29 Nov 2012)

Person can also declare who they wish their 'next-of-kin' to be.  As my father is elderly, my sister who is single & childless always lists me.


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## STEINER (30 Nov 2012)

mf1 said:


> In what context?
> 
> Consent to switch off life support? Authority to make funeral arrangements? Person to be consulted /advised in an emergency?
> 
> ...



Certainly, all 3 of your contexts are relevant to me.  Here is my case...

Elderly relative with 5 offspring ie the 5 siblings.

A sibling is the next-of-kin (NOK) and is worse than useless.  Original NOK was changed as she moved out and married, living 20 km away.  The new NOK is only 1 km away from parent.

NOK rarely answers her mobile phone.  Parent fell down stairs, but still managed to activate alarm.  NOK had phone off.

Parent is immobile, high dependency, needs 24/7 care, in hospital since Easter.  NOK wouldn't even discuss nursing home option, delayed the process for several months.  This is the only option now and a nice nursing home bed has been secured mainly by efforts of other siblings.

During the hospital stay, there were a few emergencies and NOK could not be contacted.

NOK collects DSP pension for parent.  It is not being lodged to bank.

As far as switching off life support, Doctors have broached this subject, as it will become relevant within a year.  NOK would prolong life at whatever cost.  

I suppose the logical solution is for the parent to change NOK, but parent is too submissive.


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## Time (30 Nov 2012)

I have been told when it all boils down to it, the legal precedent for NOK applies. 

So even if I said my parents are now my NOK, my spouse could quite legally overrule them.


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## mf1 (30 Nov 2012)

Logical solution is for those persons who actually do something to close ranks and "squeeze" current holder of the title out. Change contact details ( because really that is all they are) with every point of contact. Make sure Doctors are told who is to be contacted in the event of anything. 

Is is fair to say that you believe this is just about money? You could notify DSP that pension is not being lodged - but who will they pay pension to then? You could be opening up a big, big can of worms. Is it worth it? 

These things are only ever an issue with families that have always had issues. Most families have a natural, default person who takes on and exercises the responsibilities responsibly, with, hopefully, one or more people behind supporting.  

mf


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## SoylentGreen (1 Dec 2012)

STEINER said:


> NOK collects DSP pension for parent. It is not being lodged to bank.


 
In our case we are being told that it is but any attempts to see bank statements to show proof of same and we are told that our elderly parent only wants "her" to see them. We ask our elderly parent and he says that he wants all of his children to be involved.  
The worrying think is that "her" husband is elderly parent's executor.


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## putsch (1 Dec 2012)

To OP I just want to say that this situation is not unusual, it happens even in the "best" families. We're just coming through a similar situation where, to avoid having a sibling who had strange and weird ideas, be the contact person I had to spend an incredible amount of time dealing with nurses, care agencies, consultants, HSE etc etc, so that they could see there were other members of family with saner views on our parent's care and future. It lasted for years and was incredibly draining and divisive. And I had 6 other siblings backing me up (at a distance!).

So by all means get stuck in - visit regularly, if the others agree change the contact point to you, talk/write to doctors nurses everyone you can. Explain you represent the majority view. But be prepared for the fallout - its never easy. You may have regrets either way.

Good luck.


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## Harry31 (1 Dec 2012)

In the case of someone with an intellectual disability who is over 18 the only way "next of kin" have any legal authority to make decisions on that persons behalf is to go to court.  The legislation is woefully inadequete.


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