# Systematic Severe bullying small rural school involving teachers, pupils & BOM.



## Optimistic (30 Jan 2012)

hi all. I have friends whose children are in a case of severe bullying at a rural national school. The school board is made up of teachers and parents of the children who are bullying, severe bullying, and I won't get into the specifics here. So there is no hope of reprieve with the school board.

The teachers are also part of the bullying and are also on the board and to complicate matters  they are related to the bullies, so local politics are at play also.

Can my friends do anything to help address the problem? Can the school be reported to the department of education? Or will the dept. side with the teachers and only exacerbate the situation?

Many parents are not happy and see what is happening, but I am not sure that many/any would speak/join efforts in a small rural community.

Can anything be done? My friends are at their wits end. I could say more, but am cautious in case any of the people involved are members of this forum and if I give more specifics it would add to the situation. 

Please share any thoughts you think would help.


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## Bronte (31 Jan 2012)

What you are saying is that teachers, pupils and parents are all bullies and there is not one normal person in that school that you can go to with your grievences?


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## Newbie! (31 Jan 2012)

> What you are saying is that teachers, pupils and parents are all bullies and there is not one normal person in that school that you can go to with your grievences?


 I wouldnt think this is an enormous stretch of the imagination to be honest.

OP, it is very difficult to give advice without knowing the full situation. In general though, I think you need evidence that bullying is ongoing. Put all your concerns in writing and if there are no replies, threaten to take it directly to the ombudsman for children. You do need to be sure that you have as much detail as possible in writing else it really is a case one childs word against a whole school.
Best of luck with it. 

Read here for the formal procedure re making a complaint: http://www.citizensinformation.ie/e...mary_school/primary_education_life_event.html


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## terrysgirl33 (31 Jan 2012)

While there are a few things you can do, the first thing I would do is pull the child out of the school if this is a possibility at all.


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## Optimistic (31 Jan 2012)

*Re. Bullying*

Hi all, thank you for your replies so far. Bronte, it is complex. I am not saying that all children, teachers and parents in the school are bullies. There are 2//3 families, closely connected to the teachers, involved. One of the parents of one of the children are on the school board as are the teachers. Is it normal practice that teachers are on the board? This obviously makes approaching the board difficult. 
Also, keep in mind it is a small rural community.
Thank you to newbie for your comments. I will definitely check out the website. There are multiple cases of bullying going on. 
What annoys me is that parents trust the education and care of their children to  the school, teachers and any others employed there and the least one expects is that children are educated and treated fairly and with respect. 
Of course I know as a parent that there are times when children need discipline and am not against this and realize in the modern life many parents are very much adverse to discipline. I am of the old school who believe there is place for discipline.This is not what is happening in this situation. For the reasons stated before I will not go into specifics. 
Thanks again for your thoughts and comments


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## terrysgirl33 (31 Jan 2012)

AFAIK, it is normal to have at least one teacher, in their capacity as teacher, on the board of management.  AFAIK, it is entirely possible that a teacher may be there as a parent of a school child.

FWIW, my parents were in a somewhat similar situation with my brother years ago, and I think they helped out the situation by having the 'bully' over to play and making 'friends' with the parents.  I will see if I can find out more.  The principle in this case was not from the area, but saw what was going on as 'normal'.


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## ajapale (31 Jan 2012)

title expanded


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## terrysgirl33 (31 Jan 2012)

You might also want to check out www.rollercoaster.ie and www.magicmum.com for ideas on what to do.


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## Firefly (31 Jan 2012)

Hi Optomistic,

If the principal isn't part of this bullying group s/he would be my first port of call. I would explain what's happening and then I would outline what you are planning to do if it continues. Perhaps s/he could then arrange for someone external to come in and give a class on bullying to the children. Perhaps extreme, but maybe make reference to the case of the (once?) Irish girl in the US last year who took her own life because of bullying.

Failing all of that, I would try and move the children to a different school...not easy though as the bullying may just be postponed until after school.

Sorry to hear of this predicament....one of the worst things a parent must go through I'd imagine..


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## Bronte (31 Jan 2012)

Well if you can't beat them join them. Can your friend become part of the school board, become friendly with the teachers and parents at issue etc.

It's very drastic and difficult to just withdraw a child from a school.


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## ALEXA (31 Jan 2012)

Hi Optimistic,

It is not unusual to have at least 2 teachers on the Board of Management of a school - the Principal and possibly another teacher. I am a retired teacher and sat on the BOM as a deputy head. If you feel there is no teacher in the school who could be approached about the problem you have outlined then I would advise your friend to contact the Manager of the school. This is usually the Parish Rector as in the case of Church of Ireland schools as mine was and I assume the Parish priest in the case of Catholic schools. I am not sure what the situation is with regard to multi=deniminational schools. I am somewhat shocked to learn that some teachers are so biased and unsympathetic that a parent would feel it impossible to reach an agreeable solution to any serious problem within the school.


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## rjt (23 Feb 2012)

Sorry to hear about your case. As a current primary principal, previously of small rural school, now a larger urban one some general suggestions (without more background info can't be more specific):


By law all schools must have anti-bullying policy-ask to see it
Always principal+one teacher on board (a teacher who is a parent may be that teacher, but cannot be an extra teacher on the board)
Don't assume principal knows about bullying by pupils-inform him/her
Bullying by children can be dealt with, but time must be allowed-it will not be solved overnight.
Bullying by teacher very serious allegation, with specific procedure to be followed. To simplify- One must approach teacher first, then principal if no joy, finally chairperson in writing. More to it, but that order is essential.
Chairperson must discuss letter at BOM meeting. Anyone on board related to case must not be present at that meeting, or relevant part of it.


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## PaddyBloggit (23 Feb 2012)

+ 1 

Has the school a website? If it has, the Anti-Bullying Policy may be online by them so have a read.

Follow the correct route re. the Complaints' Procedure.

Has the school a Parents' Association (it should as all schools are now obliged to facilitate the provision of one).

You could contact the the National Parents' Council for advice:

[broken link removed]

They'll steer you in the right direction.

They have a dedicated Helpline to deal with bullying:

[broken link removed]

They have a document with regard to bullying and what a parent can do here:

[broken link removed]


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## j1mb0b (20 Apr 2012)

The situation facing your friends seems to be a lot like those where the  managers responsible for resolving the situation are in fact those  doing the bullying. While it is possible to seek redress by following  procedure and approaching the bully's superior, it may not work and can  make the situation even worse for the recipient of the bullying. 

In  addition, where the bullying is non-physical, the emotions involved can  make it difficult to provide specific details about has been done to  make them feel the way they do. Even if children can provide precise  details of what has been done, it is very much the teacher's word  against theirs. 

There seems to be very little parents can do, though in one case  recently in Ohio, the parents of a 14 year old girl with special needs  managed to obtain evidence to support their daughter's  version of events (you will need to Google for the link). Despite very  clear evidence of professional  misconduct on the part of the teacher, she remained in post. Given the  circumstances you  describe, it seems unlikely that the outcome in your friends case would  be any different, even if there was proof of unacceptable conduct.

It  is a sad indictment of the system that there is still huge scope for  teachers to have a very negative effect on those for whom they are  responsible, and there is little that parents can do to mitigate this. Hopefully a  move to another school is not out of the question.


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