# I've just had an AMAZING job offer!



## Blueberry08 (28 Mar 2008)

Don't any of you *dare* try to steal this position from me. And those of you who might suggest (1) I have too much time on my hands.....well,  and (2) that you've seen this done a zillion times - you’d wouldn’t be wrong.


Email 1:

Good Day Sir/Madam

My name is Mr Bobby Fox, Managing Director of ACTEXO TEXTILE COMPANY LTD.Located in the United Sate Of America. My company is looking for a trustworthy representative in England that will serve as a trustworthy officer to our client/customers over their in England.This position pays a minimum of £300 daily, its part-time position.

YOUR TAX
1, Receive payment on behalf of our company from new and existing clients.
2, Process payment at your financial institution(Bank).
3, Deduct £300 from each payment you process.
4, Send the balance to our Cashiers details Via Western Union Money
Transfer.
If interested send us an email to mr_bobby_fox@yahoo.co.uk including the necessary
information below.
1.FULL NAMES:
2.RESIDENTIAL ADDRESS:
3.STATE:
4.POST CODE:
5.SEX:
6.AGE:
7.PHONE NUMBER:
8.Fax Number:
9.OCCUPATION :
10.PRESENT COUNTRY:

Regards
Mr Bobby Fox
ACTEXO TEXTILE COMPANY




My reply:

Dear Mr Bobby,

Hello! I am honoured that the Managing Director of such a prestigious company would write to me personally! I would LOVE to work for you!

Here are my details:

1.FULL NAMES: Robert Cedric Peel
2.RESIDENTIAL ADDRESS: Broadway, London, SW1H OBG
3.STATE: London, England
4.POST CODE: SW1H OBG
5.SEX: Male
6.AGE: 47
7.PHONE NUMBER: 020 7230 1212
8.Fax Number: -
9.OCCUPATION : Hairdresser
10.PRESENT COUNTRY: England

Looking forward to hearing from you Mr Bobby!

Sincerely,

Robert





Email 2:

Good Day Robert

How are yoou doing today and how is your week going, hope everything is on the bright side, i am so glad for your prompt response regarding our company's mail to you today, Note that your details has been filed in the company's Receiving agent profile and now you are fully a Payment Agent of ACTEXO TEXTILE COMPANY.

Robert  i want you to know that all transactions between our company and our clients are made VIA wire bank transfer as we belive thats is the safest way to receive money  and we make sure that the safety of our Receiving agents comes first.

ACTEXO TEXTILE COMPANY is a company with so many branches in Asia, Europe, Nothern America and Africa, basically you have been subjected to work with the African Branch, so any payment which will be made to your bank account, ur duty is to disburse the payments and send them to our Western African Branch VIA Western Union transfer.

This coming week we have 3 clients that are going to make payment into your account.this will prove how trustworthy you are,once again you are  welcome to ACTEXO TEXTILE COMPANY. i will give you a call today as soon as i am less busy.

Please get back to me with your bank accoint informations like this below.

BANK NAME:
ACCOUNT HOLDERS NAME:
ACCOUNT NUMBER:
SORT CODE:

I do hope that you understand all i have said, please if you have any further questions please dont hesitate to let me know, better-still i will be waiting for your next mail so i can let you knw the next update.

Please get back to me today.

Best Regards
Mr Bobby Fox
ACTEXO TEXTILE COMPANY.






My reply:

Hello Mr Bobby!

Thank you for your prompt reply! I am SO excited about working for your company, especially in Africa! I LOVE AFRICA!

Will I get the chance to travel to Africa? Will I get to see penguins?

I will be very happy to give you all my bank account details, no problem at all! But would you mind calling me in the morning at 020 7230 1212 - just ask for Robert Peel. I just like to hear the voice of my new boss! Do you have a nice voice? I hope when you talk to me you will like my voice and be confident that I will be a loyal and trustworthy worker!

Thank you Mr Bobby, I look forward to hearing from you tomorrow!

Sincerely,

Robert



Yup, I think this job is mine - let the money roll in!


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## stir crazy (28 Mar 2008)

> Yup, I think this job is mine - let the money roll in!



Just in case someone is stupid enough to believe the email . This is a scam designed to milk your bank account using your personal and bank details.

There are so many out there who are stupid enough to give bank account details to that guy, lol.


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## Blueberry08 (28 Mar 2008)

stir crazy said:


> There are so many out there who are stupid enough to give bank account details to that guy, lol.



I'm just clinging to the hope that he rings that number......it's Scotland Yard (as is the address). What I wouldn't give to hear him asking to speak to Robert Peel.


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## ninsaga (28 Mar 2008)

Great reply Blueberry - it made me laugh - I do hope you get to see the penguins in Africa some day though


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## Simeon (28 Mar 2008)

Excellent Blueberry! Are these the famous Penguins of the Kalahari written about by Prince Charles' guru and fruitcake extraordinaire Sir Laurens Van der Post?


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## Purple (28 Mar 2008)

Excellent


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## csirl (28 Mar 2008)

It would be even more funny if you gave the name and phone number of the head of the fraud squad.


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## tallpaul (28 Mar 2008)

Here's someone who REALLY likes to toy with these guys...


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## TreeTiger (28 Mar 2008)

_Well, I'm willing to share my job offer from the "ASIA TRADING COMPANY" whose email address showed up as "atc.c51 @verizon.net" rather than the yahoo address given in the email text.  I suppose such a company would have more than one email address though.  Sadly I'm too busy to take up this offer, but other AAMers may know what to do with it?  _

Dear Friend,
How are you today? I am YANG HONG, I work with (ASIA TRADING COMPANY)in conjunction with recruit Express, We are looking for People to serve as Payment Officers on behalf of our company.
DUTY:
The payment officer receives payments from our customers located within their business area (CITY,STATE,COUNTRY)he/she will report directly to the payments and money control office by sending him,email.
QUALIFICATION:
The position does not require any educational qualification but a bachelors degree or very good high school record will be an added advantage,no experience is needed but should be able to speak his/her language fluently as well as understand an extra language will be an added advantage. The individual should be highly motivated, sensitive, being a meticulous person is an added advantage.Applicants with Company names have a higher hand  compared to others.
NOTE:
This Job is a part-time Job and has been designed in such a way that it does not affect your regular daily work Application deadline/Expiry:Two weeks after the broadcast of this message.Salary range: (Fixed)$3,500:00 to $5,000:00 Monthly Plus 10% of every payments received excluding any Taxes or Cheque/check clearing fees. To apply, send referencing position number # 117212 to the employment manager in U.K London. Contact Person: DAVID WOOD Email:dd_w2007@yahoo.co.uk You should also remember to state your referring agent in the e-mail for easy identification.
Thanks for taking time to read our offer.
My Regards,
Mr. YANG HONG( REFERRING AGENT)
ASIA TRADING COMPANY
Copyright Reserved
2008


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## Teabag (28 Mar 2008)

ninsaga said:


> Great reply Blueberry - it made me laugh - I do hope you get to see the penguins in Africa some day though



I saw penguins in Namibia once. Never expected to see them there.

http://www.penguins.cl/african-penguins.htm


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## Blueberry08 (28 Mar 2008)

He rang the number!! 


*Good Day Robert.*

*Thanks for your soonest reply.But i really do not understand some thing robert.I called you and the number you gave me was a police stations number.anyway i asked after you and they said they cant find you.*

*Please i want you to get back to me with your mobile number.*

*Once again thanks for your soonest reply.*


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## Graham_07 (28 Mar 2008)

Blueberry08 said:


> He rang the number!!
> 
> 
> *Good Day Robert.*
> ...


 
Maybe you need to give him the number of the C.A.B. !


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## Blueberry08 (28 Mar 2008)

csirl said:


> It would be even more funny if you gave the name and phone number of the head of the fraud squad.



Done 

Dear Mr Bobby!

I am so ANGRY with the person who did not find me so I could talk to you! The problem, I think, is that I am known as Basher at work so it would seem that the person did not know my real name! I am sorry for the inconvenience this caused you and I sincerely hope it has not damaged my hopes of working for you! 

For religious reasons I do not have a mobile phone but if you ring my direct line -  020 7239 7272 - I will be waiting for you! 

One thing I wanted to ask: I have accounts in three banks, Barclays, Nat West and the Royal Bank of Scotland - should I give you the details of all the account numbers or do you just need one? 

Maybe the Nat West or Royal Bank of Scotland account would be better because I only use my Barclays account occasionally for big purchases (houses, yachts, that kind of thing), it's where I keep the money my Great Aunt Aggie left me. 

Just one more question: do you know yet what date I will leave for Africa? Should I book the hotel myself or will you? If you are booking it would you mind asking them to make sure I have hypoallergenic pillows in my room and scent-free soap in the bathroom?

I will take my camera so I can photograph the penguins! I am SO excited!

Thank you Mr Bobby, looking forward to your call this afternoon,

Sincerely,

Robert


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## truthseeker (28 Mar 2008)

Blueberry08 said:


> He rang the number!!
> 
> 
> *Good Day Robert.*
> ...


 
hehehehehehehe - brilliant!!


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## Blueberry08 (28 Mar 2008)

tallpaul said:


> Here's someone who REALLY likes to toy with these guys...



I'll try to find the link to the best one I have _ever_ seen, it was spectacular! Does anyone remember it - it was an American guy who got one of those emails from the African 'relative' of a hugely wealthy guy who died 'recently'. 
They needed someone's help to access the money and offered a tasty cut if he agreed to have the money transferred to his account, etc, etc.

Any way, the American guy strung them along for weeks and weeks, they even turned up at an airport in South Africa (?) to meet him...needless to say he was sitting at his computer back home. It was hilarious stuff.


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## Caveat (28 Mar 2008)

You're _terrible _Muriel...err...Blueberry.


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## csirl (28 Mar 2008)

How about the following reply:

"My mobile phone is not working at present - this is why I am using the public phone box at the local police station.

But my fax is working. I can give you all the details you require if you fax me through a form with a return fax number. My fax number is +33 4 72 44 71 63.

I would be grateful if you could do this today as I will be away for the next few days.

Again, thank you for your kind job offer,

regards etc."

The fax number is Interpols crime reporting fax number.


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## Blueberry08 (28 Mar 2008)

csirl said:


> How about the following reply:
> 
> "My mobile phone is not working at present - this is why I am using the public phone box at the local police station.
> 
> ...




Suuuuuperb!

Had to alter the reply a bit because I've already told him I don't have a mobile phone for religious reasons.

So, just sent:

Dear Mr Bobby,

I have to leave the salon at the station this afternoon for an emergency haircut so will be away from my phone and email - would it be possible for you to let me know by fax which bank account details you would prefer?

My answering machine at home is not working but you could send your reply to my home fax - the number is +33 4 72 44 71 63. I will get the fax when I am home this evening and will immediately forward you the details. 

Thank you Mr Bobby,

Sincerely,

Robert


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## truthseeker (28 Mar 2008)

Blueberry08 said:


> Suuuuuperb!
> 
> Had to alter the reply a bit because I've already told him I don't have a mobile phone for religious reasons.
> 
> ...


 
The salon at the station!!!! Im rolling around laughing


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## BillK (28 Mar 2008)

There is a colony of Jackass Penguins at Boulders Beach just outside Simonstown down in the Cape.


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## Blueberry08 (28 Mar 2008)

Okay, Mr Bobby has replied:

*Good Day Robert.*

*Thanks for getting back to me.i called you again and i could not get you because i was told you are not in.*

*Please tell me again were you work?*

*Please i want you to get back to me with all your bank account informations.*

*And also dont you have a number were i can get you direct.



*Does this mean he wants the details of the account where Great Aunt Aggie's money is?


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## ClubMan (28 Mar 2008)

Blueberry08 said:


> *And also dont you have a number were i can get you direct.*


Could you give him the number of a premium sex line or something?


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## Blueberry08 (29 Mar 2008)

ClubMan said:


> Could you give him the number of a premium sex line or something?



You sir are a genius!

So....


Dear Mr Bobby,

We are having no luck at communicating! I am wondering if fate is against us! Maybe the heavens are telling us this is not to be! I hope not!

As I said I had to leave the salon in the station to do an emergency haircut (as part of my Bobs on the Beat service) but I am so proud to tell you that it worked out magnificently - my client chose easy-meche woven highlights and lowlights with a touch of plum, he thought they were very arresting!

Mr Bobby, I hope some day you will allow me do your hair! You don't have to choose plum, I also do burgundy. Would you like that?

But back to our communication problem: I have the perfect solution! Saturday is Bobs on the Beat's busiest day so I won't be in the station salon at all - but my perming technician Clint will allow me use his mobile phone so if you call 01740 XXX XXX you can give me instructions about my bank accounts!

What I would also like to do is give you a small gift as a sign of my appreciation for you showing such trust in me and offering me such a prestigious position. My Great Aunt Aggie would be very proud if she was alive, which she isn't. What you have done for me makes me think of my favourite song:

You raise me up, so I can stand on mountains;
You raise me up, to walk on stormy seas;
I am strong, when I am on your shoulders;
You raise me up... To more than I can be.

You raise me me up Mr Bobby so I can stand on mountains.

Would £1000 be acceptable to you as a gift? It's what Great Aunt Aggie would want me to do, especially when she left me more money than I need. If you could email me your bank account details I will forward you the money immediately.

Again, I cannot wait to work for you! I am SO excited!

Sincerely,

Robert


PS Do you know if penguins bite? I don't want to get too close in case they do. I had a bad experience once with a similar animal (I think it was a gnu) and I don't want my trip to Africa to be ruined, especially when I will have so much work to do.


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## Caveat (29 Mar 2008)

Very inventive and a great saga Blueberry - but jaysus you're really getting into this


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## Blueberry08 (29 Mar 2008)

Caveat said:


> Very inventive and a great saga Blueberry - but jaysus you're really getting into this



But I fear the saga may end here, unless Mr Bobby appreciates phoning a premium line that boasts: "All Tastes Catered For - Grannys to Trannys." Great Aunt Aggie would be appalled.


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## Simeon (29 Mar 2008)

Hey Blueberry! Give up the day job, fire your analyst and take up the pen. It's brilliant. Certainly the makings of a book. Keep up the good work!


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## Blueberry08 (30 Mar 2008)

And on (and on) it goes. Mr Bobby just doesn't know when to give up - maybe that's why he's such a successful businessman?




On 30/03/2008, *Mr Bobby Fox* <mr_bobby_fox@yahoo.co.uk> wrote: *
Hello Robert.*

*Thank for your wonderful Email.But i am still not happy with you.I dont no why i keep trying to call you and i am not getting through.*

*I called the number you gave to me and it was a wrong number???*

*Please get back to me with your account information like this below.*

*BANK NAME:*
*ACCOUNT HOLDERS NAME:*
*ACCOUNT NUMBER:*
*SORT CODE:*

*Please get back to me with all your bank account like this above.*

*Once again thanks for your soonest reply.*

*Best Regards
Mr Bobby Fox
ACTEXO TEXTILE COMPANY



*


Dear Mr Bobby,

I am sorry but I feel very let down by you. 

I waited all day yesterday for you to ring Clint's number - I even asked Clint to set his phone to vibrate in his pocket in case we wouldn't hear it with the Bobs on the Beat hair dryers. He agreed to this, even though he says the vibrating makes his eyes water.

But you never did call.

This was a big disappointment to me because I thought we had grown to trust each other.

I thought of Great Aunt Aggie's favourite Megadeth song:

Lost in a dream
Nothing is what it seems
Searching my head
For the words that you said
Tears filled my eyes
As we said our last goodbyes
The sad scene replays
Of you walking away

The only way I feel I can trust your word again is if you offer a gesture of friendship.

So, if you send me a short four line poem about Great Aunt Aggie I will know I can trust your sincerity. Just something simple, like: 

Great Aunt Aggie was a very nice lady,
Much, much nicer than her sister Sadie.
etc

If you do this for me Mr Bobby I will send you all the bank account details you need, immediately.

It's up to you Mr Bobby. Great Aunt Aggie meant everything to me, if you can show that you respect her memory then I know I can trust you.

Sincerely,

Robert


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## truthseeker (31 Mar 2008)

Ask Mr Bobby for his phone number then post it on some kind of seedy bloggers board so he will receive many many calls


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## ClubMan (31 Mar 2008)

Blueberry08 said:


> But I fear the saga may end here, unless Mr Bobby appreciates phoning a premium line that boasts: "All Tastes Catered For - Grannys to Trannys." Great Aunt Aggie would be appalled.





Blueberry08 said:


> *I called the number you gave to me and it was a wrong number???*


Fair play to him - he's very discreet. Maybe it's a genuine offer?


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## Simeon (1 Apr 2008)

Does it not bother you that he could get into trouble if Mrs. Bobby finds out?


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## paddyodoors (8 Apr 2008)

"Please write me a short 4 line poem...."

brilliant - if he attempts that i'll be in stitches.

I saw a program a month or so ago where something similar was happening - basically a room full of people bashing out similar emails - but by using stolen identities, to start romances.

The part I watched showed where a french blokes photo was used  to set up some american women - who full on thought she was getting married to this guy - and of course had been sending money over. 

They tracked down both the women, the french fella and the scammers.

scary stuff to see how easily people get sucked in - and how industrial the emailing was.

can imagine the room full of guys all trying to rhyme some words for Aunt Aggie!!

Paddy


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## Blueberry08 (9 Apr 2008)

paddyodoors said:


> "Please write me a short 4 line poem...."
> 
> brilliant - if he attempts that i'll be in stitches.
> 
> can imagine the room full of guys all trying to rhyme some words for Aunt Aggie!!



I'm _still_ waiting for the poem. In fact, Mr Bobby hasn't replied once since I politely asked that he pay a poetic tribute to Aunt Aggie. I would have given him all the details he requested if he'd come up with something simple, like:

Aunt Aggie was the grandest of ladies, 
she drove a 1976 Mercedes, 
She was tremendously rich,
the lucky auld b***h,
and I would very much like her money so please email me the details of the bank account where you keep the money the auld bag left you. Yours, Mr Bobby.


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## sam h (9 Apr 2008)

Blueberry - this is brilliant.  Your talents are wasted in your day job.  My personal favourite bit is the vibrating phone making your collegues eyes water!!


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## Welfarite (10 Apr 2008)

BillK said:


> There is a colony of Jackass Penguins at Boulders Beach just outside Simonstown down in the Cape.


 
...which, no doubt, Blueberry knows about. hence the subtle reference to "penguins" in his replies!


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## Megan (11 Apr 2008)

http://www.recruitireland.com/job/?JobID=10012942&arrow.x=9&arrow.y=12
Another Amazing Job Offer here.


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## gipimann (11 Apr 2008)

That would be the same job offer mentioned in this thread.....
http://www.askaboutmoney.com/showthread.php?t=78945


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## shootingstar (14 Apr 2008)

This is by far the best thread I have ever read on Shooting the breeze - AAM. 

Hilarous, i couldnt make something like that up even if I tried... 



SS


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