# Dress code for wedding



## liaconn (7 Apr 2010)

My sister has been invited to a wedding and the invitation stipulates that there is a red, black and white theme so guests must wear one or a combination of these colours. Has anyone ever heard of anything like this before? Sis is seriously hacked off as she's pretty broke, has nothing suitable in these colours and will now have to go out and buy a brand new outfit even though she has a couple of hardly worn wedding outfits in her wardrobe that she had intended to wear.


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## Sunny (7 Apr 2010)

Why do people do that rubbish? Who do they think they are?


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## RMCF (7 Apr 2010)

Does she have to go?

If anyone I knew came out with that nonsense I'd politely refuse.


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## ivuernis (7 Apr 2010)

Red, white and black - I would suggest she borrow a Manchester United kit, otherwise go with one of her existing outfits.


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## Shawady (7 Apr 2010)

Never heard of that. 
Have been invited to a black-tie wedding before. I do not own a tuxedo, but they gave a voucher for Blacktie so it at least helped a bit.


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## liaconn (7 Apr 2010)

The bride is a designer and is planning a white cake with red design, black and white table settings with touches of red etc etc. I know it will probably look spectacular, but at expense and inconvenience to the guests.


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## VOR (7 Apr 2010)

Rubbish is right. How controlling a person would you have to be to try and specify what colours the guests wear? 
If it were me I would either a) pass on the wedding or b) wear something ridiculous.

I wanted to wear a fedora and carry a cane to an August black tie wedding of a wife's friend. I have no issue with black tie in Winter or for evening wear but not at 1pm on a nice summer's day.
The wife talked me out of it (translation: nagged). I turned up at the church and the bride's family were in normal suits. Some didn't even wear a tie. And they were in the pictures!!! Even the groom was not in black tie or tux. He wore normal wedding rental suit.
I was so sorry I didn't bring the cane and fedora then!!!


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## Caveat (7 Apr 2010)

Silly pompous horse vomit.

Just don't go would be my advice.


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## Shawady (7 Apr 2010)

liaconn said:


> The bride is a designer and is planning a white cake with red design, black and white table settings with touches of red etc etc. I know it will probably look spectacular, but at expense and inconvenience to the guests.


 
It will be hard to make out the guests from the furniture! Sounds like they will be well camouflaged.


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## Sunny (7 Apr 2010)

Caveat said:


> Silly pompous horse vomit.


 
So you don't agree with it?


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## MANTO (7 Apr 2010)

Tell her to get a cheap all-in-one pvc red cat suit and smile for every picture being taken.


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## ney001 (7 Apr 2010)

I thought the feckin stupidity of the celtic tiger days was gone! 

I seriously wouldn't go if it was me, but if your sister really wants to go, then see if she could perhaps borrow a black dress?? maybe buy a cheap old red handbag or something? - You can get something fairly plain and cheap in black and do it up with a red ribbon or something??

As for bride and groom, I would suggest that your sister find the tackiest, ugliest cheapest vase she can find in black and white, stick a red bow on it and spend the money that she would have given them on an outfit for herself!


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## ney001 (7 Apr 2010)

MANTO said:


> Tell her to get a cheap all-in-one pvc red cat suit and smile for every picture being taken.



This bespoke design looks well with the black boots!

[broken link removed]


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## Shawady (7 Apr 2010)

Group wedding photo may look something like this photo.

http://www.rte.ie/news/2010/0407/thailand.html


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## DeeFox (7 Apr 2010)

I think it's an interesting idea - if I was getting married I wouldn't dream of it though.  There's bound to be a few awkward relatives who refuse to get into the spirit of it.
Surely she can borrow something?  I think with black that there is leeway to wear something less dressy than normal wedding attire.  I imagine most women have at least one black dress lurking in their wardrobe.


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## ney001 (7 Apr 2010)

DeeFox said:


> There's bound to be a few awkward relatives who refuse to get into the spirit of it.



Colour me awkward so! -wedding bride and groom can do whatever they like and wear whatever they want to but to expect guests to do the same shows really poor judgment and indeed taste! I think fancy dress and dress codes at weddings are just tacky & usually revolve around a bride who will do whatever she can to make her wedding stand out from that of her friends! Sad in my opinion but that's just me!


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## liaconn (7 Apr 2010)

Why is it the relatives who are being 'awkward'?  Surely it's the bride who's being awkward, not allowing her guests to wear what they choose to the wedding?
I've advised my sister not to bother going. Apart from the dress code the wedding is, surprise surprise, being held in Galway even though the bride is from Dublin, the groom is from Kildare and they both live and work in Dublin.


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## Ciaraella (7 Apr 2010)

This is just totally selfish and inconsiderate of the bride and groom. I can understand specifying 'formalwear' so that everyone is nicely spruced up but specifying a colour is not fair. I'd agree with the poster who suggested that you reduce what you were going to spend on a present and spend it on an outfit instead or if the couple are not close friends i'd pass on the invitation. I love the idea of wearing a man utd kit though!


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## ivuernis (7 Apr 2010)

liaconn said:


> Why is it the relatives who are being 'awkward'?  Surely it's the bride who's being awkward, not allowing her guests to wear what they choose to the wedding?



Totally agree. People can end up spending a lot of money travelling to weddings, they may have to take time of work, plus there's a present to buy also. It's selfish to then expect guests to incur even more expense by having them arrive in a constrained dress code. In the spirit of their designer wedding I trust the food will be of equally high standard with not a beef or salmon dish in sight?


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## purpeller (7 Apr 2010)

Do you think your sister would be turned away if she just showed up in whatever she was planning to wear originally?

Agree with the other posters, such a lot rubbish to dictate colour.


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## truthseeker (7 Apr 2010)

I think the bride and groom are entitled to dictate whatever they like for their own wedding, that they are paying for, and if anyone doesnt like it, well then dont go!!


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## Birroc (7 Apr 2010)

truthseeker said:


> I think the bride and groom are entitled to dictate whatever they like for their own wedding, that they are paying for, and if anyone doesnt like it, well then dont go!!


 
The bride and groom get well paid too


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## liaconn (7 Apr 2010)

truthseeker said:


> I think the bride and groom are entitled to dictate whatever they like for their own wedding, that they are paying for, and if anyone doesnt like it, well then dont go!!


 
It does put people in an awkward position, though. Presumably she has also invited aunts and old family friends who will feel they're being rude to her parents if they don't attend. This came up on another thread and a lot of people pointed out that it's not always that easy to refuse a wedding invitation without hurting feelings or causing family arguments.


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## truthseeker (7 Apr 2010)

Birroc said:


> The bride and groom get well paid too


 
But do they? I think its a myth myself. I held a party to celebrate my wedding (actual deed was done abroad with just myself and himself), and we had 100 odd guests - the money we received as gifts didnt even cover one third of the cost of the party (venue, food, dj etc...).

Not that we minded, we werent factoring gifts received against costs - but the point is - weddings cost the bride and groom, and more than likely cost a lot more than they could ever hope to receive back as gifts.


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## DeeFox (7 Apr 2010)

truthseeker said:


> I think the bride and groom are entitled to dictate whatever they like for their own wedding, that they are paying for, and if anyone doesnt like it, well then dont go!!


 
I agree with this - and it's not as if it is a very restrictive dress code.  Black is very commonly worn to weddings.


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## truthseeker (7 Apr 2010)

liaconn said:


> It does put people in an awkward position, though. Presumably she has also invited aunts and old family friends who will feel they're being rude to her parents if they don't attend. This came up on another thread and a lot of people pointed out that it's not always that easy to refuse a wedding invitation without hurting feelings or causing family arguments.


 
I dont disagree but if you want to impose dress codes, colour codes etc... then the risk you take is that people wont go OR that they go and ignore the dress code OR that they grudgingly go and are moany about it on the day.

Ultimately its the bride and grooms big day, they are paying for it, let them do what they like.

(Personally I do think a colour code is a bit silly - but in principle I think couples should be entitled to do what they want if theyre paying).


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## becky (7 Apr 2010)

I do think it's a load of auld cack but I think a lot of the wedding stuff is a load of auld cack.

But I agree it's not too restrictive.  She could borrow a black dress off someone if she doesn't have it herself.  Into a material shop for a red cape thing that loads of women wear to weddings and buy a cheap red clutch/white pearls in pennys or H&M or just wear all black and red lipstick.


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## haminka1 (7 Apr 2010)

sounds like a serious case of a bridezilla!
btw, they have very nice black jeans leggins and black and white checkered blouses in penny's - will set her back some 24 euro - also, why doesn't she have a look in charity shops such as oxfam or enable ireland, if she wants to attend? they tend to have a rather nice selection of dresses


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## gunnerfitzy (7 Apr 2010)

i'd definately go with the idea of reducing the cost of the present and buying something nice to wear. sure its their day and they can impose these silly dress codes but its your money and you can chose what you spend it on.


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## Complainer (7 Apr 2010)

liaconn said:


> My sister has been invited to a wedding and the invitation stipulates that there is a red, black and white theme so guests must wear one or a combination of these colours.



No end of possibilities there. She could just wrap herself in the Irish Times (black, white and read all over)? Or procure a freshly removed zebra skin? Or a nun's habit with scarlet lipstick?


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## annR (8 Apr 2010)

+1 although yeah I think it's a load of pretentious rubbish, she can get around it somehow and enjoy the day.  Even if it's just to have said ' I was once at a wedding where we all had to wear black white or red'


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## Kine (8 Apr 2010)

Complainer said:


> No end of possibilities there. She could just wrap herself in the Irish Times (black, white and read all over)? Or procure a freshly removed zebra skin? Or a nun's habit with scarlet lipstick?


 
Ah the old ones are always teh best...


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## snowdrop (8 Apr 2010)

*dress code nonsense*

easy solution . . . black burqa


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## corkgal (9 Apr 2010)

truthseeker said:


> (Personally I do think a colour code is a bit silly - but in principle I think couples should be entitled to do what they want if theyre paying).



Most of the money spent on an average wedding is spend by the guests, presents accommodation, new clothes etc.

I simply would not go.


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## Leper (11 Apr 2010)

The couple getting married - sorry the bride-to-be - wants her wedding to stand out from the rest.  One of these ways is to think up some caper e.g. colour dress code.

If you wanna go then you have to fall in.  The bride wants the day of her life to be the day of her life.

We may not agree with her, but it is her big day.


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## michaelm (12 Apr 2010)

liaconn said:


> Sis is seriously hacked off as she's pretty broke . .


Now she has a good excuse not to go (and if broke then no present either).  Sounds like a load of This post will be deleted if not edited to remove bad language to me but each to their own. I wouldn't go.


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## Milly (12 Apr 2010)

Is the food going to be themed red, white and black also? I'm thinking lots of ketchup and burnt offerings!


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## Thirsty (14 Apr 2010)

> Black is very commonly worn to weddings


Only in recent years - time was when neither black nor white were considered 'proper' at weddings since black was for funerals and only the bride wore white.


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