# Getting Rid of Lodger..Am I reasonable?



## Lauren (30 Nov 2007)

Have had a lodger in now for three months. Have found it much more stressful than anticipated and have decided to give him notice to go in the New Year (giving 8 weeks). Reasons as follows:

The smell of foot odour coming from his room is overpowering...Having mentioned it subtly and recently more overtly, it hasn't changed and it makes me heave every time I pass the room! Its starting to permeate into the rest of my lovely apartment.

He regularly uses food and cleaning items that I have purchased despite me clarifying on a few occasions that he is not in 'digs', he is renting a room only!

He has left the apartment unlocked on a few occasions, have spoken to him about this but it seems to go in one ear and out the other.

Hasn't cleaned the room in three months (to my knowledge) or the bathroom that he uses that is also the guest bathroom. 

So am I being reasonable in getting rid?


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## Conshine (30 Nov 2007)

Very nice of you to give him 8 weeks - I would have given the minimum (as in the contract???)

You certainly will be crossed off hix Xmas card / present list - thats guaranteed!


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## NHG (30 Nov 2007)

You are doing the right thing, give notice straight away. Its your home and if you are not happy living there its time to sort it out.


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## Lauren (30 Nov 2007)

Thanks guys..I feel like a b**ch but its my place after all...
I'm worried that the bed he sleeps in will be stinking and I'll have to get rid of the mattress! Do you think its reasonable to take the cost out of his deposit?


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## pinkyBear (30 Nov 2007)

With regards to the tennent - you are doing the right thing - I have had loads of experience with getting rid of tennents - I would give 4 weeks personaly.

Another thing for the sake of an arguement, if he/she is up to date with bills and stuff return the deposit as soon - you want rid so don't prolong your agony any longer.....


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## pc7 (30 Nov 2007)

Don't feel bad, its your home it hasn't worked out c'est la vie! I don't know if lack of personal cleaning standards would work to keep some of his deposit, it might just be considered acceptable wear and tear in terms of lease etc.  A few squirts of fabreeze, open windows and a good clean should help


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## Paulone (30 Nov 2007)

The bed thing might not be necessary so be careful of that - unless there is tangible damage to it that makes it unusable.

I was a tenant who was told that a deduction was being taken from my deposit to take account of 'wear on the stair carpet' during three months I was resident in a house. I acquainted myself with my rights and made sure that I got the full amount back.

You don't have to put up with someone who doesn't clean and who isn't taking care of your place - sounds like you've given them every opportunity - but things could take another turn for the worse if he demands the money and gets himself some representation. Be quite careful of that.

A friend of mine rented rooms and always had a friendly but quite clear chat when someone arrived to lay down some ground rules. Even with that, there's no accounting for folk and sometimes it still didn't work.


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## Lauren (30 Nov 2007)

What about tangible smell?


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## pc7 (30 Nov 2007)

Paulone said:


> I was a tenant who was told that a deduction was being taken from my deposit to take account of 'wear on the stair carpet' during three months I was resident in a house


 
he he he Paulone you must go through shoes like no ones business!


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## pinkyBear (30 Nov 2007)

> open windows and a good clean should help


 - trust me I was there as well... a very smelly tennent and the answer is above....


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## jrewing (30 Nov 2007)

You're being very reasonable by giving 8 weeks notice.


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## ragazza (30 Nov 2007)

He sounds like an absolute pig, and you should get rid of him in the minimum legal time possible. There is no need to give him 8 weeks.

It sounds like he has absolutely no respect for you, or your belongings or property. How dare he touch your food etc, when you have repeatedly asked him not to? I cant imagine the state of the bathroom if he hasn't cleaned it in 3 months. And the fact that he leaves the door unlocked takes the biscuit - is this when he is inside the apartment, or does he walk out and leave it unlocked? That is reason itself to get rid of him immediately.


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## aircobra19 (30 Nov 2007)

Put a spring on the front door and lock that can't be out on a latch. 

Get rid of them. Why put up with a slob.


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## jazzhead (1 Dec 2007)

yes you are


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## Lauren (1 Dec 2007)

Yes, he's left the apt unlocked when he left for a weekend...so it was like that for a few days....Thanks everyone..I feel like less of a bit*ch now...I'm just not enjoying the experience at all so its time to vote him off the island  lol


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## BOXtheFOX (2 Dec 2007)

Is it such a problem that someone you are renting a room to makes himself a cup of tea or a sandwich every now and then......


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## Sue Ellen (2 Dec 2007)

BOXtheFOX said:


> Is it such a problem that someone you are renting a room to makes himself a cup of tea or a sandwich every now and then......



If you're not trolling can you refer everyone to the post that previously mentions the tenant only making themselves a cup of tea or sandwich every now and then?


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## smree (2 Dec 2007)

BOXtheFOX said:


> Is it such a problem that someone you are renting a room to makes himself a cup of tea or a sandwich every now and then......



It is a problem when they aren't using items that they have purchased themselves.


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## Thrifty (3 Dec 2007)

By all means give the tenant notice if you are unhappy with him but i have to say am suprised at the strenght of some of the replys, given we don't actually know the other person. I acknowledge leaving the place unlocked is worrying and wrong but in relation to the other accusations i feel they are situations where one persons view can be very different to the another. I'm not saying this is the case but i have come across friends/acquaintances who have lived with landlords and have found them unreasonable in their expectations. They have just bought a new flat and are a bit obsessive about everything looking like a show flat. The tenant is not supposed to be seen or heard. Cups, plates, glasses have to be stacked in a particular way etc. You didn't say what your tenant has taken food wise- drop of milk? - if he has taken some of your cleaning products maybe he has cleaned his room and/or bathroom.  Isn't it unfair that you make the accusation that he hasn't cleaned (to your knowledge) in three months - are you always there? You didn't say the bathroom was actually in a state just that you hadn't seen it cleaned.


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## shootingstar (3 Dec 2007)

jazzhead said:


> yes you are



??



BOXtheFOX said:


> Is it such a problem that someone you are renting a room to makes himself a cup of tea or a sandwich every now and then......



bit on the smart side are`nt we? I would have a problem with my flat mate was taking my food out of my cupboard and helping themselves. I dont think the OP has stated anything about him using her tea bag?! I think what she was trying to say is the lodger is using her things instead of him using his own stuff. Which im, inclined to agree with OP. I dont think i would like anyone to be using my stuff in my home. I certainly wouldnt do that to anyone... 

Maybe for future references OP should consider using a kitty for mutual items such as cleaning products, toilet rolls, milk etc...each person throws in a tenner a week say...  

Boot him out. smelly feet = barf!!


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## Lauren (3 Dec 2007)

Just to clarify...things that have been used include tea, bread, butter, chocolate, biscuits, alcohol, milk, fruit,  washing powder, toiletries ....

Its pretty obvious when a room hasn't been cleaned by the smell...plus, I've seen the room...its gross...

I KNOW the bathroom hasn't been cleaned because I end up having to clean it (its the guest bathroom too)....

BOXtheFOX : Have no idea what you are talking about....


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## tk1 (3 Dec 2007)

i have had a similar experience and it was an absolute nightmare.  i was completely stressed the whole time.  My lodger was only there for 2 months and i had enough at that point.  The person had no respect for me, my house or any of the contents.  She left about 2 months ago and the smell is still in the bedroom.  i can't get rid of it and i have tried everything.  It would appear to be coming from the mattress which i am now going to have to get rid off.  I spent five hours in total cleaning both the bedroom and the bathroom it was so bad.  It hadn't been touched for the time she was there so i can only imagine what it would have been like if she had been there any longer.  When i addressed her about it she got really aggressive with me.  That was the icing on the cake so i sent her packing.  i think you should definitely get rid of your lodger and no you are not being unreasonable


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## outspann (3 Dec 2007)

In fairness, the minimum 4 week notice would have them out on the street for Christmas. Instead, give 8 weeks and that way you can do it guilt free. I've been a tenant in the past where the landlord started taking my stuff - what should I have done about that? Where was my comeback?

As for the post that said you can do what you like as its your home - well, it may be your house, but it is home to both of ye. And you also can't say on the one hand that "i'm only renting them a room", and on the other hand think "but they're not cleaning THEIR toilet". People who can afford it don't rent out rooms because it is hassle - there's always some bit of give and take on food and cleaning, that's just the way it is.

For sure, ask them to move out, but do it in a reasonable way, as you've tried to work things out, it hasn't happened, and it's the right think to do - just don't turn it into a way of getting your own back. There's no need to drop to that level.


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## Lauren (3 Dec 2007)

FYI outspann..did you read my posts?  I'm not planning on dropping to any level..He'll get eight weeks notice and that will have him out in mid Feb...I have never been anything but polite when discussing issues but it doesn't seem to matter..I don't agree about 'give and take' with food...From his perspective its take....and as far as I'm concerned, when its been made clear, then its not right...and trust is lost....The things I mentioned are only the things I've noticed and I wasn't exactly monitoring things that closely to begin with...
It would take an awful lot for me to get a lodger in again..Nothing pays for the stress and irritation of it.....


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## pinkyBear (3 Dec 2007)

> Nothing pays for the stress and irritation of it.


 I hear you....


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## outspann (3 Dec 2007)

Lauren,

Of course I read your posts. That's why I agreed with you to stick with the 8 weeks that you had given him. That seems a fair and reasonable length of time to give someone, and also allow you to feel completely guilt free in giving it. 

As to renting out a room being too much hassle, I wholeheartedly agree. I know from my own experience that even a perfect tenant removes the sense of complete privacy that buying your own home should give you. And from the other side, even when living with a great landlord, you are still in their home sitting on their couch watching their tv, etc, and that's not the greatest feeling either...

As for the give and take with food, I'm not suggesting he should be able to eat your last slice of pizza, but I do think that sometimes on a rainy night when you find that you're out of milk/butter/whatever and it's a long walk to the shop, it can be handy if you're able to borrow (and replace!) some food belonging to the person that you are sharing with - and that applies regardless of whether you are the landlord or just renting.


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## shootingstar (4 Dec 2007)

outspann said:


> In fairness, the minimum 4 week notice would have them out on the street for Christmas. Instead, give 8 weeks and that way you can do it guilt free.QUOTE]
> 
> 
> 
> ...



OP has been more than fair giving 8 weeks which is double the legal requirement i think.



Lauren said:


> FYI outspann..did you read my posts?  I'm not planning on dropping to any level..He'll get eight weeks notice and that will have him out in mid Feb...I have never been anything but polite when discussing issues but it doesn't seem to matter..I don't agree about 'give and take' with food...From his perspective its take....and as far as I'm concerned, when its been made clear, then its not right...and trust is lost....The things I mentioned are only the things I've noticed and I wasn't exactly monitoring things that closely to begin with...
> It would take an awful lot for me to get a lodger in again..Nothing pays for the stress and irritation of it.....



Agreed



outspann said:


> Lauren,
> 
> Of course I read your posts. That's why I agreed with you to stick with the 8 weeks that you had given him. That seems a fair and reasonable length of time to give someone, and also allow you to feel completely guilt free in giving it.
> .



You didnt agree, you told her to give 8 weeks, read back over your post. 


Lauren, If everything that your saying is correct, then you are doing the right thing. I had to put tenants out recently, and i was in a complete mess. It upset me for days after. Sort it now and look forward to a non-smelly happy house again. Good luck with it. 

SS


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## outspann (4 Dec 2007)

But the OP is giving eight weeks, as she said she would in her first post. Then somebody else advised her to give 4. My advice was to stick with the 8, and have no regrets about doing it.

I also said that having a tenant stay with an owner is (in my experience) always uncomfortable for both parties.

Can you show me where the OP and I disagreed over the 8 weeks?


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## Caveat (4 Dec 2007)

jazzhead said:


> yes you are


 
BTW, I think Jazzhead was simply saying "yes you are...being reasonable" 

That's how I read it anyway.


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## Caveat (4 Dec 2007)

..


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## shootingstar (5 Dec 2007)

outspann said:


> Can you show me where the OP and I disagreed over the 8 weeks?





outspann said:


> Instead, give 8 weeks and that way you can do it guilt free. .



Right there.. 

Again i repeat myself - I said "you didnt agree you told her"


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## Murt10 (5 Dec 2007)

8 weeks notice.

I think you are being unreasonable to yourself. This is your house and home we are talking about. You are going to be miserable over Christmas having to put up with him. He's abusing the trust you place in him to be a responsible tenant when he moved in. The relationship is over and you are only prolonging your own misery by allowing him to stay on notice for such a long period. 

Give him one weeks notice. Stretch it to two at a push, but that is as far as I would go. He'll have found something else by Christmas and anyway it's not your problem.




Murt


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## Conshine (5 Dec 2007)

Maybe she is holding out for an Xmas pressie!!


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## outspann (5 Dec 2007)

shootingstar,

- OP said that she had given 8 weeks notice. 
- Pinkybear (post #5) stated that they would only give 4 weeks. 
- I replied "In fairness, 4 weeks notice would have them out on the street before Christmas. Instead, give 8 weeks and that way you can do it guilt free".

I've no problem with you disagreeing with me over whether giving 8 weeks is right or wrong. But I'd appreciate if we didn't misquote each other or quote out of context.


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