Are you going to divide your estate equally between your children?

My view would be to divide everything equally and that's what we've done in our wills with relations appointed as guardians. My mother is leaving everything equally and my father is leaving one of us out of the will as a punishment. We haven't figured out which one of us it is but we'll have the last laugh as we'll agree to split it evenly. But what with the property collapse and shares nosediving there may not be anything worth fighting over. In any case with old age there may be costs that will have to be paid for out of assets and then there will be nothing at all.
 
You then have a further problem where one child might decide not to contact the parent for whatever reason. Then along comes a few grandchildren from the other children who can be the light and soul of the grandparents life. These grandchildren are also very important in the grand scheme of things. The adult child who no longer keeps in touch could be replaced by the new grandchildren, making things even messier.
 
Neither myself or my wife have a Will and have no intention making one. House is in joint name, so whichever one survives will own it 100%. Ultimately it will pass to our children.

As we've no complications in our family, its best to go with the Law of the land. Primary Legislation is more legally sound than any Will and so cant be challenged or manipulated by anyone. Also saves on legal/executors fees as grant of probate can easily be done without a lawyer as no complications and less paperwork.

I advised my grandmother to do this when she was alive and was glad that I did for a variety of reasons. Coincidently, my wife advised her grandmother of the same (passed away before we met) and again it was good advice.

Zero Will = Zero relatives trying to get included when person is old and vulnerable + Zero challenges when they pass away.
 
I think it is important to note that if a will states that a property is equally divided, then unless otherwise specified, it is equally divided by value, not by area, size or measurement.
 
csirl said:
Neither myself or my wife have a Will and have no intention making one. House is in joint name, so whichever one survives will own it 100%. Ultimately it will pass to our children.

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While I agree with your post in general it is different where there are children. For minor children you need to appoint guardians and give them the power to look after your children in a financial way.
 
Bronte said:
My mother is leaving everything equally and my father is leaving one of us out of the will as a punishment. We haven't figured out which one of us it is but we'll have the last laugh as we'll agree to split it evenly.
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He must be having a laugh. Either that or he is keeping you all at the end of a string, "Look after me in my old age or else", kind of thing.
 
Unfortunately he's being deadly serious, but we are taking no notice. We learnt that a long time ago.....
 
My father-in-law left the family house to his three children. The property was registered in their names and sold and a new house purchased for mother. All fine and dandy, but when mother dies and children sell the property, they will be liable to CGT on their family home inheritance, despite the housing crash. If FIL had left the house to his wife, then she could have left it in her will to kids, substantially mitigating the CGT, as she is alive still. Slim
 
Bronte said:
Unfortunately he's being deadly serious, but we are taking no notice. We learnt that a long time ago.....
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My father calls his Christmas gift to us our Christmas bonus and starts telling us about it on a weekly basis from mid November.
 
My simple argument would be: Leave your property to those who look after you and care for you in your old age.

I completely disagree with this.

It's not my children's responsibility to look after me in my old age. It is my responsibility to make sure that I have sufficient means to survive for as long as I live (if that makes sense!). I very much hope that I will have a close relationship with my children and that will want to spend time with me and share their lives with me and help me to sort out appropriate medical or other if necessary. But they don't owe me this irrespective of the relationship that I have with them and I would be horrified at the idea that my love for them or my commitment to provide for them was conditional on them giving up part of their adult lives to take care of me for an open ended amount of time.

Likewise, I don't believe that I am bound to care for my mother in her old age. She is currently hale and hearty but has made it abundently clear that she does not expect to live with any of her daughters as she gets older and that our own families and children should be our priorities. Of course if she were to get infirm or sick,my sisters and I would be visiting, making sure she was ok, arranging medical and other care if necessary and paying for it also if necessary and we were able to. But, for instance, my older sister lives in the States - if my mother were suddenly to become chronically, are you suggesting my sister should abandon her family and career and life in the States and come over and care for my mother in order to protect her inheritence? Or that me and my sister in Dublin should somehow try and plot to prevent her getting an equal share of my mother's estate if she didn't?

Frankly, if I felt for a moment that my mother was trying to manipulate me into doing anything for her by holding the carrot of her will over me, I'd happily tell her to shove it and do without a penny. In my view, it is unconscionable to do such a thing to your children.
 
txirimiri said:
My simple argument would be: Leave your property to those who look after you and care for you in your old age.
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Let me qualify my comment ... I don't mean to physically care for parents or to be at their constant beck at call to the detriment of their own lives (It was a wrong turn of phrase to use).

I too would tell my parents to 'shove' it if they expected me to be at their beck and call in their old age.

I mean .... Parents should leave their estate to the children who don't disappear into the wide blue yonder and only reappear for the distribution of the estate after they've died.

My basic argument is that children shouln't assume that they have an automatic right to their parents' funds/estate etc.

If children get on well with their parents that should be enough to earn the right to a share of the estate.

If they don't or do a disappearing act and show little regard for their parents then why leave them anything?

If they all get on with their parents by all means divide equally.

If not, tell them to head off and paddle their own canoes.
 
Slim said:
My father-in-law left the family house to his three children. The property was registered in their names and sold and a new house purchased for mother. All fine and dandy, but when mother dies and children sell the property, they will be liable to CGT on their family home inheritance, despite the housing crash. If FIL had left the house to his wife, then she could have left it in her will to kids, substantially mitigating the CGT, as she is alive still. Slim
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Don't understand this story. Did the man die and leave a house to his kids but out of the sale of this original house the mother received the money to purchase a different house. Presumable this would be equal to her legal right share.

Where is the capital gains tax arising when the mother dies and leaves the house she now lives in to her children?
 
ParkLane said:
You then have a further problem where one child might decide not to contact the parent for whatever reason. Then along comes a few grandchildren from the other children who can be the light and soul of the grandparents life. These grandchildren are also very important in the grand scheme of things. The adult child who no longer keeps in touch could be replaced by the new grandchildren, making things even messier.
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If you decide to include your grandchildren in your will you will end up having to constantly change your will as new grandchildren come along. Then again with the lowering of the inheritance threshold in the last budget you may find that you have a surplus of funds over the threshold that will be taxed. Why give it to the tax man when you could give it to your grandchildren.
My will leaves everything to my children including the one we never hear from. They are all loved and valued equally even though they might not think it.
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Grizzly said:
My will leaves everything to my children including the one we never hear from. They are all loved and valued equally even though they might not think it.
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That's a really lovely way to put it and encapsulates in a nutshell what I was trying to day in my post.

Whatever path my children take as adults and whatever relationship they choose to have with me, my lifelong parental love and commitment to them will not change
 
truthseeker said:
Probably as a result of the above my parents estate was an equal split but my sibling had not spoken to my parents in many years and a lot of care taking and responsibility had fallen to me. However, had I been unequally favoured I would have equalised it myself as it seems only fair that the split is equal.
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Why should your sibling get an equal portion the same as you if they did a disappearing act during your parents lifetime? I am sure your parents must have been heartbroken by the coldness of this act?
 
Laramie said:
Why should your sibling get an equal portion the same as you if they did a disappearing act during your parents lifetime? I am sure your parents must have been heartbroken by the coldness of this act?
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To answer your question " Why should they get money from their parents if they didn't talk to them ?". The simple answer is that the parents decided that they should and that is a good enough reason.

No-one has a right to an inheritance from their parents, it is a gift and not an entitlement.

As it clear from this thread, some will give the same gift to all their children and some will not. There is no right answer and no wrong answer.
 
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